Hippie flu

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“I had the hippie flu once. Then I turned to Satan. ”

~ Random Guy

“I know what it is! It's a uh... What were we talking about?”

~ Stoned Hippie

“I haven't found a cure for Hippie flu, but it's funnier than hell when stoned patients try to get cured.”

~ Foot Doctor

“I invented hippie flu. It was initially intended as a virus whereby hips have flu-like symptoms. Long story short, the illness God got the wrong end of the totem pole and I thought, "Hey, let's roll with it!"”

~ Witch Doctor

The hippie flu is, in all basic terms, a disease which turns you into a hippie. Nobody knows exactly how the hippie flu started and there are multiple theories. It was probably started when Jesus came to a random VW mini-bus and "blessed" those poor people inside. Hippie flu spreads rapidly, just doing drugs or having sex with a hippie will give you hippie flu. It is almost exactly like AIDS, except you don't get killed by it; you turn into a hippie forever, depending whether you like the suffering of a hippie or the suffering of Hell.

[edit] Symptoms

The symptoms of hippie flu are

Feeling like The Man is oppressing you.
Having a desire to make "special" brownies.
Wanting to hang out with a bunch of people naked and high.
You protest against some war, or another thing just propagated by the man to portray a negative stereotype that all Americans are gun toting maniacs whose only goal is to dominate other countries.
You forget where the hell you are.
Your goal in life is to get more weed.
Your other goal in life is to get LSD.
You have a sudden interest in Jimi Hendrix.