Onest: I've told you before; get a damn account. It's a bitch conversing with an IP, dagnabit.
Twoth: try Pee Review
Threend; it needs pictures. One or two will do.
Fourst; try sticking to a newsy format, like intro, interview, background, interview, summation, punchline. It doesn't have to follow exactly like that, but trying to fit a story within a format helps to keep it organized and coherent. It also discourages cruft.
I'm thinking of making this a template to save me some time the next time you make an appearance here, asking the same question about a different UnNews article. Seriously though, you're adorable, even though you make me pull out my hair in frustration. SirModusoperandiBoinc! 05:38, 18 May 2007 (UTC)