From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
|XYZZY||Score: ?||Moves: ?|
But, nothing happens.
But, nothing hap- hey, hold it a minute....
With an incredible lurch, the floor splits apart, and in an awful flash of unholy light a vast, billowing cloud of blood-red smog pours out of the earth!
The towering cloud swirls, and forms an ominous spiral of unearthly chaos. From within the cloud, a thunderous, croaking voice rings out:
"At last! Once again the sun quails before Zizzy the Indestructible! The descendants of the fools who dared imprison me will pay with a thousand times the suffering I have had to endure for all these years!"
As soon as it finishes speaking, the walls and ceiling of the building are consumed in insidious purple flames that burn but give no heat. You look up, and see to your dismay that the sky has turned pitch-black. You start to feel droplets of rain on your skin, and notice to your increasing alarm that the drops are red. The smell of charred flesh reaches your nostrils, as well as distant screams of anguish.
Then, the voice addresses you:
"As for you, fool, your reward is a swift, painless death - a treasure compared to the unending despair I will wreak upon this world!
...But first, try this complimentary Perfect Chocolate Chip Cookie."
True to its word, the cookie has just the right texture and crispness, and the chocolate chips are at exactly the right moistness. The sheer perfection of it it takes your mind off the fact that you are euthanised seconds afterward. Aren't you lucky?