HowTo talk:Write Colin Meloy Lyrics
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edit Pee 1
|Humour:||7.25||Before I say anything else, just let me say that this is really, really good for a first article. Like, holy crap. I didn't get to the point you're at your first go until my fifth or sixth article. So yeah, kudos. Anyway...
This article is smart and subtle, just the way I like 'em. Here's what I liked:
Here's where I think you can improve:
|Concept:||7.5||This is a tried and tested concept, so you don't get many originality points, but your execution is quite good. There really isn't much more to say, to be honest, so yeah. Moving right along...|
|Prose and formatting:||6.75||You write fairly well, so there's not much I can criticize. There were a few typos ("believe" instead of "belief" in the introduction, "to start liking" instead of "starting to like" a little later on, a few more things in this vein throughout the article, etc. Beyond your minor typos (nothing a copy-paste to a word document with spell/grammar check couldn't fix), and maybe a lacking comma or two, your prose is quite solid, though. Formatting, though, is another story:
And, finally, my biggest complaint of all:
|Images:||5.5||None of the images really stood out. Though most of them are relevant to the topic of the article, none of them really grabbed my attention, ya know? Though many articles aren't at all image-based, and, indeed, don't need to be, having good pictures always helps. I really liked the first two images of Colin with his band and his other band, but after that nothing was really great. If I were you, I'd remove the two images unrelated to the topic, and replace them with more Colin Meloy goodness. Perhaps a series of images of Meloy looking introspective, or something--I feel that would be much funnier. Also, as a more general critique, your images should all be a bit bigger, so they stand out more.|
|Miscellaneous:||7.5||A little above your average. You get bonus points for this being your first article, plus I feel this has a lot of potential a little proofreading and polish could easily bring out.|
|Final Score:||34.5||I listened to the second half of The Hazards of Love while writing this, and it's quite good.|
|Reviewer:||—Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 21:43, November 4, 2009 (UTC)|
edit Pee 2
|Introduction to your reviewer
I like to tell my reviewees about myself so you'll know how unqualified I am. I won RotM for last month, so some people think I don't totally suck. As for Colin Meloy and the Decemberists, virtually all I know about him/them I read on Wikipedia, so I may be missing some of the references (that's why I waited to review this to give someone who knew more a chance, but as it hasn't been done you're stuck with me). I have been involved in music for a long time, and have written poetry and songs, so maybe that sort of redeems me.
|Concept:||8||The concept seems to be "I'm going to show you how great and knowledgeable and yet open-minded I am about art and Colin Meloy but will really show you how pretentious and closed minded ignorant I am." I think that's fine, and like the way you bring in information about Colin Meloy (frankly, I almost feel like I learned more from your article than from Wikipedia's on Colin Meloy).|
|Prose and Formatting:||7.5||I put most or all Humour comments in with Prose and Formatting so I don't repeat myself unnecessarily.
The parts I liked best I would definitely rate higher. But other bits bring the score down a bit, which I'll explain below.
What to write about?--the question mark isn't needed here and in How to write them?, and personally I'd cut it. If all your main sections had question marks maybe, but they don't.
How to write them?
Putting it all Together
A Final Note
|Humo(u)r:||7.5||I almost gave this a higher score, but the parts that need work bring it down. Also the humour is somewhat one note, if you'll excuse the expression.|
|Images:||8||I like the photos and captions, and got a kick out of "Captions that correspond to the picture are so mainstream!"--it's like your writer couldn't think of a caption, so is covering. "If Colin Meloy |
|Miscellaneous:||7.75||average of above|
|Final Score:||38.75||Again, I liked this article, and would rate it significantly higher with some improvements. I think you may have a problem with much of your audience being ignorant of Colin Meloy (as I was, although this got me interested enough that I'm going to check out his music). Also you might want to know when I score an article just under 40 points it means I think it's almost VFH. Definitley let me know on my talk page if you edit this.|
|Reviewer:||WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 04:35, December 11, 2009 (UTC)|
edit Colin Meloy and The Decemberists
edit Serj Tankian
I think this article should also include a "See also" section with a link to HowTo:Write Serj Tankian Lyrics since both articles are about writing lyrics in the style of someone else 184.108.40.206 17:39, January 20, 2010 (UTC)