I do what I wanna do
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|Hey, shithead! Clean up this damn room! I'ma go down to the slut camp. This shit better be clean when I get back, little faggot! If it ain't, I'ma cut yo ass up and piss on your face.|
|What the fuck was you say?!?|
|That's what I thought. Now hurry your ass and clean this house up!|
I think my teacher's on the rag
Whenever I'm in class, all that bitch does is just nag.
"Kyle Broflovski, do that! No dipshit, do this!"
That's part of the reason I like to skip school. Then I go to the train tracks and smoke weed or pop E. After that, I go to the mall. Usually I go to Krystal's first, though. When I get there, I smack all the girls on their asses. I don't care if they're good looking. Hell, the ugly the better, cause then the ugly girls think I like them or something. Then, I get to have even more fun telling they are ugly and I was only attracted to the hot girl standing next to them. Most of the time, they start crying.
Then, once I'm done there, I go to the nearby Best Buy. When I'm there, I act like I'm actually going to buy stuff. I get a few games and DVDs, go and stand in line like I'm going to buy them, all that shit. Then, right when it's my turn to have stuff rung up, I make a dash to the door. It's like an extreme sport. I swear. I love the adrenaline rush. You should do it sometime. Last time I did though, I tripped smashed everything. They were telling me I had to pay for the stuff I broke, but then I threatened to sue them because I was injured.
Threatening legal litigation always works.
I hate my dad
I like drinking his beer when he's not here. I drink on the back of the porch and break shit. A couple of weeks ago, I broke all the windows in his car and ripped his ignition. I went and drove it straight into the ditch in front of our house.
What? It was fun. Like I said before, I do whatever I want to! You can't stop me! I'm the best! Fuck what you tell me to do! I don't have to listen to you! I do what I fucking want to do! Even your mom. Speaking of mom's...
My mom is a dirty whore
My dad has caught her cheating twice. Then, she claimed she thought it was him she was fucking. Somehow, I ended up getting blamed for it. She always tells me I should go to school. Yes, the same fucking school that she dropped out of twenty some odd years ago. Oh, but the bitch wants me to go to it! What the fuck is up with that? Hypocritical bitch...
She beats me with a broom whenever I break the rules. Yes, a broom. I'm not making this shit up. "Love thy parents" my ass. You know who the fuck made that up? Moses. His kids fucking hated him, too. What? You didn't know he had children? Yeah. He had about 20 of them. And they all hated him. That's why he made up that whole lie about God giving him those stone tablets. He must've been stoned when he was writing those. The first five books of the Bible were just vanity. They really were.
Damn, I just wanna kill them and hide the bodies where nobody will ever find them. I'm 16 and I still have an 8 o'clock curfew, for-Fuckssakes!
What the fuck?!?
Serious. What in hell?!? I'm SIX-FUCKING-TEEN!!! I should be out fucking sluts and date raping cows or whatever it is teenagers do! I shouldn't be watching ancient Jimmy Stewart movies on TCM! Fuck this.