HowTo talk:Properly Dispose of The Forces of Emo
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They are everywhere, standing in front of your school, standing in front of the movies, standing in front of your house, basically they just stand in front of whatever might allow them to be judged by people, sure they say they don't like being judged, but do you really think that they would spend hours sticking glue in their hair if they didn't.
We all know what emo's are and what they look like, but after the three to five hours they spend getting their hair just right what else do they do? Oh that and apart from all the standing around making the surround land wish global warming would hurry up and kill these fuckers. Well the truth is, basically nothing. Well i wouldn't class whining anything important, although it does take up most of their time.
So now that you know that have no purpose, do you really think they need to live?
Now to disposing of them. According to them and their idols you play with them and their "paper hearts will bleed". So grab yourself some bats, wickets and an emo or two and play some cricket!
But if your not really the sporty type, and would rather play video games take some inpiration from them, since emo's always congrgate in large groups two things you could do are:
1)If your driving- Allow yourself a number of points for each emo you hit (the fat ones are double points!) and then just swerve off the road and BAM! You have done you part for the world today.
2)Since they like to think they are hardcore and can mosh, create a moshbot (which will conceal a large bomb) and send it into a group of them, then put on some of "the used" or something simular, start the moshbot up and see how they all get drawn into the mosh pit. When you are satisfied with the number of emo's you have collected detonate the bomb and HOORAH emo soup.
Emo's are like cockroaches, and you wouldn't want bunches of cockroaches just sitting there all day, with badly coloured hair and tight clothes, so do to the emo's as would would cockroachs. Lets squish the emo's!
edit An Official Response from the Emo Disposal Society
While these techniques are a bit nontraditional, multiple lab tests at several Maroon 5 concerts and Taco Bell parking lots have proven them to be quite effective. If you find a way to insert them into the article without distrupting most of our original teachings, we will approve and that smiling baby sun will surely charge his lazerz of glory.