HowTo:Make a That's What She Said joke

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Attempt to explain joke

This article attempts to explain a joke in minute detail, as if to an idiot, a very small child, or a very small child who is also an idiot. It also attempts to explain its own explanation, which, if successful, could result in crashing the universe. Please do not crash the universe.

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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about That's what she said.

“Moderation is key!”

~ Feminoparlologists on "that's what she said" jokes

“What DID she say?”

~ Oscar Wilde on that's what she said

“THAT's what she said!”

~ Howard Stern on the previous quote

“That's what he said!”

~ RuPaul on the previous quote

“That's what shim said!”

~ Adam West on the previous quote

Why, dad, why?

It has happened to the best of us: you're sitting smack-dab in the middle of the most awkward, most thunderous, echoing silence with a guy you barely know. You also have the misfortune of being on the receiving end of a terrible joke, the punchline of which involved homosexuality. You would have laughed (it was coherent, and he did really try to sell it), but due to your father's recent admission of his bi-curiousity, a polite chuckle was all you could muster before your mind conjured images of you, him... some furry monstrosity... lets just call it a threesome that makes you suddenly quite nauseous. You're sure that in order to maintain your composure and not vomit profusely in front of this person, you need to throw some sexual innuendo into the conversation -- you know, to show you get ass like a mo'fucka.^[1] And, like magic, your companion nervously turns to you and says "this bench (the bench that he refers to is, of course, the one underneath your ass) is hard, no?" He smiles coyly. You open your mouth to say something snappy (employing sharp alliteration, oh yes), but you are at a loss for words. You tense up. Instead, you merely stammer while trying to announce that you're going to the bathroom...again. The walk of tongue-tied shame that kills any chance you had of seeing this person again socially. What can you do to prevent such a travesty in the future? Thats What She Said... PENIS!!!