GunZ
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[edit] The Fuck is This Shit?
GunZ (also knows as GunZ and SwordZ) is a dangerous yet addictive hallucinogen that is manufactured by MAIET (which is the company's attempt to spell TEAM). It is usually taken by injection into the veins. Ingredients contained in GunZ include Maplestory, Matrix candies, and trace amounts of OJ Simpson's wife, all of which are liquefied with acid. The drug is unique in that it provides similar hallucinations to all of its consumers. It is also unique because different types provide hallucinations in an exclusive language. GunZ can currently be taken in English, Portuguese, Japanese, Korean, and it affects kittens. Like grues.,and Indian. Those taking the same type of drug at the same time can interact with each other in hallucinations. Elurra is best on GunZ is widely popular worldwide, and over 16000 people on Earth take it daily. Besides hallucinations, symptoms from consuming GunZ include paranoia, cancer, anorexia, obesity, insomnia, bloodshot eyes, Parkinson’s syndrome, profuse sweating, pale skin, sensitivity to the sun, fidgeting, Eily is worst on gunz, arthritis in the fingers, fugliness, short term memory loss, brain atrophy, physical and mental dependence on the drug, confusing hallucinations with real life even if the consumer is not on the drug, and reverse-puberty. GunZ players have been known to develop extraordinary abdominal muscles and amazing good looks, as executing the smallest technique requires the player to have a full-on seizure on the keyboard.
[edit] The Extreme Graphics
The effect that GunZ has on the user is as realistic as of the most games available in stock. It beats Halo 3, Flight Simulator X and Microsoft Word. The size of the graphics alone in GunZ adds up to an eye-popping size of 130KB if compressed into a format readable by computers. However, the amazing experience requires up to 128MB of RAM and 2MB of hard disk space in your head every time you use it. The source of the drug's "real-ness" is the place where you see the "Z" symbol on the top-left, so getting hurt (ie walking into a chair, getting stabbed in the stomach, and scratching the skin off of your own face) may cause more lossy GIF compression.
Caution: This drug's extreme "graphics" may cause one to get confused with real-world and hallucinations. This happens because of the extreme graphics in the game. Setting the graphics to "high" while in the "experience" will allow for a slightly longer time without experiencing this effect. I LOVE PUSSAY!
[edit] The GunZ Cult
Alleged members of the so-called "GunZ" cult have been reported sacrificing babies and eating steel in the hopes of improving their proficiency at GunZ, as well as the time they can hold out during fornication (see image).
[edit] Jo Baba
Jo Baba (not to be confused with Yo Momma), the ultimate three-headed deity composed of Venister the creator, Guntrix the enforcer, and Citizen the penguin. Baba the Great, as he is called in some remote areas of the world, is capable of thinking of three actions at once but capable only of executing one. Baba is considered to be the greatest thing since sliced bread and diced babies. Baba can take three shots of GunZ at the same time.
[edit] Hallucination Types
There are many types of hallucinations that the consumer can experience.
Training: This type of hallucination is intended for the user to get used to the drug. There's absofuckinglutely no point in it, however, as the user will forget everything about it after the effect wears off.
Deathmatch: The user experiences a high-paced battle with transvestites waving large phalluses to show off their sexual prowess.
Team Deathmatch: Two teams of people kill each other while having a massive orgy.
Beserker: Only one person can achieve the highest point of ecstasy, so other people must kill that person to take his/her place. This goes on endlessly until one experiences orgasm.
Gladiator: Originally this hallucination type was intended to be a cooking competition, but consumers were too high to realize that and are forced to mutilate others with various sharp objects.
Team Gladiator: Same as Gladiator, except with rudimentary "teams". Taking GunZ anally and participating in this event is considered a national sport in France.
Assassination: People are split into two teams. One person from each team, marked by a blue or red sexual aura that emanates due to the effects of the drug, has the highest point of pleasure, and the goal is to kill that person on the other team before he/she experiences orgasm.
Quest: Strangest hallucination type. People go in groups of 4 hoping to get into a "large black door". Behind it is a man named "Bubba." His name is always Bubba, regardless of who the user is.
[edit] Conversing With GunZ
Taking GunZ (especially anally) will result in diminished mental functions. The speech of GunZ users is comedic and has a large fan base in the Jewtube community.
- Player 1: " Dude wow your so bad TURTLE LESS!"
- Player 2: "QQ4u gtfo pl0x. ju think im tryin?"
- Player 1: " What you think im trying ?"
- Player 2: "Im not trying your not worth it"
- Player 1: "your a newb you are trying!"
- Player 2: "LOL IM STILL LB... NEWB !!!"
- Player 2: "THATS IT MOFO!!!"
- "Vote kicking for Player 1 has started."
- Player 1: "OMFG you think that I will actually get kicked cause im just rape little children?"
- "Player 1 has been kicked."
[edit] Styles
In GunZ hallucinations, the user is constantly fantasizing about killing others. But the mass of users have determined different styles of fighting. These include:
- Doink Style, named after the infamous Tonberries. Doink Stylers naturally imitate these fugly, fictional creatures.
- Kool Style, the most popular style amongst long-time consumers. Kool Style involves bouncing off of walls and waving your sword and shooting your gun really quickly in hopes of killing someone. Named after Kool-Aid; OH YEAH!
- Erectile Dysfunction Style is used by those who have shrunken penises. Erectile Dysfunction Stylers think they are playing a game of Counter Strike while having hallucinations.
- Win Style - Bannable.
[edit] Forbidden Style
F. Stylers are masters of deceit.
WARNING: If you do not read this section in its entirety, you will be eaten by a grue in 7 days.
As K-style is associated with speed, randomness, glitches and as E-stlye is associated with aim, stealth so is F-style associated with dumbness, laziness & the need to delevel
1) Snail : (Not to be confused with Butterfly)
This is a very basic move in F-style. It can and should be used any time it can.
Press Alt-Tab >> open and sign in on all messenger applications you have >> Press F11
This move basically enables you to lag so bad that no one in the game knows where you actually are (and vice versa). Where they see you will be your position a minute back. It can actually be used as an alternative to the GOD mode cheat. You can actually come out of any game (even a mansion 16 player death match!) with 0 deaths! (psst...and 0 kills)
2) 0th step aka No-step : (Not to be confused with Half step)
This move too is a very important move in F-style. It enables you to aim flawlessly at your opponent.
Press nothing >> I mean it...nothing! >> Absolutely nothing!
Choose a location in your map where most players converge at. Just rush as fast as you can there and use the 0th step. The trick is in the timing of doing nothing. With practice, you will master the 0th step and then you can actually use it just when everyone is just about to pump you with bullets or slash you to oblivion.
3) Cancel the wall : (not to be confused with wall cancel)
This move enables you to see through walls. Mind you though, not all walls can be seen through. Only walls which have another room or playable terrain on the other side.
Open you CPU cabinet >> remove your GeForce/Nvidia graphics card >> Replace with $25 card from Ebay
Now when you play Gunz, you can literally see through all the walls and even ceilings of certain rooms (not counting your body itself, your opponents as well, and ofcourse the trucks, crates etc) Now you can see where your opponent is. Your opponent can see you too...but to your advantage : you are not where you seem (refer Snail move)
Note: Try and ignore the blue walls, green floors and the seeming aurora borealis in the sky
4) Massive Sky jump : (Not to be confused with Massive strike)
This move is based on a discovery a fellow gunzfactorian.
It enables you to jump amazingly high. This can give you a very high point of view on the map. But you need a certain combination of weapons/armor to do this move:
Buy 2 of the best rocket launchers and as many grenades as your level and bounty can buy.
Equip grenade >> Look down >> press LMB (and hold!) >> quickly switch to rocket launcher (your rocket will shoot) (still keep LMB pressed) >> switch to next best rocket launcher (that launcher will shoot too) >> look around
This can also be used to negate the wall climb disadvantage of rockets. Cause now you dont have to climb walls...you go higher than them.
Note: if you still dont see a "Wait for 5 seconds" message...use the 0th step.
Despite the knowledge of the Forbidden Style, no one has ever been able to master it. Worshippers of GunZ believe that the one sheman who will be able to master it will become ruler of the GunZ hallucination universe and lead the users to freedom against Oprah
5) Suicide: (Not to be confused with "Wait for 5 seconds and press Fire!"-Live another life)
This move is to kill yourself purposely.
Type "/suicide" to execute this command.
Doing this will refresh all your ranged weapons and will fill back your ammunition.
This style of attack was created by suicide-bombers.
This will do you good when you don't want the noob to kill you first.
The very useful thing about this style is that your HP (health) and AP will be refreshed totally afterwards.
6) S-Style! Not an actual representation of anything!
The S stands for sex. It basically involves turning off the computer, going out into the street, and raping the first thing that moves. It will instantly equip your offline character with rocket launchers that have 999 damage, 0 reload time, 60 rockets per clip, and 0 weight, allowing you to also equip the launchers as hats, gloves, shirts, pants and boots, letting you spew exploding death-orgasm from all orifices and extremities.
WARNING: If you just read this section, you will be eaten by the grue over your shoulder, no not that one, the other one, never mind its gone.
[edit] External Links
- GunZ Online Official website
- GunZ: IJJI Portal
- Tubgirl
