Grand Theft Auto: New Zealand

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GTA:NZ

Grand Theft Auto: New Zealand (Aotearoa, in Maori), also known as Grund Thuft Aito, Niw Zieland, is a computer and video game created by Rockstar Games and published by the Catholic Church (USA) in 1997/1998. It is the first in the extremely popular Grand Theft Auto series that has thus far spanned eight standalone games, and one expansion pack for the original.

The game portrays John 'Fail' Key, a once successful MP for the Fail Party, who has been forced out of the party hierarchy. Most of New Zealand seems to want John dead. His only option is to fight back and take it himself(at the expense of the NZ Tax Payer).

Those obsessed with so-called experts should thank their lucky stars that Wikipedia does not have an article about Grand Theft Auto: New Zealand.

[edit] Gameplay/Story

The game kicks off after John has just been investigated by the police and kicked out of the party for corruption. You start doing missions for local South Auckland street gangs, eventually working up to do jobs for the Mongrel Mob, and finally the most powerful criminal organisation in the country-The National Party.

John's early missions include protecting police officers from rape convictions,distributing anti-Green pamphlets at the behest of the Exclusive Brethren and selling hemp for uh, clothing purposes to Helen clarke.

Game activities largely involve carjacking. The player may use various strategies and methods, to break into to vehicles, although by far the preferred method by players is simply brute force (BBQ tongs) and extortion ("If you don't give me your car, I'll read you the Auckland Regional Council's draft annual plan - in full. WITH Appendices"). John can find the draft annual plan in the mailbox of his dingy 350 dollars-a-week-appartment in the Auckland CBD, right at the start of the game, giving him a powerful weapon for the early part of the game.

Once a vehicle is obtained, the player may choose to use the vehicle as one's own, add light bars and dash lights to it or disintegrate it and use the parts to modify one's original car. Players may get rid of a car at any time by giving it to a scrapyard, driving it into the Avon river (for Te Reo), or burning it in Manakau City (for Rubin). Due to the fact that the first option allows the player to be caught by local authorities it is not often practiced.

[edit] Characters

John - John is the main character. Originally a successful MP for Mangere for the Labour Party, a dodgy deal with some illegal immigrants found him framed for corruption, and relegated to being an independent MP. Taito has since become a mercenary and hired gun, willing to take on whatever job the powers that be give him. Nonetheless, he is haunted by a burning desire for revenge against Helen Clark.

Helen - The (EX) Prime Minister of New Zealand and the Don of the Labour Party. Fearing John's popularity, she had him framed for corruption. She later blackmails him into doing odd jobs for the party against his will. She is completely ruthless and shows no compassion, though she has a soft spot for Winston.

Don- Original leader of the National Party, he was character assassinated by John, on orders from his underling Key and Helen. Was rumoured to have some connections with the the exclusive Brethren.

"The Key"- A lieutenant in the National Party gang, a deal with John and Helen sees him manuoevre to the top, removing his old boss, Don. Howver, he proves to be equally ruthless, and by the end of the game, Helen and him are locked in a deadly struggle for the future of the nation.

[edit] Gangs

During the game, John will face various gangs. One of the first gangs faced by the player is the Mongrel Mob, a brutal gang full of the toughest Maoris and Half Castes in New Zealand. They are known for their treacherous gang activity and are a force to be reckoned with. Often seen roaming around with bulldogs and wearing their patches (Except in Wanganui where they're banned). They are enemies of the Black Power though they have some ties. A similar gang is the Black Power, however they are seen more often on bikes, they normally wear black glasses and have dreads. John got in a rakus with them over a Rugby game and they are not too fond of him but currently don't care too much to be bothered.

Other gangs include Exclusive Brethren - A ruthless gang with a vendetta against the Labour Party. John does a few missions for them, including delivering pamphlets smearing Helen Clark.

Asian Yakuza - The Richest gang in NZ, they specialize in Importing Cars and supplying illegal electronics throughout NZ. They get on with most gangs doing deals with them.

Bogan Brotherhood - A small poor gang of Australians who swam to New Zealand in an attempt to impress Jennifer Hawkins, this gang lives in one giant farmhouse that is trashed with VB and Carlton Draught boxes everywhere. Due to the fact of new zealand having shit taste in beer (NO AUSSIE BEER)The bogan brotherhood attempt to make their own beer in a bathtub with skippy the bush kangaroo.

The White Hands - Made up of Uruk Hai leftovers from the filming of the Lord of the Rings movies, these extras were flown in and left here to starve and fend for themselves after principal filming ended. They've since decided to became an actual "gang" and start pushing local businesses for protection money - nobody likes an angry Urukhai hanging around their business.

The All Blacks - The pride of New Zealand their Rugby Union team, one of your major goals is to join this gang.

Head Hunter - A patch wearing gang similar to mongrel mob & black power. actually head hunt. Usually blow themselves up when attempting to throw P labs at stuff.

Killa Bee'z - literally a ruthless & roofless gang of Africanized honey bees, they'll rob you for honey money. Easily killed by a spray of mortein surface spray.

Ngati Pakeha - Mainly made up of Government Employees. They stop at nothing in collecting tax and unpaid Child Suport

D.F.P - Mainly made up of a bunch of brothers from Pakipaki they enjoy gang bangs and smoking lots and lots of marijuana.Often seen in Turks fingering bitches and beating up bois for their smokes and money. Shit at tagging

[edit] Vehicles

Like other Grand Theft Auto series games, the player can drive and hijack numerous vehicles found throughout the countryside of New Zealand.

Nissan Sentra - a smallish car the fbi use because of it's flashing headlights (due too it's crappy electronics) and dashlights

Nizzan Skiline GODZILLA - A Vehicle often driven by the Asians, one of the fastest cars in the game, but currently rare to come across.

'92 Nissan Skyline GTS - One of the many clone vehicles for the bogans. Usually seen in black or white, complete with black/chrome rims and loud exhausts.

Holden Commodore - Fairly common amongst some of the Gangstas, its very crappy, only good for destruction derby mash ups. A aussy classic, though this car is a piece of crap, its pretty much reliable (for 10seconds) and often found all over the Country. The car of choice for the patriot crowd, even though it is designed and made by the Australians.

Holden Commodore 2007 - the car in the game that has police writen backwards on one side (a corrected model is being converted by indian slaves in Tauranga)

Ford Pickup - A Simple Ute for traveling along the country road with heaps of boot space. Whilst this car isn't fast, it can drive nearly everywhere.

Ford Falcon - The best, and fastest reliable car in the game. Also available as a police car & police interceptor. Very good car for blasting away from the black power gangs in there cruddy commodores.

Grizzly Quad Bike - Very limited in numbers, but has secret abilities previously unseen in other GTA titles. Click here for a demonstration.

Harley Davidson - Often found driven by the Hells Angels, loud, obnoxious and unreliable like the riders.

Holden Pickup - Similar to the Ford pick-up except it features back seats making it great for various missions. This is a hated model amongst the Bogan Brotherhood.

Maibatsu EscortPac - A Maibatsu L300 van, capable of transporting up to eight people with space in the back for drugs and weapons as well.

Suzuki Four wheeler - A farm bike used in some of the Farming missions, slow as hell but can drive on most terrain, great for the Ocean Missions.

Suzuki Two Wheeler - A slow but grunty two wheel version of the Four Wheeler, except easier to move and slightly faster.

Subaru Legacy - A perky car highly sought after (stolen), while perky it has a dead spot referred to as VOD or valley of death between turbos. has tendencies to "blow big end bearings"

Shadowfax - The rarest vehicle in the game only accessible to people with one ring of pimping.

Lada Riva - The best car in the game can you believe that it can pull loads of New Zealand birds............................ The Kiwi

[edit] Missions

GTA:NZ follows a non-linear form of gameplay. The player may choose where to begin the game, on either the North Island or the South Island. Once a certain number of missions have been completed, the other island is unlocked, allowing the player to access a totally new set of missions. Many missions are not able to be accessed until both islands have been unlocked. When starting on the North Island, the South Island is unlocked after completing the Aratere Repair mission. On the South Island, the North Island is locked until the Transit Strike mission is completed.

Stewart Island is also included as part of the game and can be accessed while playing the South Island missions..

[edit] Bonus Missions

Throwing some hoops - Unlocked when you met up with Joe. John can recruit a team by getting people off the streets at first and can eventually start up a small place to recruit people(just watch out for tongans).

Truckin' - After you go down to Wanganui you gain the Logging Truck Missions where you have to deliver logs across NZ, pays quite well but takes a while.

Rampage - Hidden mission only in Aramoana, in the South Island. With a four-star felony rating, kill as many pedestrians as possible using an assault rifle in the allotted time limit. You receive an AK-47 Assault Rifle and Body Armour if completed successfully.

Collecting Car Parts - When working with Brendon he tells you there are all these car parts over NZ and if you collect them, he can put together cars and sell them off for you. There are 100 parts in all, and every 10 parts collected unlocks something as follows:

1. Ford Falcon Pickup Turbo
2. Brendon's Tool Kit
3. Turbo Engine
4. Brendon's Garage (He allows you to store a car at his place)
5. 20" Subwoofer and 10" Tweeters, complete with 5 Amplifiers
6. Audio System set ups
7. Mag Selection
8. 20 Litre Supercharged engine
9. Brendon's Auto Repairs Shop
10. Holden Commodore 2007 B.C

Interislander - These missions consist of hijacking a Cook Strait ferry and safely delivering the passengers and cargo while avoiding shipwrecks, boats with Lost stowaways, pirates (especially from Gore), losing cargo overboard to gain points, and rough seas. Not available until both the North and South islands are unlocked.

Wellington Cable Car - This mission simply consists of hitting buttons to drive a tram up and down a hill while collecting fares.

Police Patrol - You drive a police car & you have to arrest and/or waste the bad dudes. However, it gets pretty hard, but you get Titan body armor for completing level 12. Titan body armor is better than the normal body armor.

Drive Helen to The Game - You must drive Helen Clark in a Concrete Truck to the rugby game in time whilst avoiding the police and red tape. Once complete, you get busted.

Tranz Rail - The trains can be hijacked too. Whether it's commuter passenger trains or long haul goods trains, there are several different train missions.

Trolley Buses - A unique form of transportation found in the Wellington area, just watch out for those overhead high-voltage wires.

[edit] Landmarks

Several landmarks exist throughout the game, including some unique ones. One Tree Hill, for example, allows the player to take a chainsaw to the tree. Another landmark is the "Hobbit Town" area and the Rota-Vegas national park. It smells as bad as the name suggests.

[edit] Food and drink

During gameplay, Tiato must eat and drink to replenish energy. There are several supermarkets, including Pak N Sava (spelled "Pakansaahfa", after the Maori word for "Burp") which is the liquor store for the characters in the game. ("Oh god it's so yellow"). The second most popular is Food World, which while it claims to be "First in Food", it isn't in prices. For those quick liquor stops, the most convenient is usually LiquorWorld drive through liquor stores, designed for times when customers are too drunk to leave the vehicle.

[edit] Fast Food

The most common fast food chain in New Zealand is, of course, McDonalds. Georgie Pie, on the other hand, claims to be "Your Favourite Family Restaurant", but most of them have since closed and been converted into McDonalds themselves. Other favorites, such as Kentucky Fried Chicken and Pizza Hut can also be found all over the country.

[edit] Stores

Retail stores allow the player to buy other supplies, such as weapons and drugs. There are no Wal-Marts in New Zealand, so the closest alternative is The Wharehouse. For the cheapest drugs in town, few places beat Uncle Hemi's House

[edit] Radio Stations

The Radio stations have many music to offer featuring bands from NZ and abroad:

The Edge - The official fanboy channel of the guitarist from U2, this is the official radio station of the under 13 year old population of New Zealand. It specialises in whatever music that is making Atlantic Records / EMI / Virgin Records the most cash at the time of playing.

The Metal - The supplier of Hard Rock and Metal throughout the lands with songs from bands such as Blindspot, 8 Foot Sativa, Dawn of Azazel and Metallica. Very popular amongst the Bogan community.

Nuie FM - Featuring the best in the Islanders music, playing tradition Island songs to the latest Tongan Hip Hop.

Da Blok Party - Check out Da Rap Flavourz in NZ's own Rap and Hip Hop station rollin out da dope beats for you and your Cuzzy Bro's. Feature local acts such as Dain Raid and Da Deceptikonz, Scribe, Che Fu & Much more phat beatz.

Kiss FM - For all you crazy people in down under, we introduce you the place to be for all the latest Pop Music!

Newstalk RWL- For people who are so unPC and more Mac and like to say shit and bugger and call in to talk from their arses after listening you will soon get the argue to get some wet 'n' forget ok it's not a music station but still

Le Gran Boroque - A Esquisite Banquet of the most beautiful and Charming Classical Music for all those folks who just want to remember the old days back in Europe.

Core FM - Quite possibly the most popular radio station in GTA:NZ, Core FM is a mixing bowl of local and foreign music.

Boogie FM - If you love the 70's, then this is the station for you! They play disco songs from a variety of groups such as The Bee Gees, Vicki Sue Robinson, The Village People, Dschinghis Khan, Boney M, and more!

Kiwi FM - Plays mainly New Zealand bands, with a little bit of Aussie music mixed in. The most commonly played song is the country's national anthem, Slice of Heaven

Livewire - An experimental station dedicated to creating the Worlds Weakest Broadcasts.

To War With Dreamworks FM - Peter Jacksons personal radio station with 24/7 hate messages against Dreamworks for screwing him off.

Radio Hauraki - Classic rock that rocks.