HowTo:Draw a perfect circle

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search
Circledraw

This is how posers draw circles. Lets see you do it without the compass, phony!

Drawing perfect circles is a past-time enjoyed by very few. Sadly, the general population as a whole has no ability to comprehend such an advanced geometric shape, let alone draw one. Rather, they must resort to using compasses or tracing circular objects. However, when critically analyzed, circle drawing is, in fact, rather simple, and can be broken down to either a one or nine step method.

One Step Method

Draw a circle.

Nine Step Method

Step One

Using a #4 9H Palomino graphitic writing instrument, gently place a lightly colored dot, a, on the center of a 5½" by 6¾" piece of preserved Egyptian papyrus.

Step Two

Choose a radius, r, for your circle. Using a straightedge composed of either Brazilian chestnut or teak, lightly draw a line segment with a measure of r, using a as one endpoint and newly created b as the other, at a 35.7° angle.

Step Three

Using the new and improved circumference formula, C=2πri 230(30.5)+1, calculate the exact circumference of your circle in terms of pi.

Step Four

Purchase a length of manila rope with a diameter 1.32". Slice it into two pieces each exactly equal to the calculated circumference with a Cold Steel Recon 1 tanto plain blade.

Step Five

Dip one piece of rope, R1, into a vat of A+++ quality India ink. Soak the second piece, R2, in distilled water.

Step Six

Gently place R1 on top of R2. This should properly dilute the ink.

Step Seven

Placing one end at b, lie R1 in a circular formation, keeping each atom exactly r away from a.

Step Eight

Touch R1 with a lit match, burning it off the page at a temperature between 387.04 and 387.05 kelvin. Gently blow away the ashes with a blowing speed of 0.234 knots, leaving only the India ink behind.

Step Nine

Feel free to apply Clifford's circle theorems as desired. The resulting drawing should look something like this:

Badcircle
You did it!
Personal tools
projects