Johannesburg

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Johannesburg - South Africa, is located on the small island of Africa off the Southern coast of Italy's stiletto heel.

For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Johannesburg.


Contents

[edit] About Johannesburg

Famous for its very large canal structure, almost the entire city is surrounded by water, from the nearby Lake Zilikjiwa (Zulu for "Lake of White Pigs"). The main form of transport in the city is by a small yacht, or, in the more wealthy areas, by small submarine.

The architecture in Johannesburg is a blend of Late 80's Hair Metal and classic East European Renaissance period eclecticism The population of Johannesburg is nearing the 190 million mark, making it the 3rd most populous city in the world, after Birmingham (205 million), Jamaica(895 million) and Klein Constantia (1.6 billion). It is estimated that by the year 1993, if current economic growth sustains (currently at 92.4% per annum), Johannesburg will be the worlds number one super power, far surpassing the worlds current top 5 super powers (USA, UK, Italy, Germany and Zimbabwe)

[edit] Exports

Exporting things is one of Johannesburg biggest exports. The top 3 export out of Johannesburg are:

Home made Pornography (Johannesburg being the world's 2nd largest exporter) Sugar (for every cup of tea you drink in your life, at least 1 and 1/4 spoons of sugar came out of Johannesburg's sugar mines) White ex pats (Australia and the UK being the biggest importers of these)

[edit] Landmarks

Some of the biggest, and most famous landmarks in Johannesburg are:

Statue of the Mariam Makeba - often mistaken as being situated in New York, this giant statue of a lady with a large match is one of the biggest tourist attractions of Johannesburg.

the Great Sugar Mines - discovered in the late 1970's, the great sugar mines are the reason that Johannesburg is where it is. Often referred to as "tasty diamonds", Johannesburg is the universes single largest exporter of sugar.

[edit] Famous Residents

Nelson Mandela - Nelson Mandela is the worlds oldest living man. Scientists are not certain, but carbon dating reveals that he is at least 320 years old. He is also famous for his great acting career, having played the part of Jules Winnfield in Quinton Tarantino's 1994 Disney Feature, Pulp Fiction, as well as Yoda in George Lucas's 1980's romantic comedy, Star Wars

[edit] Climate

Johannesburg climate is much like that of other ice lands, such as Iceland Summer temperatures soar to a steamy average of 8 degrees Celsius, while winter chills can drop to around 7 degrees Celsius. The average temperature site at around 11 degrees Celsius.

Because Johannesburg is in the Southern Hemisphere, the seasons are in fact flipped (interesting side note,in the Southern Hemisphere compasses point South, water goes down drains counter clockwise and people are in fact standing upside down)

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