Free Epilepsy Test

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

(Difference between revisions)
Jump to: navigation, search
(Replaced page with 'Roman Dog Bird is fat')
m (Reverted edit(s) of Page blanking troll 3 (talk) to last version by 74.43.156.98)
Line 1: Line 1:
Roman Dog Bird is fat
+
'''As part of [[Uncyclopedia]]'s commitment to good health and well being, apart from the bi-annual ''Uncyclopedia Health Fair and Possum Roast'', a series of medical tests are being provided free to any and all who seek the most up to date Unmedical advice and diagnosis to date.'''
  +
  +
You may be asking yourself ''"[[I don't get it|who am I and what am I doing here]]."''
  +
  +
Well, by visiting this article, you have indicated to the Unschooled, Unlicensed and Unregistered [[Uncyclopedia]] [[witchcraft|Unmedical]] [[bra|Unfoundation]] that a self-directed '''Free Epilepsy Test''' is in order.
  +
  +
Before proceeding, please read the mandatory small print section. Failing to do this may [[KDY OMTZUH HUMF|fuck you up]] as nothing else in life is capable of doing.
  +
  +
==Fine Print==
  +
<small font>En désirant cette épreuve, vous convenez que vous pouvez être l'Hypocondrie ou dans le besoin de traitements médicaux réels, n'importe quel vous reçoit l'attention dont vous mourez d'envie. Vous convenez aussi que vous l'avez lu et avez été avertis que la Non encyclopédie Non scolarisée, Non agréée et Non enregistrée la Non fondation Non médicale est tenue pas méchant tant pour votre moi la manie incitée, que pour n'importe quel dommage réel ou imaginé qui peut s'ensuivre dans la prise de cette épreuve. Vous comprenez aussi que si vous sentez l'incendie de toast, vous pourriez brûler votre maisonsmall </small font>
  +
  +
==What to Expect==
  +
  +
In a moment you will be asked to [[Dead Sea Scrolls|scroll]] down until you see a [[static]] image on the [[computer]] screen. Once you see the image, please move your head forward to the point where your [[nose]] touches the screen, and watch the image for an good ten seconds or so. If at anytime during this you get a [[Heavy metal|metallic]] taste in your mouth, this is a good indication that something is [[afro|awry]].
  +
  +
You may begin scrolling....
  +
<br>
  +
<br>
  +
<br>
  +
<br>
  +
<br>
  +
<br>
  +
<br>
  +
  +
<center>[[Image:Freetest.gif]][[Image:Freetest.gif]][[Image:Freetest.gif]][[Image:Freetest.gif]][[Image:Freetest.gif]]</center>
  +
  +
  +
==Judging Your Results==
  +
  +
Please choose the best answer that meets your immediate medical needs:
  +
  +
* If you are reading this text, you should have a mother fuck of a headache, but you are not an epileptic.
  +
  +
* If you are not reading this text, but have gone rigid and choked on you tongue, then in fact you should seek the advice of qualified doctor.
  +
  +
* If you are reading this text, but are sure that you still see something [[That Television Show With Blinking Lights Where People Talk Really Loudly!!!|blinking]] very rapidly on the screen, there is a 99.9% chance that you are suffering from the most aggressive form of [[brain]] [[cancer]] ever detected in [[Decapitation Disease|laboratory rats]], and have 30 seconds to live.
  +
  +
In either event, good health you, and thank you for coming round.
  +
wwwwwwwwoooooooooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww haha this is awesome!!!!!! mcnuggets 97
  +
  +
==See Also==
  +
  +
* [[Retard|Is Your Child a Dip?]]
  +
* [[Birth]]
  +
* [[Death]]
  +
* [[Medical technologist]]
  +
* [[Phlebotomist]]
  +
* [[Quack|Physician]]
  +
* [[Medical Malpractice]]
  +
  +
[[Category:Doctors]]
  +
[[Category:Medicine]]
  +
[[Category:Drugs]][[Category:Supervillains]] [[Category:Occupations]]
  +
  +
[[cs:Lékař]]
  +
[[de:Arzt]]
  +
[[pl:Lekarz]]
  +
if you have epilepsy you just had a seizure... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Revision as of 06:13, January 14, 2012

As part of Uncyclopedia's commitment to good health and well being, apart from the bi-annual Uncyclopedia Health Fair and Possum Roast, a series of medical tests are being provided free to any and all who seek the most up to date Unmedical advice and diagnosis to date.

You may be asking yourself "who am I and what am I doing here."

Well, by visiting this article, you have indicated to the Unschooled, Unlicensed and Unregistered Uncyclopedia Unmedical Unfoundation that a self-directed Free Epilepsy Test is in order.

Before proceeding, please read the mandatory small print section. Failing to do this may fuck you up as nothing else in life is capable of doing.

Fine Print

En désirant cette épreuve, vous convenez que vous pouvez être l'Hypocondrie ou dans le besoin de traitements médicaux réels, n'importe quel vous reçoit l'attention dont vous mourez d'envie. Vous convenez aussi que vous l'avez lu et avez été avertis que la Non encyclopédie Non scolarisée, Non agréée et Non enregistrée la Non fondation Non médicale est tenue pas méchant tant pour votre moi la manie incitée, que pour n'importe quel dommage réel ou imaginé qui peut s'ensuivre dans la prise de cette épreuve. Vous comprenez aussi que si vous sentez l'incendie de toast, vous pourriez brûler votre maisonsmall

What to Expect

In a moment you will be asked to scroll down until you see a static image on the computer screen. Once you see the image, please move your head forward to the point where your nose touches the screen, and watch the image for an good ten seconds or so. If at anytime during this you get a metallic taste in your mouth, this is a good indication that something is awry.

You may begin scrolling....






FreetestFreetestFreetestFreetestFreetest


Judging Your Results

Please choose the best answer that meets your immediate medical needs:

  • If you are reading this text, you should have a mother fuck of a headache, but you are not an epileptic.
  • If you are not reading this text, but have gone rigid and choked on you tongue, then in fact you should seek the advice of qualified doctor.
  • If you are reading this text, but are sure that you still see something blinking very rapidly on the screen, there is a 99.9% chance that you are suffering from the most aggressive form of brain cancer ever detected in laboratory rats, and have 30 seconds to live.

In either event, good health you, and thank you for coming round. wwwwwwwwoooooooooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww haha this is awesome!!!!!! mcnuggets 97

See Also

if you have epilepsy you just had a seizure... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Personal tools
In other languages
projects