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Hello everybody. So after over a year of walking around my neighborhood to steal other people's wireless whenever I needed to upload things to the internet I finally fixed my laptop so that I no longer have that problem anymore. This means I can edit Uncyclopedia again! And delete things from Uncyclopedia again! And ban people from Uncyclopedia again! I'm kinda exited. But I'm kinda having a hard time figuring out what's going on. So if everybody important could just fill me in on what's happened over the past two years that would be great. And also have you seen my car, I thought I left it here. -- BrigadierGeneralSirZombiebaron 04:06, September 16, 2010 (UTC)
We got some of those Japanese paper lanterns. I'm sure you noticed them in the entryway. -RAHB 05:09, September 16, 2010 (UTC)
NXWave bought Wikia, Mordillo's in a psychiatric home, e|m|c was an admin for a week but went stir-crazy too, Multiliteralist is the lone voice of reason on this site and has been making a new "I'm leaving" forum every 2 weeks for the past eight months, and One Eyed Jack has gonorrhea. --TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK 06:06, September 16, 2010 (UTC)
I realised I'm Sherlock Holmes with an Jewfro and on a mission to save a beautiful Austrian Princess.--Sycamore(Talk) 22:53, September 16, 2010 (UTC)
I'm new (to you). I'm awesome. You missed this: UN:LEGAL which established firmly that regular contributors get paid 2 bits per pay period. And UN:IC is struggling because, well quite frankly, I'm running it and doing a poor job. Despite that, again; I'm awesome.
Thanks for the updates guys. I'm glad to see that absolutely nothing important seems to have changed since I left, except the URL. I would like to announce here that me and RAHB have decided that October will be "Welcome Back Zombiebaron Month." I don't want to ruin the surprises but believe me when I tell you that there may or may not be fireworks. -- BrigadierGeneralSirZombiebaron 20:25, September 19, 2010 (UTC)
It should be Zombiebaron's Amazing October Jamboree, in honour of "jamboree" being Engish's funnest word. And in honour of October being amazing. And also something else. SirModusoperandiBoinc! 01:16, September 20, 2010 (UTC)
Zombiebaron Fireworks. Also: October is when, for whatever reason, my life revolves around the first couple seasons of Buffy The Vampire Slayer and school. But I'll try to be around for the Zombiebaron-related festivities! - Not particularly sincere, Sir ColinAYBCUNVFHWhoringMore Whoring at22:23, Sunday 19 September 2010 -