Heisenberg uncertainty relations

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First of all, the Heisenberg uncertainty relations are an incredibly effective way of getting rid of people.

Not people in general but people that tend to be a pain in the ass when discussing with them. People that adore using foreign words without actually knowing their meanings. People that like to put every subject into a political context, especially Communism or Marxism. People that have an opinion about EVERY subject. People that just don't have a clue, in fact.

Unfortunately, one cannot stop folks like that by telling them that it's naive to be pro-PND because "it'll surely help curing disabled kids in South Africa" as PND will rather be used to avoid disabled kids being born in the first place.. but.. well. Nevermind.

Anyway, THIS is the point when you either ask yourself if your health insurance will pay for lobotomy (that would surely ease your pain) OR you remember this article which gave you a great weapon:

HEISENBERG UNCERTAINTY RELATIONS! (bababaaaa!)

[edit] How to use it

When a dialogue comes to an annoying point, as described in #1, just mention the HUR (Heisenberg uncertainty relations). 9 of 10 dumbasses will decide to shut up. Money-back guarantee! It will also shape your whole body and can easily be put under your restform highrise bed and never be used again!

[edit] Just for the record - what is it all about, that uncertain Heisenberg thingy?

Just in case you have to explain the Heisenberg uncertainty relations (which shouldn't happen because then you would have missed your aim - see #1 and/or #2).

The Heisenberg uncertainty relations are so to say an antithesis to deterministic theories that say something like "if you can describe one moment of a system`s state exactly, you can describe any other of its states at ANY other time". Sounds suspicious. Along with that central deterministic slogan goes the belief that everything is bound to destination .. which might be a problem for some people.

So obviously, it was just a matter of time when there was going to be something like the HUR. Now, the HUR says "well, you silly science-wanker, you CAN'T describe a state exactly, so forget about your deterministic world view! IN YOUR FACE!"

[edit] An example

Explanation according to a simple example that should be easily understood: Imagine a tiny little piece of I-dunno-what. A molecule or electron, whatever. This is the "system" we analyse. To find out it's exact state, we irradiate it with A) short-wave or B) long-wave light. A) tells us place, B) tells us impulse (speed, direction). BUT A) and B) can't be determined at the same time!

Thank God, there is a simple formula to illustrate this and lead us to quantum mechanics: The uncertainty of place delta x multiplied with the uncertainty of impulse delta p is always bigger or the same as h (h = 6,6261 · 10-34 Js ) divided by 4π. Great, isn't it?

Additional information about senseless wisdom can be found in any of Stephen Hawking's great essays.