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Ahoy, me hearty and welcome to Pirateopedia (formally HMS Uncyclopedia), the duty-free encyclopedia that pirates can edit Arghh!


Davey Jones has inspired us to sink and pillage 31,827 ships since we set sail in January 2005.

Before running out your guns, please read the ships charter and the pirates code or you'll be Walking the Plank.
If you scurvy dogs still are still a bit confused then speak to polly(sqwark, Pieces of Eight, Pieces of Eight)

Buried Treasure:

Bilge Rats | Games | Marine Technology | Pirates | Grog | Coherent
Most Succesful Pirates | LLoyds List's | Other Ships...


EvilCM

Cookie Monster's last name becomes much more accurate when he is deprived of cookies...
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Today's Featured Article -

Recently featured: Osmosis Jones

Yesterday's Featured Article - Osmosis Jones

Ozzyndrix

Osmosis Jones is a 2001 American live-action/animated buddy cop comedy film with decent animated scenes directed by Tom Sito and Piet Kroon and horrendous live-action scenes directed by the Farrelly Brothers (though the commercials, end credits, and Amazon.com product descriptions outright lie to you and claim the Farrellys were the movie's "main" directors). It centers on Osmosis "Ozzy" Jones, an African-American white blood cell cop who complains that germs are trying to oppress him with viruses and infections, and Drix, a whitebread cold pill straight outta the FDA who is no match for Ozzy's utter hipness and spleenwise attitude. The two must break down the racial cell walls and prevent seductive virus Thrax from killing their host body — slovenly zookeeper and deadbeat dad Frank Detorre — within forty-eight hours. Ultimately, Jones is caught in an intimate triad, and must decide between his best friend Drix, Big Daddy Thrax, and Mayor Shatner's curvaceous secretary Leah.

Osmosis Jones was met with mixed reviews, with critics praising the fun and educational animated portions but criticizing the live-action portions, their degradation of national treasure Bill Murray, and their use of sub-Will Ferrell gross-out humor featuring exploding zits. The film was the second in a string of financial failures by Warner Bros. Feature Animation, hoping to find success at the antipode to The Iron Giant, though it certainly wouldn't be their last multi-million-dollar mistake as Warner continued to struggle with long-term illness and creative decisions indicative of degenerative brain damage from late-stage Rabbititis. (more...)

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What were we getting up too in past years, Arghhhh!

January 20: Nobody edit Uncyclopedia Day Or Else

Too-fuckin-good

Why do I get my Hopes up?

  • 1492 - Columbus becomes president of America.
  • 1937 - The 20th Amendment is passed, forcing all presidental candidates to compete in a 100-meter dash to decide the primaries. Surprisingly, Franklin D. Roosevelt is the first president to win this event.
  • 1942 - The Nazi Party gives the final solution to the "Jewish question", though the Jews insist that they were just asking for directions.
  • 1984 - Armies of Oceania defeat Eurasian armies in the Congo.
  • 1988 - Everybody ignored this holiday.
  • 1992 - Governer Bill Clinton beats Paul Tsongas in the primaries. Investigations as to whether or not Clinton bit part of Tsongas's ear off in the final stretch are launched.
  • 2004 - Pinky and the Brain finally take over the world, and are then killed by Joe Cartoon in a blender.
  • 2007 - People are still intent on ignoring this holiday.
  • 2008 - No-one has edited Uncyclopedia! Until I just did. Oh shit.
  • 2009 - International Change Day. Citizens of the 'Homeless Undead'-ridden Californian cities get a day of reprieve from demands for change as the masses of change-hungry 'Zombos' are distracted by a change of power in Washington
  • 2010 - Some n00b edits Uncyclopedia.
  • 2300 - after leaving earth after 2012, humans finally get to the only safe planet, uranis.
  • 2301 - finally people decide to wipe uranis clean of those mean little stinky brown blobs.

Archived doings

Recent press ganged crew

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UnScripts:The Fresh Prophet Of Bel-Ur | Generation X | Megas XLR (r/w) | Phil Spector (light r/w) (pictured) | Mike Love (light r/w) | Nelly (light r/w) | Edward Hopper | Natalie Portman | Pufferfish | HowTo:Become Green Arrow | Loch Hess Monster | Takeru Kobayashi | HowTo:Survive Arkham Asylum (light r/w) | Captain Planet and the Planeteers (light r/w) | Catholic church (light r/w) | Rape (light r/w) | Racial profiling (light r/w) | Psychology (light r/w) | Gun control (light r/w) | Bat Villains (light r/w) | Silver Age Iron Man | Light Yagami (light r/w) | Michael Clarke Duncan (r/w) | Batman: The Fanfiction | Harley Quinn | Robert Rodriguez (r/w) | Star Wars: The Force Awakens | Gene Simmons (r/w) | Rush (r/w) | KISS (r/w) |


More Recently press-ganged crew | Most wanted pirates | Requested Keel Haulings | Add to stumps | Marooned with nowt but a pistol and one shot | Help out the land-lubbers

Pirate of the Month and Swabbie of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 31,827 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
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