Yes, I pissed on a hobo and I liked it.
You Pissed On A Hobo And You Liked It?!
Yes, I pissed on a hobo and I liked it. Chasing down hobos while I piss and ejaculate is a great way to pass time. I just hope my girlfriend doesn't mind that fact I pissed on a hobo. She tends to be a cunt.
Now sure, during moments of my pee parade, a part of my mind told me "Hey dude, this might be illegal." But fuck my dog if it didn't feel so right. These feelings of immense pleasure does not mean I was a pervert last night. That's just a goddamn lie. I accidentally tripped over a rock which consequently caused my cock to become erect which then caused it to spew yellow and white rain all over a random hobo. It could have happened to anybody! And sure, in the whole mess of things, I might have liked it. Wait, are you telling me earlier that I said, "Chasing down hobos while I piss and ejaculate is a great way to pass time"? Hmm, I don't recall... I don't recall...
Did You Know Anything About This Hobo You Pissed On?
Nope, I didn't even know the hobo's name. At the time I didn't really think it mattered. Did I really want to know the name of the guy who I was going to urinate all over? No way, hosay! I just unzipped my expensive designer pants and allowed the orange juice to flow. This might sound perverted but at the time I imagined him as my experimental game. Not the type of game you shoot and kill, but the type of game that you piss on. For me it was just human nature, pissing on this stranger. Good golly don't give me that face, pissing is normal for everyone. Everyone pisses; it's something we got to do. So what if I used this hobo as my private pee puddle instead of one of those corporate rip-off toilets. I know it's not what good people do and how I should have behaved but you got to believe me man; I was stoned out of my mind! My head got so confused. It made it impossible for me to obey my normal habits. I felt so free peeing on that hobo.
Can You Describe This Hobo You Pissed On?
It was dark, man. I was more stoned and drunk than usual. The only things I remembered before pissing on him was that he had rather soft skin. This certainly came as a surprise for me since I thought most hobos had rough, unshaven, acne ridden skin. But unbelievably this man had the softness of a baby's butt cheek. The same couldn't be said for his lips which turned out to be pretty drab. So I bought some lipstick from the local shop and gave him a dutiful makeover. I made him into a young Tina Turner. His lips illuminated a saucy, red hot presence. This made them very kissable. Out of my drunken, coke ridden hysteria, I kissed him, multiple times. But I didn't really enjoy it, he kept screaming and spitting in my face. In my naked rage – yes by this time I was naked, I realized that giving him a Tina Turner makeover was not going to satisfy my needs. So like I said many times before, I floored the poor guy with my penis juice. After that he didn't really have any decipherable features. He kind of looked like a pee monster.
Would You Like To Take Your One Phone Call?
Wait I'm going to jail over this?! Okay, okay I know I pissed on a hobo. But I just couldn't help it. I was drugged out of my skull. So what if I pissed on some hobo on the street. He probably forgot about the whole thing. He does have bigger problems to worry about. Like the fact he doesn't have a home and lacks proper beauty products to help accentuate his delicate skin. Typical police, never have the right priorities. No wonder people call you pigs and spit on your pointy hats! But whatever I'll take my phone call, pig.
“Hey babe, I'm in the police station. Well I peed on some stranger and they're all busting in my grill. Yeah I peed on a guy. Last night, don't you remember? I told you I had to use the bathroom but never came back? Yeah well during that time I did a line of coke off a hooker's vagina and later found some homeless guy and peed on his face. Babe?... Baby Cakes?... THE BITCH HUNG UP ON ME!”