Free Epilepsy Test

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As part of Uncyclopedia's commitment to good health and well being, apart from the bi-annual Uncyclopedia Health Fair and Possum Roast, a series of medical tests are being provided free to any and all who seek the most up to date Unmedical advice and diagnosis to date.

You may be asking yourself "who am I and what am I doing here."

Well, by visiting this article, you have indicated to the Unschooled, Unlicensed and Unregistered Uncyclopedia Unmedical Unfoundation that a self-directed Free Epilepsy Test is in order.

Before proceeding, please read the mandatory small print section. Failing to do this may fuck you up as nothing else in life is capable of doing.

By wishing this test, you agree that you may be hypochondriac or in need of real medical treatments, any you receive the attention of which you are craving. You also agree that you have read it and been warned that the Non-Encyclopedia Non-Enrolled, Unregistered and Unregistered Non-Medical Non-Foundation is held not bad for both your self incited mania, and for any real damage Or imagined that may ensue in the taking of this test. You also understand that if you smell the toast fire, you could burn your housesmall </ small font>

edit What to Expect

In a moment you will be asked to scroll down until you see a static image on the computer screen. Once you see the image, please move your head forward to the point where your nose touches the screen, and watch the image for an good ten seconds or so. If at anytime during this you get a metallic taste in your mouth, this is a good indication that something is awry.

You may begin scrolling....


edit Judging Your Results

Please choose the best answer that meets your immediate medical needs:

  • If you are reading this text, you should have a mother fuck of a headache, but you are not an epileptic.
  • If you are not reading this text, but have gone rigid and choked on you tongue, then in fact you should seek the advice of qualified doctor.
  • If you are reading this text, but are sure that you still see something blinking very rapidly on the screen, there is a 99.9% chance that you are suffering from the most aggressive form of brain cancer ever detected in laboratory rats, and have 30 seconds to live.

In either event, good health you, and thank you for coming round.

edit See Also

if you have epilepsy you just had a seizure... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

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