Freedom of speech

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

(Difference between revisions)
Jump to: navigation, search
 
Line 1: Line 1:
  +
=Freedom to Enlighten, Amuse, and Offend=
  +
Freedom of speech and cartoons have gone hand-in-hand since [[Egypt|Egyptians]] use cuneiforms (an early form of writing that use pics of birds and swirly-things) with pictures to depict Pharaohs going overbudget and bungling the construction of yet another pyramid.
  +
  +
==Mmmm, Danish==
  +
In mid 2005, a [[Danish]] newspaper ran a series of cartoons depicting the Prophet [[Muhammad]] in an unflattering light to prove that freedom of speech never ever leads to people overreacting. Some people were offended by these cartoons as, in their particular take on Islam it is bad mojo to depict Muhammad, as it could lead to idolatory. It's even worse to depict [[Charlie Brown]] trying to kick a football.
  +
 
While no one has yet idolized these drawings one guy laughed a little while the rest simply furrowed their previously unfurrowed brows, as most of the comics were, to be polite, either dumb or in very bad taste, or both. Just like Fox News!
 
While no one has yet idolized these drawings one guy laughed a little while the rest simply furrowed their previously unfurrowed brows, as most of the comics were, to be polite, either dumb or in very bad taste, or both. Just like Fox News!
   
 
Various Islamist groups promptly decried the cartoons six months after they were published. To prove that all Muslims are at least a peaceful as Crusade-era Christians, they decided to attempt reconcilliation with the Danish (and, by extension, the "west") by burning shit up and generally just making asses of themselves. Remarkably in this they resemble a well armed frat house ("Go Delta Pi Omega! Death to the infidels!") on frosh week.
 
Various Islamist groups promptly decried the cartoons six months after they were published. To prove that all Muslims are at least a peaceful as Crusade-era Christians, they decided to attempt reconcilliation with the Danish (and, by extension, the "west") by burning shit up and generally just making asses of themselves. Remarkably in this they resemble a well armed frat house ("Go Delta Pi Omega! Death to the infidels!") on frosh week.
   
Salman Rushdie is glad that no one notices him anymore.
+
Salman Rushdie is said to be glad that he was, in no way, involved.
 
   
 
===Peace, Love and Understanding===
 
===Peace, Love and Understanding===
 
People from [[Denmark]] have attempted to put out the fires by publishing a new cartoon.
 
People from [[Denmark]] have attempted to put out the fires by publishing a new cartoon.
[[Image:teddybearprophet.png|thumb|right|The Danes Attempt Reconcilliation.]]
+
[[Image:teddybearprophet.png|thumb|center|The Danes Attempt Reconcilliation.]]
 
This has unfortunately stoked the flames even further, as paper from Denmark is widely known to be by far the most burnable paper on Earth. In this it is similar to the American Flag.
 
This has unfortunately stoked the flames even further, as paper from Denmark is widely known to be by far the most burnable paper on Earth. In this it is similar to the American Flag.
   
Line 14: Line 20:
 
[[Image:2prophets1.png|thumb|left|buddha chillin']]
 
[[Image:2prophets1.png|thumb|left|buddha chillin']]
 
[[Image:2prophets2.png|thumb|right|burqa]]
 
[[Image:2prophets2.png|thumb|right|burqa]]
 
 
 
 
   
 
Interpreters and misinterpreters of the Koran have seen (or at least been told of) other comics that may or may not deserve some form of Fatwa advocating the spanking of the infidels involved.
 
Interpreters and misinterpreters of the Koran have seen (or at least been told of) other comics that may or may not deserve some form of Fatwa advocating the spanking of the infidels involved.
 
[[Image:backofhead.png|thumb|center|three guesses as to who this is]]
 
[[Image:backofhead.png|thumb|center|three guesses as to who this is]]
 
   
 
Just to be safe they're leaning toward spanking.
 
Just to be safe they're leaning toward spanking.
Line 40: Line 41:
 
[[Image:limpfsm.png|thumb|left|Would you let these noodly appendages touch you?]]
 
[[Image:limpfsm.png|thumb|left|Would you let these noodly appendages touch you?]]
 
People who have been touched by His Noodly Appendage, the followers of the [[fsm|Flying Spaghetti Monster]] are outraged at a drawing of Him as limp, undercooked pasta with unappetizing balls of meat.
 
People who have been touched by His Noodly Appendage, the followers of the [[fsm|Flying Spaghetti Monster]] are outraged at a drawing of Him as limp, undercooked pasta with unappetizing balls of meat.
 
   
 
=Even the Non-Religious Are Easy to Offend=
 
=Even the Non-Religious Are Easy to Offend=

Revision as of 04:43, February 23, 2006

Freedom to Enlighten, Amuse, and Offend

Freedom of speech and cartoons have gone hand-in-hand since Egyptians use cuneiforms (an early form of writing that use pics of birds and swirly-things) with pictures to depict Pharaohs going overbudget and bungling the construction of yet another pyramid.

Mmmm, Danish

In mid 2005, a Danish newspaper ran a series of cartoons depicting the Prophet Muhammad in an unflattering light to prove that freedom of speech never ever leads to people overreacting. Some people were offended by these cartoons as, in their particular take on Islam it is bad mojo to depict Muhammad, as it could lead to idolatory. It's even worse to depict Charlie Brown trying to kick a football.

While no one has yet idolized these drawings one guy laughed a little while the rest simply furrowed their previously unfurrowed brows, as most of the comics were, to be polite, either dumb or in very bad taste, or both. Just like Fox News!

Various Islamist groups promptly decried the cartoons six months after they were published. To prove that all Muslims are at least a peaceful as Crusade-era Christians, they decided to attempt reconcilliation with the Danish (and, by extension, the "west") by burning shit up and generally just making asses of themselves. Remarkably in this they resemble a well armed frat house ("Go Delta Pi Omega! Death to the infidels!") on frosh week.

Salman Rushdie is said to be glad that he was, in no way, involved.

Peace, Love and Understanding

People from Denmark have attempted to put out the fires by publishing a new cartoon.

Teddybearprophet
The Danes Attempt Reconcilliation.

This has unfortunately stoked the flames even further, as paper from Denmark is widely known to be by far the most burnable paper on Earth. In this it is similar to the American Flag.

Can't We All Just Get Along?

Meanwhile in other parts of the world, other cartoons have come out. These new drawing have offended the easily offended, and bored and confused everyone else.

File:2prophets1.png
buddha chillin'

Interpreters and misinterpreters of the Koran have seen (or at least been told of) other comics that may or may not deserve some form of Fatwa advocating the spanking of the infidels involved.

Backofhead
three guesses as to who this is

Just to be safe they're leaning toward spanking.

Just Don't Read the Paper

J.R. Bob Dobbs

After seeing a pic of an unsmiling "Bob" without a pipe members of the [Church of the SubGenious] are said to be mildly chafed.

Vishnu

Even the Hare Krishna haven't been spared from this vicious cycle of the repeated publishing of poor drawn (and more poorly thought out) cartoons.

Visnuglasses
Vishnu 2.0

The normally peaceful Krishnas have rioted in airports worldwide, using the power of lentils and their skinny arms to wack passing travelers on the head with their tamborines, over the following cartoon of Vishnu with a stick body, comedy moustache glasses, and a rabbit for a hat.

If you are planning to go an airport, beware. Their attacks have caused at least one innocent bystander's glasses to be knocked crooked and, if news reports are to be believed, another to spill a bit of his coffee.

Flying Spaghetti Monster

Limpfsm
Would you let these noodly appendages touch you?

People who have been touched by His Noodly Appendage, the followers of the Flying Spaghetti Monster are outraged at a drawing of Him as limp, undercooked pasta with unappetizing balls of meat.

Even the Non-Religious Are Easy to Offend

Atheists & Agnostics

Of course the Atheists and Agnostics are outraged too.

The Atheists are pissed at the anonymous painter of a blank, white-washed garage wall in Minesota that depicts, in gory detail, their lack of faith in any higher power while the Agnostics are ready for war over a mixed stain of oil and automatic transmission fluid that could be God, or not.

Cartoon on Cartoon Violence

Fat Albert is currently on a hunger strike to protest a cartoon depicting him as a svelt, healthy man.

It's unknown at this time if any or all of the "Cosby Kids" support him in this, yet another whacky adventure. It is known, however, that their North American tour has been suspended, pending either a successful end to the hunger strike or a return to the 1970's.

In Soviet Russia, Riot Incites You!!

Citizens of the former Soviet Union would be rioting over paintings of an unmustachioed Stalin and Lenin with a wicked Afro, but they have more important things to worry about - like the possibility of an undead Lenin rising from his tomb and going apeshit on the Kremlin, as he said he'd do if Communism ever failed.

Personal tools
projects