Free running

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For the religious among us who choose to believe lies, the self-proclaimed experts at Wikipedia have an article about Free running.
Squirle free running

A typical free runner.

Free running is the act of running aimlessly about a city or urban area. Free runners are often seen doing cool tricks randomly and for no reason. Free runners are typical associated with high school dropouts however, guitar players are often the majority of free runners as it makes great music videos! However these are not the only people who are free runners, in fact, many people such as: hot chicks, collage drop outs, movie stars, nobodys who don't have a life, animals and even normal people like you can and do free run! There's not even an age limit!

edit History


Teenagers practicing urban parkour.

Free running originated from parkour in which one gets from one point to another in the most difficult and painful way possibal, and yet still the shortest rout. One day a traceur (one who practices the practice of parkourage) decided to apply the concept to moving about freely and found it to be amazing fun (with the exception of the police getting mad at you and them throwing death-donuts at you). This traceur (whose name is known only to those who practice free running, and since I know not which of you are or are not free runners I cannot tell you) quit parkour which urged his fellow traceurs to eat his nineteen pet rabbits. They chased after him and his new ability to run aimlessly about the city allowed him to lose them in seconds due to the fact that his chasers had very large afro's that weighed the equivilant of a pick-up truck, resulting in not being able to keep up. And as the traceurs could only go in difficult straight lines where as the free runner could go in random places and with contemporary style, he lost them in a matter of days. Although unfortunatly after the free-runner guy lost his chasers, he was soon eatin by a one eyed one horned flying purple people eater. Resulting in the end, of parkourage. now, forever. But however in the last 17.231 minutes parkour is once again becoming a world-wide phenominon. In fact it has become so popular that it's been reported by several witnesses that there have been turtles, dressed as ninjas, seen running through the streets of L.A. Now noone knows where theyr from or how they got here. but one things for certain..........theyr really cool.

edit How to start


It's as easy 1-2-3!

Starting free running is simple just slip on your shoes, get off your computer and walk out that door. Then once your out there just run around! jump and a run around on roof tops a little do some vaults then throw in some back flips off of high places and your set! Its that simple! Then you can make up your own tricks as you get better. And make sure you meet up with other free runs and they can give you some ideas on how to run more aimlessly and show you how to find more dangerous routs.

edit Injuries

Free runners have been found to be immune from all sickness and burnt potato peelings and suffer only from minor injuries and broken car mufflers. while free running the, runner may suffer from things such as: bruises, cuts, scrapes, road burn, broken bones, concussion, pneumonia, death, polar bears, over exposure to nuclear radiation, monkeys with aids, and raining man-pies. Quite obviously a very safe sport! So get out there and have fun! Free run!


Just remember, don't take it too far.

But, it is highly recomended by experts that you do not fart whe free-running. Their reasoning is that when you fart, you laugh. And when you laugh, you laugh even more, resulting in continuous fartage, and you die. So don't fart. For your own benefit and the benefit of others too. Why others you may ask? Ahem..well you may not know this but plants have feelings too, ya know.

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