Forums: Index > Village Dump > Stepping down as UnNews czar
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Offered with devotion to those deserving saints who stood for truth, justice and the American way--Funnybony Icons-flag-th Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 20:25, Aug 15

After having thought about it for a long, long while, I decided to stop being the UnNews checker and hopefully go back to writing again. It's been a funny 6 months ride, the only downside to it was going and tell someone: "Hey, your article sucks, work on it!" which I really hated to do and well, just didn't do on many occasions. Since I didn't want to leave this job without prior notice and leaving the whole thing in shambles, I created this forum to say I'll stop updating the templates on the 17th, that ought to be enough for the community to decide what should happen. I'll gladly help whoever is the new boss to teach him what he needs to do (if he/she needs it), anyway it's not too complicated at all.

I want to make it clear: This is not a rage quit, I'm not pissed at anyone or anything, and I'll continue writing here! :) This is not a drama queen move either, so don't try and beg me to stay "in post", my decision is final. The templates the new watchdog (or watchbitch) will need are:

Snowflake mini Mattsnow 00:37, August 14, 2012 (UTC)

It's only been six months? Shit, seems like you've been in charge for at least a year longer. Damn good tenure, UnNews was definitely the site's most reliable asset under your rule, and wonderfully drama-free. --Littleboyonly TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK Oldmanonly 05:28, August 14, 2012 (UTC)
write plz. ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) Icons-flag-au 05:31, August 14, 2012 (UTC)
Too sad. All the editors over the last few years were good and I never had a problem with any Unnews editors. Spike was by far the most disciplined and expert at the job. Spike was not adverse to saying, "Hey, your article sucks, work on it!". I hope he or another good editor takes on the task. And I look forward to finally doing a major collab with you on the 9/11 Commission Report article... lets write. Cheers!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 14:05, Aug 15

Matthew the Snowman has seen fit to ask me to consider taking on the task of ruining UnNews all to hell myself. His justification for making this potentially egregious error in judgment is, and I quote, "[I] seem to enjoy UnNews". I tell you this - if that were the way we select a President instead of the way we do now ("You, sir, seem to enjoy public office. Would you consider being President for a while, at least until you rage quit or decide it's just too hard to tell people that their legislation sucks, go work on it") we would probably enjoy prosperity such as the world has never known. However, since I have no stake in UnNews' prosperity, I will choose the low road, and implement a vote, and I will abide by the community's choice. Mind you, like in our national electoral process, I do this - not because it's a system that works, but because it's what we do. Be sure to make up some lame excuse for your decision to even participate in this vote. But just so you know, I AM an incorrigible narcissist, and as such I thrive on lame excuses that say nice things about my idiotic jokes.

--Globaltourniquet GlobalTourniquetUnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 15:21, August 15, 2012 (UTC)

Vote here if you want User:GlobalTourniquet to take over UnNews

Score: 7
  • Symbol for vote For. - Self-vote, with these exhibits as arguments in favor. Plus, I promise to make all your wildest dreams come true (except for the one about the one-eyed hatchet-wielding INS agents). --Globaltourniquet GlobalTourniquetUnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 16:28, August 15, 2012 (UTC)
  • Symbol for vote For.. I have argued in favour of an UnNews czar before so I support GT if he wants this gig. Special thanks to Matt Snow for what he has done over the past year. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 15:36, August 15, 2012 (UTC)
  • Symbol for vote For. User:GlobalTourniquet is a long-time award-winning Uncyclopedian, and is also my favorite astrologer. So, YES!!!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 15:54, Aug 15
  • Symbol for vote For. Snowflake mini Mattsnow 18:13, August 15, 2012 (UTC)
  • Abstain. I would prefer a more informal arrangement where you do shit and there's an unspoken agreement within the Cabal that you manage the said shit on UnNews.--Sycamore (Talk) 19:14, August 15, 2012 (UTC)
    Im not sure I understand this. Is this in support of having the admins approve a vote by the whole community? The community does not need the concent of admins on a decision like this, unless there is some policy I dont know about, or unless I don't understand whats being said here. --ShabiDOO 20:02, August 16, 2012 (UTC)
  • Absfor as per Sycamore. Do as you vote, not vote so you do. --Littleboyonly TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK Oldmanonly 00:10, August 16, 2012 (UTC)
  • Im very much for it. If he can tell people in a friendly and constructive way that things need work, need lots of work, or totally sucks and help them out with it and be balanced when picking features etc... then cool. How about a month long trial or something? --ShabiDOO 20:00, August 16, 2012 (UTC)
  • FOR It doesn't seem to work when there's no Ian Beale. mAttlobster. (hello) 11:26, August 17, 2012 (UTC)
  • Symbol for vote For. Per mattlobster. Sir SockySexy girls Mermaid with dolphin Tired Marilyn Monroe (talk) (stalk)Magnemite Icons-flag-be GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 00:45, 30 August 2012
  • If you do the work, you will be the czar. It's not an elected position. -- Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 01:01, August 30, 2012 (UTC)
  • I don't actually think a czar is necessary, whats so hard about regulars to UnNews deciding what is crap and what is not, and updating the list as they deem fit? ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) Icons-flag-au 07:45, August 30, 2012 (UTC)

Vote here if do NOT want me NOT to do it

Score: 1
  • Symbol against vote Against. I say again that there is no czar of UnNews. And who is GlobalTourniquet? --Hotadmin4u69 [TALK] 15:27 Aug 15 2012
Czar, Editor, Tomato, Tomahto... --Globaltourniquet GlobalTourniquetUnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 15:31, August 15, 2012 (UTC)
Hey Hotadmin, just curious, and in earnest, what are your compelling arguments against a full-time UnNews editor? If they're compelling enough I could be discouraged. Which would be good, maybe, or bad, perhaps, or neutral, I don't know. Or just link me to where (ref. above words "say again") you said them before. Thanks. --Globaltourniquet GlobalTourniquetUnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 19:07, August 15, 2012 (UTC)
Oh, and as for who I am, I was once, years ago, your adoptee (when I was a left testicle, you may recall). Whom you abandoned. But I don't hold grudges, I just remember stuff. --Globaltourniquet GlobalTourniquetUnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 19:09, August 15, 2012 (UTC)
Just so that we don't repeat what was possibly one of the darker days of Uncyclopedian history, here's some literature lest we repeat ourselves. The outcome of the whole debacle was to let "UnNews Czar/Editor" be an unspoken, understood-by-action mantle. Also like five people ragequit. --Littleboyonly TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK Oldmanonly 00:16, August 16, 2012 (UTC)
Fascinating. Thanks for that, TKF. I don't see in that literature how we got from all that hooplah to the job that MattSnow has. I didn't see the conclusion where they said "Do it, Humbucket (or whoever)". Did it happen organically? Personally I do see the need for this job. But this post suggests I was dicking around with the whole vote thing, because like you (and my recent reverted changes to the UnNews main page demonstrate this stance nicely also) I'm with you regarding the whole "Don't vote to do" ethic, rather just do and see if anyone important cries and/or reverts. I really set up the vote because, having only just come back like yesterday, I wanted to sort of gauge the current community UnNews vibe before I made a commitment, even tacitly. Sounds like the vibe is still oscillating a bit. --Globaltourniquet GlobalTourniquetUnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 02:09, August 16, 2012 (UTC)
The conclusions drawn from that debate: Skully quit, Dexter did czar for less than a month than quit, Humbucker quit from the pressure and drama, then UnNews kind of festered for a while until the mantle was assumed organically like it should have always been. Olipro nails it in one of the forums: If you do the work and you notice no one else is doing it, congratulations, you just became UnNews Czar. It isn't voted on, it isn't announced, and it isn't anything more than a janitorial title like Poopsmith. Throw a parade in your userspace and keep up the good work. --Littleboyonly TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK Oldmanonly 06:20, August 16, 2012 (UTC)
All right. I guess my first day of just doing it will be 18 August. I will simply prufreed and tell everyone their articles suck balls and add only my own articles to the recentnews and lead story templates. Now, I can't find crowd control volunteers so I'll forgo the User Space parade, but UnNewsers - be prepared for some gnarly new czaring. Begin countdown to rage quit... now! Rage quit in T minus 3 months and counting... --Globaltourniquet GlobalTourniquetUnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 17:38, August 16, 2012 (UTC)

Automated czar?

Just throwing another option into the ring here. At the present the two templates are manually updated. To create a DPL that adds in the headline of an article that has an UnNews date template on it within a certain timeframe, or picks the 20 or so most recently created ones, and a second to draw in the first few hundred characters of an article and use it as a brief blurb on front page is not a huge undertaking. Lyrithya could knock something off over the course of a day or two, as the only person who understands how DPL works, (because apparently I don't), and fine tune over a week or so. This means that there would be less manual processing required, but also means there would be less manual over viewing of content. Having said that, patrolling changes would allow the patrollers to keep an eye on UnNews created by IPs or newer (non auto-patrolled) users, so much of that side of things could be done as part of our usual roll backer stuff.

Tl;dr version: Automate it.

  • Pros
    • Less labour intensive
    • Someone has to create the DPLs
    • Less likely to have users rage-quit or get "power hungry"
  • Cons
    • Less manual over viewing

                              Puppy's talk page12:55 16 Aug

What about the boring UnNews? A bot won't make the distinction, and if people are not attentive, crap will wind up on the frontpage. I at least had the merit of checking twice a day to counter utter crap. Snowflake mini Mattsnow 03:08, August 16, 2012 (UTC)
Agreed. And why I am on the Symbol for vote For. side of the UnNews EIC question. --Globaltourniquet GlobalTourniquetUnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 03:19, August 16, 2012 (UTC)
Yeah - which is why we'd check it via unpatrolled changes. At the moment most of the "junk" UnNews are from non auto-patrolled users. I'm not saying it's ideal, but it's a possibility.                              Puppy's talk page03:47 16 Aug
So "autopatrolled" - how does it work? Trusted users are assigned the status, so their obviously goes-without-saying great articles are automatically added to the latest news template? --Globaltourniquet GlobalTourniquetUnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 05:01, August 16, 2012 (UTC)
Something along those lines. And by "trusted" we mean generally write decent stuff. (Which you should be added to, btw. Ask an admin.) Ideally anyone who has rollback status should check these regularly. In reality, myself, Frosty, BB, and SPIKE are the few that do. I don't think any admin other than MrN has bothered patrolling for a while, and MrN is mostly absent these days.                               Puppy's talk page05:31 16 Aug
No. Highlighting UnNews and editing the shittier ones require human eyes and human senses of humor, especially since there isn't a vetting process like VFH for quality assurance prior to highlighting. We'd need these eyes to oversee the bot and undo its occasional mistakes, so why not just cut out the middle man and not build a bot. --Littleboyonly TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK Oldmanonly 06:23, August 16, 2012 (UTC)
Not a bot, a DPL. Personally I don't think this is a vote-worthy topic as such. If GT wants to do it, go for it. If nobody is willing to step up to the plate, the DPL is there as a backup. I guess from my perspective I'm not willing to do it, but if no-one is willing to do it, I'd rather build the list.                               Puppy's talk page08:16 16 Aug
I did remove one UnNews article recently on vanity/excessive navelism grounds but otherwise I have let Matt decide on which articles he thinks should go front page/highlight. That goes for anything I write there too for UnNews. --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 06:30, August 16, 2012 (UTC)
I agree with TKG on his No. rap above. Unnews needs a human editor. The best person would be Spike IMO. But if he is not offering or willing to take on the chore, then we should give it to the only person who is qualified and willing: Globaltourniquet GlobalTourniquetUnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer . We will see if he does a good job; if not, then we can make other arrangements. I think the idea of putting a BOT in charge would be great for NORAD or the White House, but on Unnews a BOT only seems to be an option in absence of a qualified human volunteer. Why not give GlobalTourniquet a chance? He's ready and willing. Cheers, everyone!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 17:26, Aug 16

No Czar?

Allow me to paraphrase The Lion King: "Fools! I will be Czar!" --Globaltourniquet GlobalTourniquetUnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 17:40, August 16, 2012 (UTC)

To paraphrase Freud: Sometimes a czar is just a czar.                               Puppy's talk page11:25 16 Aug

No probs

Matt, get back on with your writing. Understand you. Whoever takes over just has to ask Matt to advise them first. The news is a quick moving place... Matt managed to always put things where they are best suited. That's the skill needed for the successor to the editor's throne. Ticklethekeys (talk) 05:14, August 20, 2012 (UTC)

Vote here if you want User:Some bot designed by Lyrithya to take over UnNews

Score: 2

Thanks, Matt

Just wanted to thank you for your service to Unnews. During your tenure, the quality of the site increased dramatically. Sadly, since your recent departure as czar, the quality has alrady begun to erode and has declined rapidly. I no longer contribute, as the articles have become juvenile or just plain stupid. Thanks for a great time and a great job, though, and every success in the future! Weebils (talk) 17:21, September 7, 2012 (UTC) Weebils

Hmmm. I no longer make cookies, because everyone else in the house is making bad cookies. Do you see a problem with this decision? --Globaltourniquet GlobalTourniquetUnAstrologer, UnJournalist, shameless narcissistic America-hating liberal atheist award-winning featured writer 17:48, September 7, 2012 (UTC)
I hope we aren't talking about the quality of the slightly less recent UnNews I contributed. It was my first one, and if nobody else contributes better UnNews, I am threatening to write more of them. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 21:21, September 8, 2012 (UTC)