GIMP
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
“ Who the fuck uses GIMP? Doesn't everyone just BitTorrent the superior Photoshop?”
“ You're a GIMP”
~ GIMP on GIMP
GIMP (not to be confused for The Gimp from Pulp Fiction or that famous gimp, Ian Whiley) is the preferred word processor in the public sector, using the BMP file format. Probably one of the most expensive word processors available; so far, only two people have been able to legally acquire the software: nobody and Bill Gates.
Its name is an acronym of "Gnu pIMP", referring both to its open-sourced policy and the program's ability to make money from the images you create with it. The funds raised go directly to Richard Stallman's account in Switzerland.
[edit] History
The GIMP project was initiated after a scholarly discussion on one of his favorite forums:
Someguy posts some Photoshoped picture) RMS: LOL is that for real? Someguy: no dog i made it RMS: how? Someguy: photoshop RMS: is it free software? Someguy: nah RMS: damn it! i wanna put gates in a comical situation!
[edit] Features
Created for the world's best operating system, Windows, the program does complex tasks like opening and closing images with ease. Some tasks, such as editing the image, however, take a lot of time and fuckin' l33t skillz. Due to its speed and efficiency, it only takes 7 hours to open up an image, compared to Photoshop's 0.1 seconds. Once the picture is loaded, it is scaled down and reformatted to fit on a monochromatic 80x24 text console for word and text processing.
While image editing features are not yet implemented, GIMP comes with a Python console to perform advanced text manipulation and snake charming.
