Forum:We need publicity and sponsors to save Uncyclopedia

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Forums: Index > Village Dump > We need publicity and sponsors to save Uncyclopedia
Note: This topic has been unedited for 1879 days. It is considered archived - the discussion is over. Do not add to unless it really needs a response.

We all know the problem at hand. According to Forum:Nothing's happening, Uncylopedia's activity is falling into a hole. We can't let Uncyclopedia be forgotten. We need publicity to attract the internet working force to our site! We need sponsors to spread the word about us! Wikipedia has approximately 3 million articles of misinformation we need to correct on our site. If we ever want to stop this site from closing, we need ads, sponsors, and publicity of any kind. Please, we've come such a long way.-Almost Sir Random Crap

Maybe we can get Michael Phelps to model for our box covers? --Pleb SYNDROME CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!) 16:54, October 3, 2009 (UTC)
PhelpsCrackers

I'll make you sick of something other than Uncyclopedia! ~ Michael Phelps

People coming here will just make it worse! Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 16:55, October 3, 2009 (UTC)
Don't desperate times call for desperate mesures, though?-Almost Sir Random Crap
So, what you're saying is we've dug a hole and the solution is to give shovels to more people? Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 16:57, October 3, 2009 (UTC)
I say we should take this chance to delete everything from the site. We need less, not more. MegaPleb Dexter111344 Complain here 16:59, October 3, 2009 (UTC)
If we did, you will lose all your precious wizard-related pages, Dexter.-Almost Sir Random Crap
No. They're protected through fucking magic. MegaPleb Dexter111344 Complain here 17:03, October 3, 2009 (UTC)
Tell that to the Recycle Bin of Deleted Mediocre Wiki Humor. Can someone make a poll?-Almost Sir Random Crap
Sure. Here's a poll. --Pleb SYNDROME CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!) 17:19, October 3, 2009 (UTC)
I created Template:Bookmark. For social network whores. But it doesn't seem to work on any article with a space in its name --Sir General Minister G5 FIYC UPotM [Y] #21 F@H KUN 07:59, October 4, 2009 (UTC)
Everybody doesn't know this. I never heard about it except that some of us went back to school after summer vacation so don't have as much free time. And if you get sponsors then there'll be ads. How will ads bring in more people? Dame Pleb Com. Miley Spears (talk) 02:06, October 6, 2009 (UTC)
Uncyclopedia does not to look for more editors! At least not in my opinion. If you think Uncyclopedia isn't getting new people signing up, you might want to look at http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Special:Log/newusers. In the past day or two, I've welcomed 42 new users, all of whom joined in the past few days. Many other people have been welcoming too, but there's many that still need to be welcomed. In fact, from 21:02, September 28, 2009 to the time of this posting, 500 people have signed up to edit! Please, anyone who reads this, feel free to sign up at Uncyclopedia:Welcoming Committee and help welcome the noobs! WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 04:31, October 8, 2009 (UTC)
There are actually 1,627,292 registered users, of those 1,428 made an edit in the last 30 days. There is alot of registering without any edits. --Mn-z 05:11, October 8, 2009 (UTC)
Thanks for providing the numbers. All the more evidence that we don't need to advertise to bring in more editors. Our efforts might be better focused on encouraging the ones we have. (And by the way, how do you call up those numbers?) WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 05:36, October 8, 2009 (UTC)
Special:Statistics Btw, alot of people who register don't even make a single edit for some reason. --Mn-z 06:16, October 8, 2009 (UTC)
Uncyclopedians are chronically obese. The "simple" act of registering makes them break out in fat sweat. Then they get sleepy. Or so I've heard. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 06:42, October 8, 2009 (UTC)
You heard wrong. ;) Dame Pleb Com. Miley Spears (talk) 00:17, October 9, 2009 (UTC)
Hardly. It's a fact. Ask an Uncyclopedian to describe their feet. They can't. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 02:35, October 9, 2009 (UTC)
I'll have you know I am not over my recommended weight for my age, sex and height. At least not in zero gravity. WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 02:30, October 9, 2009 (UTC)
But you're still well over the recommended width. You know how you get a wedgie every time you sit down on an airplane? That's the armrest. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 02:35, October 9, 2009 (UTC)
And here I thought that was your arm touching me. Sorry for continually slapping you. WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 02:38, October 9, 2009 (UTC)
Mfff. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 02:49, October 9, 2009 (UTC)
What are you thinking right now as you vote on this poll?
 
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The poll was created at 17:32 on October 3, 2009, and so far 36 people voted.

Seriously

Do we want sponsors or don't we?-Almost Sir Random Crap

No, we don't want sponsors. And "nothing's happening" because it's a busy time of year. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 17:39, October 3, 2009 (UTC)
Well, we know all that. But we need some kind of pipe to the real-world internet, you know?-Almost Sir Random Crap
Ok, tell you what. You go get the sponsors, and we'll be over here doing nothing. Good luck! - T.L.B. Baloon WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 18:32, Oct 3
Hey, is this the 'doing nothing' section? I heard that was where the cool kids were at. --UU - natter UU Manhole 21:20, Oct 3
Well we could have sponsors but the worst that could happen is that News Corp sponsors us then buys us out the parent company of Fox News, and then we become more like Conservapedia or the Stephen Colbert Wiki. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 16:23, October 5, 2009 (UTC)
So, are we going to get paid for doing nothing? ~Jewriken.GIF 17:24, October 5, 2009 (UTC)
You and I have no say in the matter. Apparently, we've left the site. Rabbi Techno Icons-flag-gb kvetch Icon rabbi Contribs Foxicon FOXES 18:41, October 6, 2009 (UTC)
When did you two leave? I didn't know that. Anyway we need to come up with a workable business plan before we can get paid. Something to do with making sponsors give us money to write articles or give us money not to write any more articles. I am going with the later, as my articles tend to offend and annoy people. If I keep it up, eventually I'd get an offer to get paid to stop writing articles and then I can retire and earn my money for nothing, and chicks for free, on my MTV. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 04:30, October 7, 2009 (UTC)

You know what we really need?

A printed version of the best of Uncyclopedia. A coffee table book or somesuch. Why don't you get on that as well. Also, we should totally, like, ban IPs from editing. -OptyC Sucks! Icons-flag-us CUN20:56, 3 Oct

Our license is strictly non-profit, but that sounds like a good way to pay PLS winners and independent hosting. --Pleb SYNDROME CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!) 22:15, October 3, 2009 (UTC)
Why is OptyC so damn sexy?
 
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The poll was created at 21:00 on October 3, 2009, and so far 31 people voted.

What we actually need

Is to write shit so awesome it goes fucking viral. Like H1N1. That is the promotion we're looking for. Tinymasaru.gifpillow talk 18:21, October 6, 2009 (UTC)

Why don't you get drunk and try writing something again? Or, do we have any in-jokes that could go viral on 4chan? --Mn-z 18:35, October 6, 2009 (UTC)
Maybe we could come up with Oscar Wilde pictures that have witty captions? Colin Explode fireALL YOUR BASEExplode fireHeaney! Casa Bey Superfly Portfolio 19:15, October 6, 2009 (UTC)
Go for it. Feel free to let me know what you come up with. WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 05:30, October 13, 2009 (UTC)
The H1N1 Virus is boring, the HINI virus is funny. Jay Leno showed that tonight on his show as some typesetter typed up the H1N1 Virus as I's instead of 1's to make HINI or Hinie a slang word for the butt. We can say the HINI virus is deadly because it makes people's butts too big and then they die of embarrassment for having big butts so big they cannot get clothes to fit or fit through doorways. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 04:03, October 13, 2009 (UTC)

Attempts to create viral captionings

Newt Poster --Mn-z 05:38, October 7, 2009 (UTC)

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