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“Dis be what I'm talkin bout”
“I cranked dat game”
“ Money, money, MONEY!”
“ What have they done to my game?”
Yo Yo Yo! Gather round ma homies cuz I just read in this magazine about a game called Spore Gangsta Edition, made by the creators of Spore Toddler Edition and Redneck spore. It otta make EA lotsa money!
Now don't yall worry bout no challenge, dis game is divided into sevral stages. Now, them stages are there to help them fools who can't play no games. Wid dem, yo can get betta an betta. Der was some deleted stages, like smimmin stage ( yo could swim in the neighborhood pool) drug farm stage (farmin drugs, gotta make that money) and Snoop Dog stage.
In da germ stage yo controw one wee germ and ya gots ta go round a little sink eatin' otha germs o' pondscum. Ta keep yoself from gettin killed, yo gotsa get parts with bucks. Ya get bucks by eatin otha creatures! Parts are including stingas, pinchas, and even zappas! Once yo got yoself enuff bucks, yo can get them legs an' go on land! .Der be dis special, ipod version called Gangsta Spore: Hometown, which has a few extra features and will only give EA some money.
In Dawg stage yo got them legs and yo can make yoself da raddest guy in town. You get rad points by beetin the tar outta otha stuff or makin them yo brothas. If yo got brothas yo can make them yo homies and they'll follow yo round da hood. Yo git parts like mouths that give yo rap ability and hands ta let yo make gang signs. Otha moves incude spit, football tackle, cuss-out, sucka punch, break dance, and bootay shakin'! Once yo rad out them otha dawgs, yo can form a gang. Der be a game called Gangsta Spore Dawgs wid a few extra features dat will give EA a fair amount o money
Now that yo gots yoself a gang, yo gotta wear clothes o' the cops will 'rest yo. Clothes are including hair extensions, gold teeth, and chains. Yo can make yo own hideout ta rest in. Yo goal is ta take ova' tha otha gangs in the city, and ta do that yo can entah gang wars, where yo uses weapons like baseball bats, nives, and even guns! O' yo can do rap-offs with the otha gangs usin instuments like boom boxes, gitars, and micrufones. If the other gangs dont like yo gang enough, yo can give 'em a gift of drugs.
Now that yo gang is tha top in town, go gotta compete with otha hoods. Yo can do this on a' 2 wayz. Yo can have big drug fights where yo sportscars do drive by shoot-ins. Oh yo cand use money to make th' cops take em out fo yo. O yo can become succesful rappas and make em all yo fans. When yo own a hood, yo can custumize it with buildins like warehouses, recordin studios, and burger an hotdawg stands. Yo kin thin paint em with grafiti. Yo can make a rap song in the rap editor! Tha 3 types o' vehicles are sportscar ( yo can pimp out rappa ones with speakers), casino boats, and Drug Lord Helicopters.
Flyin Sauca Stage
Now yo gots yoself a flyin sauca and kin go ta mars an otha planets where you meet otha gangs. To trade "spice" for otha "spice" and if yo is lucky yo will find a "spice" addict to sell it to. Yo will git a job heer dependin on what ya did in ith the otha stages. Jobs are includin mugger, gangster, rapper, Hip-hopper, Graffiti Artist, Smuggler, Drug Dealer,an' Mafia. If yo go ter the center of the galaxy, yo git a special sumtin.
Rumors an' stuff
- Rumer is dat da thing in da center of da galaxy is a never endin cloakin device so yo can steel anithin!!
- If da word on da street is right, Soulja Boy is an unlockable creature!
- If ya are smart enough, yo can find th' mistical Supadrug.
- There was gonna be a realistic matin sequence, but da boss wanted a lower rating for more money.
- This be real I say, I here bout it in Hip-Hop Weekly.
- If yo cant afford no game, bu some pot from our gang, an we'll give it to you for half-price
- If yo cant afford no computer, steal one from a store
- If yo cant steal no computer, then yo ant no gangsta!
- If yo cant afford no life, we'll shoot yo!
- Der be an expansion calle Spore: Ghetto Adventures dat will give EA even more money!
- Dont yall worry bout EA messin with ya, we got them addicted to that Purple Stuff
- Der be dis rumor of a secret White Spice
- Dis game will give EA lotsa money as it costs $799.99
- Commin' ter store January 3, 2011.