Gay Numbers
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
“4. 8. 15. 16. 23. 42. Bingo!”
~ Oscar Wilde on Numbers
A mathematical property of numbers which makes some of them gay, even though Mr S White does not find it believable that numbers can be gay. Numbers CAN be homosexual!
The smallest gay number is 5. Then the series runs: 6, 13, 21, 37, ...
The largest known gay number is 1994, which supersedes 1969 as the largest.
3 has a reputation for being gay, but is in fact only slightly queer after a six-pack or two. 54 claims to be "just experimenting."
Oscar Wilde is said to have enjoyed a special relationship with "a number" of people.
Pi is the long time companion of radians. The number e once had an irrational relationship with Pi. but the number 3 kept coming between them.
69 is, however, a very, very gay number.
Infinity is often thought to be gay, but since it is both even and odd at the same time, it is really a hermaphrodite and technically doesn't count.
A homophobic function has the property of mapping any given Gay Number to some other number which is not gay.
[edit] The Kinsey scale
Alfred Kinsey was the first to research gay numbers in 1947 at Indiana University, concluding that:
- 0. is not gay. Nope. Uh-uh. No sir. No way. Never. None of that around here!
- vehemently denies being one, but any port in a storm...
- might be willing to, but likely not.
- is the kind to go both ways and particularly enjoys threesomes and ménages à trois.
- certainly might be willing to try it with enough erotic 4-play. *wink*
- is just plain evil and going to heck...
- is as queer as a three-dollar bill as is its same-sex partner 9. Oh la la! You know what that means! It means that I am going to stick it in someone's butt tonight and get that dick wet!!! I cannot wait for this fuck fest!
