Game:Pick Up the Phone Booth and Aisle/yum

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search

"Mmm! Yum!" you say as you eat all the food in the aisle without stopping to look at what you are eating.

You eat:

  • Chocolate chip cookies
  • Raisins
  • An old lady
  • Your trolley
  • Half of this window, which you upchuck two seconds later
  • The phone booth
  • Salted potato chips
  • Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches
  • Somebody's dog
  • A super mushroom
  • Yoshi

Uh oh! You suddenly remember that you are lactose intolerant, allergic to peanuts, the internet gives you hives, have high cholesterol, unable to digest living things, and Yoshis and raisins combined give you diarrhea.


*** You die of your many food-related illnesses ***


You open your eyes and see that you are in a white room.

"Where am I?" you say. Suddenly, everything turns red, orange, periwinkle, and yellow. "YOU!" a giant voice says, "HAVE COMMITTED ONE OF THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS: GLUTTONY! YOU HAVE ALSO DIGESTED ONE OF THE SEVEN DEADLY SANDWICHES: YOSHI/DOG/SUPER MUSHROOM SANDWICH! GIVE ME BACK THAT SANDWICH!!"

You throw up, and all that stuff comes out. You'd be grossed out, but you're too dead to be grossed out.

"THANK YOU FOR RETURNING IT TO ME!!" the voice said. "NOW GO BACK TO YOUR PITIFUL LIFE, OR AFTERLIFE, OR UNDEAD/LIVING/WHATEVER THINGY!"

After a poof, you are sent back to the aisle. You think about how crazy your shopping excursion has been so far. However, you then realize that a second phone booth is about to fall on your head. In your last two seconds before returning to the big voice, you wonder why you never purchased life insurance.

*** You've eaten yourself to death. Luckily, the big voice is waiting with some good card games. ***


But wait...

You feel a tremendous wrench – the hand of God coming down to wipe clean the temporal chalkboard. The world dissolves, and then quickly floods back into existence, restoring its state as it was before you made your move.

But somehow, things aren't set up exactly the same as last time....

Late Thursday night. You've had a hard day and the last thing you need is this: shopping. Luckily, the place is pretty empty and you're progressing rapidly.

On to the next aisle.

The aisle stretches to the north, and back to the south. The shelves on either side of you block your view of the rest of the supermarket, with only the brightly colored aisle markers visible.

You have stopped your trolley next to the pasta section, bright plastic bags full of pale skin-tone shapes.

There is a brunette woman a few meters ahead, filling her trolley with sauces.

A shiny metal phone booth sits in the center of the aisle.


Your move:

*Secret option!
Super-secret option!
Double super-secret option!

Personal tools
projects