HowTo:Make up quotes
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
“Don't do it. Please. How would you like to ... be me?”
“STOP QUOTING ME!”
“BOW BEFORE THE GOD EMPEROR FOUL HERETIC!”
~ common space marine(n00b)
“Know your Sun-Tzu quotes.”
“I like quoting”
~ that guy on quoting
“kill all quotes”
~ hitler on fucking quotes
“everyone quotes ”
~ nobody
“Fake quotes are everywhere, they are all around us. Even now, in this very article.”
~ Morpheus on Making up Matrix quotes
“In Soviet Russia, I quote YOU!!! Hows that Wilde!”
“WHO THE MOTHER FUCKING FUCK IS MAKING UP QUOTES!”
“Quote me now, With shrooms in me, A Purple Cow, I surely see!”
~ Gelett Burgess on Making up quotes
“PIMP NIGGA DAWGG!!!!!1”
~ Some on pretending to make an Oscar Wilde quote (George Bush), yet failing miserably for a variety of reasons
[edit] Why ?
frame|center|The horrible horrible truth
Well, first off, read a genuine quote. For once. From Uncyclopedia:
- It has come to the attention of Uncyclopedia that fake Oscar Wilde quotes have been maliciously placed into pages here. In order to fix this problem, Uncyclopedia has designated a special page for Official Oscar Wilde Quotes.
Template:FuotesPages That said, here's what's really going on. We were all bored. Really really really bored in a cosmic sort of way. We had reached a level of boredom the likes of which had never before been seen in the Wikipedia universe. It was a boredom of epic proportions. A burning searing flame of boredom. And then sombody started posting fake quotes on Wikipedia, but they get shut down by the Men in Black who hired the Nationally Elected Gangsta Regulatory Organization to use their Mind Control powers to ensure only Official Quotes would end up on wikis.
But the fake quoters arose again on Uncyclopedia where we believe that the Thought Police are always evil evil evil.
So join the revolution! Start making up quotes from gay people like Oscar Wilde and even from straight people like God.
Mark Twain, Winston Churchill and Arthur C. Clarke have also fallen prey to this sort of nonsense. It's wilde!
“It will never end! People simply love to make up quotes for me”
Well, it might, if we all die in a worldwide famine.
“Just Say No to Making up Oscar Wilde quotes”
~ Making up Oscar Wilde Quotes]]
[edit] How to Do It
So far as how to actually do it, first you have to think of a really good quote. Good quotes need sources. If you already have in mind something funny you want to say, you have to think of the funniest person in history to have said it. This person has to be extremely quotable for this to work out right. Think of the most dignified person who has ever been quoted, like 50 Cent, Oscar Wilde, Mikhail Gorbachev or Michael Jackson. Then use somebody else funnier instead, because that was a stupid idea. Go wash out your mind with soap, and then continue reading, you perv.
If you can think of a good source but can think of nothing funny for it to say, then JUST FORGET ABOUT IT because it will likely be deleted with the next edit of the page, and only annoy people instead of amusing them.
If, on the other hand, you finally have the perfect quote that will have us burst out laughing, then ALWAYS FORMAT YOUR QUOTES because otherwise you look like a retard. To get the correct format, just edit this page to get the code (from any of the quotes on this page, no adding templates here please!) and start filling our pages with more redundant fake quotes!!!
“Go to hell.”
~ God
“Go to heaven.”
~ Satan
“Shut up and die”
“heaven is not wheelchair accesible”
~ guy in wheelchair
“Do not try and make up the quote. That's impossible. Instead... only try to realize the truth...there is no quote.”
~ bald psychokenetic child from from the Matrix on why you should not try to make up quotes
“Sorry, kid, this is a quote. And the chemo isn't working.”
~ Neo on replying to the bald kid
