Gulf War II (video game)

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This article is about chaos and disorder in the Persian Gulf, from 2003 onwards. For information about chaos and disorder in the Gulf of Mexico, please see Hurricane Katrina.


Video Game Wars

WMDSearchsm

In Development

War: ICOUnited States of AmericaICOUnited KingdomICOPolandICOKurdistan vs. ICOIraq

AlSadrGame
Al Sadr pauses briefly from the game to shout obscenities at his opponents.

*Welcome to #Iraq!*


*USA has entered the game*

USA: saddam you fukin hax, u got wmdz

SadDam_da_MAN: hav i fuk

SadDam_da_MAN: rtfm, u fukkin n00b

SadDam_da_MAN: if i had em id’ve used em on u

USA: bullshit you got sum

USA: i know, i sold em 2 u b4

Tony_UK: haha, rumbled. go USA

SadDam_da_MAN: i used em all on kurdish_guy in teh last game

SadDam_da_MAN: i havnt got n e more

USA: ok, just give me sum oil then

SadDam_da_MAN: yea right

SadDam_da_MAN: u tried that shyt b4

*Insp3ct0r_Hans has entered the game*

Insp3ct0r_Hans: sup evry1

Tony_UK: hi hans

Insp3ct0r_Hans: wutz happenin

USA: saddam reckons he aint got no wmdz left

USA: and my names micky mouse

SadDam_da_MAN: fuk off

SadDam_da_MAN: hans look at my inventory

SadDam_da_MAN: tell this dumshyt wat i got

SadDam_da_MAN: go on

Insp3ct0r_Hans: I cant see n e thing

USA: bullshit

USA: look closer

Insp3ct0r_Hans: dude, theres nothing here

Insp3ct0r_Hans: xcept sand

USA: bullshit hes hiding them

Insp3ct0r_Hans: seriously dude

SadDam_da_MAN:LOL

USA:saddam, stfu

USA:lyin shit

SadDam_da_MAN: right hans, get out

Insp3ct0r_Hans: fine, whateva

Insp3ct0r_Hans: u guys r ghey ne way

*Insp3ct0r_Hans has left the game*

SadDam_da_MAN: who looks like a rite dick USA?

Tony_UK: stfu saddam hes right

SadDam_da_MAN: ooh sorry

SadDam_da_MAN: didn’t mean to upset ur boyfriend,LOL

*King_Kofi has entered the game*

King_Kofi: USA leave him alone

SadDam_da_MAN: hahaha

King_Kofi: STFU saddam, no 1 likes u either

King_Kofi: but u will b alright if u don’t fuck with ne1

USA: OMG, kofi who made u GM

King_Kofi: um, every 1 actually

King_Kofi: we took a vote, remember dumshit?

USA: fuck u, i don’t care

*USA has put King_Kofi on ‘Ignore’*

USA: yo blair you with me

Tony_UK: wateva u say, USA

Tony_UK: hey germany u with us?

schroeda': ur nuts

schroeda': me n jacques will sit this 1 out

jacques_napoleon: hes right

Pootyboy: n dont say we didn't warn ya!

USA: pussys

Tony_UK: haha

*USA has attacked SadDam_da_MAN!*

Amerimp
SadDam_da_MAN: wtf, that armors too strng 4 roadside bombs

SadDam_da_MAN:WTF!!?

SadDam_da_MAN: u fukkin h4xx0r

*Tony_UK has attacked SadDam_da_MAN!*

SadDam_da_MAN: omg u fuckin a$$holes

USA: lol, got ur airport u lamerz

*baghdad_bob is no longer idle*

baghdad_bob: bullshit

baghdad_bob: u aint in the airport

baghdad_bob: we still got it

baghdad_bob: all ur troops r ded

baghdad_bob: the rest r running away crying

Tony_UK: u r so full of shit dude

USA: oops there goes another statue

USA:lol

Tony_UK, PM to USA: wtf are you doin with that flag!

USA, PM to Tony_UK:oops

Tony_UK: were in ur base killin ur d00dz

Tony_UK:nice city LOL

baghdad_bob: u lying infidel

baghdad_bob: we r winning

*USA has captured SadDam_da_MAN’s base!*

USA:LOL, mission accomplished, LOL

Tony_UK: yeah

*SadDam_da_MAN has entered hidden mode*

USA:wtf?

Tony_UK: dude this new patch is all screwed up

Tony_UK: i cant use my democracy skill

Tony_UK: u try

USA: hang on

*USA has captured SadDam_da_MAN!*

USA: haha, lam3r

USA: that should settle it

SadDam_da_MAN: fuk u guyz

Fy iceworld css0008

*USA has put SadDam_da_MAN on trial!*

*SadDam_da_MAN has attacked the judge!*

*fundaMENTALIST has entered the game*

fundaMENTALIST: lol, thx u guys

fundaMENTALIST: I got half his stuff now

*4 American Soldiers killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*30 Iraqi civilians killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*1 American Soldiers killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*23 Iraqi civilians killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*6 Iraqi civilians killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*2 American Soldiers killed by Suicide Bomber!*

USA:WTF!?

*24 Iraqi civilians killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*7 Iraqi civilians killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*3 American Soldiers killed by Suicide Bomber!*

fundaMENTALIST: ROFLMAO

*6 Iraqi civilians killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*Western media raise log severity threshold to 3*

*2 American Soldiers killed by Suicide Bomber!*

USA: o shit

*9 American Soldiers killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*American Civilian beheaded on TV!*

*4 American Soldiers killed by Suicide Bomber!*

USA: shit the retreat button aint working

*3 American Soldiers killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*2 British Soldiers killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*American Civilian beheaded on TV!*

USA: why is it greyed out?

*11 American Soldiers killed by Suicide Bomber!*

Tony_UK: mine too

*4 American Soldiers killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*American Civilian beheaded on TV!*

*3 British Soldiers killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*British Civilian beheaded on TV!*

Tony_UK: fuck

*5 American Soldiers killed by Suicide Bomber!*

*Western media raise log severity threshold to 5*

USA: ah thats better

USA: this game sux0rs

Tony_UK: 2 rite. after this I won't get a third term thats for sure

USA: @ least we got oil now

Tony_UK: yeah haha

Tony_UK: gimme sum

*Oil Pipeline takes 33 points damage*

*Oil Pipeline takes 48 points damage*

*Oil Pipeline takes 27 points damage*

fundaMENTALIST: Wheee!

*Oil Pipeline takes 32 points damage*

USA: WTF!

*Oil Pipeline takes 51 points damage*

Tony_UK: fuk!

*Oil Pipeline takes 36 points damage*

*Oil Pipeline takes 12 points damage*

USA: Hey! $$$ 4 hlp!

*BulGARia is no longer idle*

*ITALY is no longer idle*

*Spainster is no longer idle*

ITALY: sup d00ds

USA: hlp plz

Spainster: shur

*Spaniards killed by Suicide Bomber!*

Spainster: OMG! im outta here

*Spainster has left the game*

BulGARia: k

*Rising_sun is no longer idle*

*P0lL0cK is no longer idle*

ITALY: ill hlp 2 4 $

Rising_sun: ill hlp 4 oil

USA: shur

P0lL0cK: lets rock d00dz

USA: aright

fundaMENTALIST: whuts with all these n00bs?

*Foreign diplomats have been taken hostage!*

fundaMENTALIST: lolz u suk!

USA: fuk u that was cheep

Tony_UK: yea!

*British Soldiers killed by American Soldiers!*

jacques_napoleon: look guys i told you this game sux

USA: STFU!!!1!

*al_Sadr has joined the game!*

al_Sadr: USA u r ghey

*al_Sadr has struck USA!*

USA: OMG stop him!

Tony_UK: sorry cant do that

*kurdMAN has joined the game!*

*shite has joined the game!*

*sUNNI has joined the game!*

kurdMAN: yo guys i wanna play 2

shite: USA fuk off this is my g@me

sUNNI: kiss my @ss shite!!!!1!!

USA: OMFG!!!

*I-R-An has entered the game*

I-R-An: oh i wanna play plz?

USA: skr3w u n00b

I-R-An: fine

*I-R-An gives weapons to shite!*

*I-R-An gives weapons to sUNNI!*

*I-R-An gives weapons to kurdMAN!*

*I-R-An gives weapons to fundaMENTALIST!*

I-R-An: weeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

USA: WTF?

I-R-An: this will make game more fuN! ^^

USA: fuk off

*I-R-An has left the game.

USA: crap...

*fundaMENTALIST has blown up a Shiite mosque!***

shite: OMG! thats my place! some1 will pay 4 this!!!!1!

*shite has struck sUNNI!*

*sUNNI has struck shite!*

USA: yo fuckheads STOP IT!!!

jacques_napoleon: U RETARD I TOLD U THIS GAME SUX

USA: STFU!!!

jacques_napoleon: U STFU n00b!!1!

*shite has struck sUNNI!*

*sUNNI has struck shite!*

*shite has struck sUNNI!*

*sUNNI has struck shite!*

USA: fuk!!!

*Entering Civil War mode!*

USA: WTF!!! Who said Civil War??

Tony_UK: this game suxs now im out.

USA: YOU CANT LEAVE n00b!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!

*SadDam_da_MAN has been deleted from the game, with his IP permabanned, by the Iraqi Justice System*

eyeRak1: w00t

USA: T00K J00 LONG ENUF J00 N00B!!!!!!!!!!!!!@@!!!@!!

L-Mal: stfu

*Western Media reports public approval ratings at historical minimum*

Spainster: USA, this is a right mess. stop now yes?

BulGARia: Wld be about time, too

ITALY: yeah, come on stop it

Rising_sun: just accept you lost and move on

USA: stfu you sissies!!!!!

Tony_UK: well, they have a point though, can't we just talk to Iran and ask to stop this shit?

USA: You shut up too bitch!!

*USA loses mid-term elections*

USA: fuk!

USA: er...

USA:

USA: you guys? i had this great idea? I think we need a "new approach" now.

Tony_UK: i quit.

*Tony_UK has left the game*

*FlAsH_GoRdOn has entered the game*

FlAsH_GoRdOn: we're pulling out troops.

USA: u cant, the surge is working

*FlAsH_GoRdOn has left the game*

USA: oh u asshole, gordon

*Turkey has entered the game*

Turkey: you better control those Kurds

*Kurds kill 3 Turkish soldiers*

*Kurds kill 12 Turkish soldiers*

*Kurds kill 8 Turkish soldiers*

*Kurds burn down Turkish village*

USA: i can't lose baghdad

Turkey: you got serious problems

kurdMAN: fuk you dude

Turkey: that's it we're mercy killing you

*Turkey invades Iraq*

USA: nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

*Turkey kills 4 Kurd soldiers*

USA: i hate j00

Turkey: k im bored, off nao

USA: WTF HOW U DO THAT?

Turkey: RTFM n00b

*Turkey has left Iraq*

USA: DAMMIT!

*Dubama has entered the game*

Dubama: Now lets drop your weapons and lets join together to stop world hunger,war, and warming.

*Dubama is now given the control of USA*

*Dubama allow funding for forgein country that allow abortion*

*Dubama closed the Guantanamo Bay detention camp*

*Dubama allow funding for stem cell research*

*Dubama enters #afghanistan server*

*kHr15T;4n_peeP is no longer idle*

kHr15T;4n_peeP: WTF?! J00 cant do dat!!! FVCK J00!!!

*kHr15T;4n_peeP now hate Dubama*

*kHr15T;4n_peeP was muted by 4dMEd;A. Reason: Unrelated to the gulf warz u knoobs!*

USA: fuck this. I'm off to #afghanistan

eyeRak1: wat

eyeRak1: you made this mess, ffs clean it up, n00b

*USA has left the game*

eyeRak1: fuckin westerners

eyeRak1: havent herd the last of me


*No human players left. Entering standby mode. Transferring player resources to #afghanistan*


*** GAME OVER ***
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