Halloween II (2009 film)

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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Halloween II (2009 film).
Warning: This article is biased and may represent the opinion of Nobody . However, it may not reflect Rob Zombie’s opinion, which he often contradicts anyway. Don’t change a thing to remedy this.
“This movie SUCKS BIG CHUNKS of MONKEY BALLS without Daeg Faerch... BIG TIME!”
~ Captain Obvious on Halloween II and the Daeg Faerch recast
~ Captain Obvious on the whole friggin' movie
“Where the fuck is Daeg?”
~ Nobody on Halloween II
“This movie sucks the sweat off a dead man's balls.”
~ Roger Ebert on Halloween II
Hobo Myers final

In this scene from Halloween II, Michael Myers (Zakk Wylde) tells Laurie Strode (Scout-Taylor Compton, not pictured) to "DAH, YA MUTHAFUCKIN' BEE-ITCH!!!"

Halloween II (formerly known as H2, Halloween: The Devil Walks Among Us, Halloween II: Electric Boogaloo, and Halloween: Crucifixtion (of Rob Zombie)) is Rob Zombie’s 2009 abortion of the Halloween franchise. It is not a remake of the Halloween II that came out in 1981. Unlike the previous film, H2 was intended to suck. This change in direction popped in the writer-director’s head when he smoked some weed.

Plot, or lack thereof

There's a white horse from some reason, but it doesn't talk like Mr.Ed



Inside directors Maury (pictured) and Bastillo were originally chosen to helm Halloween II.


You may have noticed that the androgynous kid that played young Michael had been replaced by another androgynous kid to play Young Michael. Maybe you didn't



The Infamous P-Cut

After the release of the theatrical and director's cuts of the movie, Rob Zombie revealed to Ain't It Cool News that he had created a new version called the Pretentious Cut (or P-Cut, not to be confused with the P-Cut of Halloween 6):

"I was watching Eraserhead while on LSD, and it occurred to me that I should make a third cut of Halloween II that made absolutely no sense whatsoever. Of course, I'd never officially release this cut to the world, but I will tell a few people on the Official Halloween Message Board about it so that they can spread the word and let the P-Cut's reputation grow amongst the fanbase. Then I'll slap a copy of it on eBay or something and make no fortune."

Here is a partial list of the changes in the P-Cut:

  • The pumpkin opening credits are restored.
  • We learn that the white horse signifies that Michael is a Replicant.
  • As Brackett stands over Laurie's body, that guy from Stand and Deliver appears to say, "It's too bad she won't live, but then again, who does?"
  • The long-lost jitterbug scene with Dorothy Gale is restored.
  • The intricate flashback structure initially envisioned by Zombie has been restored.
  • Since the film now begins at the end then jumps to the middle before it actually starts, a detailed voiceover narration from Sam Loomis is now included, in the hopes of eliminating audience confusion. Unfortunately, due to an oversight, most of the VO has nothing to do with what's actually occurring on-screen.

Halloween 3D

On opening day, it was announced that Halloween II would be followed by Halloween 3D, which would have a new writer and director, and be released in the summer of 2010. No details were given, so speculation was high. Some predicted another reboot, while others predicted another Zombie-esque failure. A handful of people predicted it would simply be the original Halloween in 3D.

Although Steve Miner (Friday the 13th Part 3D, Halloween H20: Twenty Years Later) was the rumored director, it was announced that Todd Farmer would write, with Patrick Lussier directing. Conflicting news reports followed, including one stating that the Weinsteins were looking for pitches for the film. Farmer gave a long and detailed account of the events leading to the cancellation of the film.

Halloween III may or may not resume production until the duo is finished with the Nicolas Cage film, Drive Angry.

See Also

External links

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