Hippo toss

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search

An action shot of this valiant sport.

Hippo toss is an Eastern Egyptian sport popularised by hippos. During the great depression, the hippos did not have enough money to buy Televisions or radios, they had to invent their own sports. Most hippos did not have enough money for balls or other recreational objects either. Then one day, as a new mother was eating breakfast, she put her new child on her nose and tossed him to another hippo.

edit The popularising


This one looks good for tossin'

At first the sport of hippo toss did not gain popularity due to the grossness and mess if one fails to catch the hippo. But around the time of the great hippo Civil war, while hippos were killing each other (hippos are actually very violent creatures) the sport became huge, although mostly the hippos would toss baby hippos from the other side. Soon hippo tossing became a regular event. Hippos from all round would watch the fun of the other baby hippo dying. Soon a set of rules were developed. At first they were crude but become more refined as '''the game''' (you just lost it) became more widespread.

edit The Rules

The basic rules for Hippo toss are as follows:

  • Toss the Hippo
  • Whoever fails to catch hippo must clean up the mess
  • the longer it takes to drop the hippo, the more points lives the winner gets for the next round (they loose when they run outof lives and have to clean up ALL the baby hippos

edit The tournament

Every full moon, all the hippos in the world gather for one large hippo toss tournament, this is similar to Baseball tournaments except it doesn't suck. Oh, and if you were thinking that this had anything to do with the masturbation of hippos you need to go to a doctor. Or possibly Africa.

The tournament never ends, like tennis, it just goes on and on. there are no prizes, hippos just play for fun and the joy of watching a baby hippo splatter it's guts open on a sharp rock

edit The Fall of Hippo Tossing

The problem came when there were no longer enough baby hippos to continue the game. This caused enemy tribes fighting Philosopholis Thompson in a attempt to capture more baby hippo’s. The only weapons they had was to through baby hippos and so the hippo nation was stuck in a endless circle of hippo tossing and stealing until all the hippos were dead.

Personal tools