Hologram

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Holograms have always been a part of the world's view of the future. Ever since the first killer robots and man-eating martians were envisioned, these scientific milestones have invaded the imaginations of many an adventuresome human. They can be found in such culture icons as Star wars, Star Trek, Godzilla, Transformers, and The Very Hungry Catapillar.The hologram is a device created by aliens for the sole purpose of biting butts off of humans. They can take any shape they desire, and are sold in kits on various websites such as this one. They are inherently evil, although Bill Gates once attempted to give them away for free with various Microsoft software. They were advertised as the following: "Free Microsoft live-in babysitter for your Bill Gates children included with every Microsoft purchase. Bill Gates."

Holograms lure humans in, hypnotize them, suck out any anal fluids with a bendy straw, then proceed to toss them into a pot of rancid tick meat. Bill Gates.


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^^^These images show the vast diversity of hologram shapes.^^^ ________________________________________________________________________________________________


edit Television Kissing

Holograms have been known to kiss televisions, and do so frequently. During a kissing session, a holgram occasionally chooses to stuff spaghetti in the air ventilation ducts of the television. This spaghetti will age into another hologram, at which case the television will asplode for no apparent reason, and the second hologram will climb into the first refigerator it sees, after the spaggetti turns into another hologram and the television asplodes.

edit Hollywood examples

It is a well know fact that Micheal Jackson owns several of these holograms, using them frequently as excuses to the parents of young children when they ask where their child has been. Example: "Oh, one of my holograms bit his/her butt off last night, and if you find any traces of rape, my holograms thought he/she was a television" Paris Hilton also used the excuse to her parents, "The man in that sex tape was only a hologram! It was halloween and I dressed as a TV! The Carl's JR commercial? The hamburger hologram hypnotized me!! I swear!" Britney Spears has received much public scrutiny for paparazzi photos showing evidence of her recent decision to not wear any undergarments, although she claims the said photos were of a reincarnated hologram searching for a refrigerator.

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