“That shady guy with the glasses”
~ Oscar Wilde on JC Denton

“Can you say Matrix Ripoff!”
~ some Matrix Nerd on JC Denton
“It is not!......Wait, what is my name again?”
~ JC Denton on above quote, and JC Denton

This is what happens when you cross a Carebear and a Samurai.

For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about JC Denton.

JC Denton, born Jovius Carrol Denton, is a nano-augumented clone, originally conceived by George Lucas after he dreamed of morphing a Carebear with a Samurai, somehow this idea eventually turned into JC Denton.

JC Denton, though constructed to act as a Assassin,escaped George Lucas's control, and went on a quest to find the truth behind project Samurbear, the project responsible for his creation.JC Denton came across several opposing factions, his faith tested, eventually he was found in a sixth-story apartment building, addicted to kitty huffing, he has since gone missing, but Nobody Cares


After the failure of the piece of crap known as Star Wars the Phantom Menance, George Lucas spent his time sobbing and eating giant bags of doritos.As he was taking one of his many midday naps, he dreamed of what would happen if one could combined the senseless nature of a carebear, and the warrior like attributes of a samurai.Using his massive Fortune George Lucas assembled the organization Magestic 12, a cloning, nano-augumentive faction.Within the deep confines of Skywalker Ranch, a number of clones were forged, but only after twelve cloning attempts did Lucas succeed, naming him JC Denton after one of Lucas's former lovers, George augumented the Clones body to give him superior senses,machine skills, and the ability to sustain ones self entirely on oxygen alone, in esscence, a killer, that could go anywhere, and not be stopped, but JC had ideas of his own, and escaped the Fat Crazed Bastard before his body could be more twisted.

What happened after that is shadowy, and JC is believed to sought retreat at a gay bar owned by Tony the Tiger, It was here that JC took up Kitten Huffing, which became one of his main past-times, he even augumented his body so he could shit out kittens, a endless supply of kittents to huff.JC and Tony went into the Kitten Huffing business, becoming powerful Crime Lords in the Seattle Area of Oregon.

Later YearsEdit


A recent sighting of JC Denton, he has now ascended to Kitten Huffing God

In 2006 Tony the Tiger was found dead in his apartment, six gun wounds in his chest, it was later discovered that the Count Chocula and others had stormed the Tiger Drug Lord and killed him, JC Denton was nowhere to be found.For a few months rumours spread that JC Denton was dead, but these rumours were proven wrong when JC Denton was discovered to living in a Sixth Story apartment in Downtown Seattle, police had been called to the room after several people bitched about thousands of meows coming from JC's apartment.The police, upon entering the room, discovered JC laid prone on the floor, kittens being excreted from his ass.JC was taken to a local medic, his Kitten Blood Count(KBC) was Five hundred points above normal, JC wound up in Rehab a week later.


JC has once again disappeared, many believe this time the Samurai Carebear has continued the hunt for his True past, but truly, Nobody Cares

Only two people have read this article - you, nobody, and that Deus Ex nerd, congratulations.

See alsoEdit