HowTo:Cheat on RuneScape

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RuneScape is a MMORPG in which players create a little guy that doesn't change in any way (not growing facial features or any thing) unless you give an experienced player/pedophile 3,000 gold, and even then they still look walking pieces of shit that do nothing other than bore you to hell and leave you with no choice than to keep performing mundane tasks to level up, most of which aren't very hard and that you could be doing in real life to actually contribute to society but that you're instead doing on a stupid free online game that will have no outward effect on your life.

edit History

Runescape

The foolish player labours day and night to increase his player's rank; the wise player takes that frustration and downloads a bot. ~Book of Zamorak 13:7[1]

“There was once a programmer who was playing RuneScape. All of a sudden, he thought: Wouldn't it be great if I could leave this Woodcutting and go and do something else? That way i can get a life! And so he set to work creating this MasterPiece.”[2]

The obvious issue with this concept was that he was still playing RuneScape, albeit by proxy. Therefore he lost the small amount of pseudo-life he actually had.

edit Operation

"I want to use a bot, but I don't know how it works!"

A bot works in a very simple way, which ensures even RuneScape players are able to use one.

Most bots work by reading the different coloured pixels on your screen; for example, with "Sythes PowerMiner". The bot will ask the player to first store the lightest colour of the 'ore' you want to mine, and then to store the buckle of the inventory bag.

When you press "Let's Go", the miner will take control of the mouse. It will mine the rocks that you set the colour of until you have a full inventory; it then activates an 'autodropper'. This works in a similar way to the miner: it just reads the colour of the ore in your inventory, places the cursor over it, and selects the drop command from the right click drop-down menu.

The advantage of this is that it will allow you to succeed in a meaningless online pursuit that will be of no real life benefit whatsoever.

edit Bot Nuke

On October 25th, 2011, Jagex decided to make the game "fairer and more fun" which equally translates to "now everyone must play 10-15 hours a day to become l33t,[3] and since bots pretty much allowed everyone to get massive amounts of xp,[4] the game will be forever unfair to those who have never macro'd."

Despite this, player response was almost unanimously positive from those whose opinions were not deleted from official forums.

Need a waifu

A comment taken from a RuneScape official forum. The irony of this statement is lost on most RuneScape players.

Software such as RSBuddy, Powerbot, RS Bot, and EpicBot, have for the most part, crumbled under the bot nuke, RSBuddy going as far as to shut down after its creator "Mod Jacmod" decided to give false hope and steal everyone's money.

Colorbots however, still remained strong but were hit hard with Jagex's gourraud update, spontaneously and randomly changing much of Runescape's color scheme. Robotz in Disguise have since, relased an official statement:

“Yes, although Jagex has fucked us again with Gourraud, we will still be charging outlandish prices for our shitty bots. Thank you.”
~ Some bot in love.

Will bots ever come back? Will the fat kids continue to rejoice as they are better rewarded for their 10-15 hours of daily gaming? The answers are uncertain. For now, we can only waste our lives on a meaningless role-playing game.

edit References

  1. Although the truly wise player avoids RuneScape.
  2. The term “MasterPiece” is used very loosely here.
  3. l33t or 1337 is a title that has significance within the RuneScape gaming community only. While exact definitions are difficult, observation determines the best definition is a 30 year old obese man who lives in his parents' basement.
  4. xp is an abbreviation of experience points. The irony of this description is lost on most RuneScape players.
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