Forum:Can I be a poopsmith?

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Note: This topic has been unedited for 1403 days. It is considered archived - the discussion is over. Do not add to unless it really needs a response.

My user name is "Magic man". And I would like to be a poopsmith. I am not a vandal or a spammer, just check for yourself. I have writen a bunch of articles which have been kept. I am a regular for QVFD & VFD. And am part of the grue army. I would just like to help Uncyclopedia that much more by becoming a poopsmith. Thanks.

P.S.

Please nobody call me names, or ban me for puting this up here. It's just a simple yes or no question. --Tophat headless 18:46, October 10, 2010 (UTC)

Short answer: no. Long answer:there's currently no need for another Poopsmith. We'll put you on the short list whenever one of the current three leaves, retires or vanish under misterious circumstances. ~Jewriken.GIF 18:49, October 10, 2010 (UTC)
You're not encouraging him to murder one of them, are you? Because the wording could almost be construed as... *pokes it* ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101010 - 18:52 (UTC)

Well how about an making me an admin(that was a joke, unless you really want to make me an admin. I wouldn't mind)? --Tophat headless 18:56, October 10, 2010 (UTC)

OK, Magic man - following a top secret admin discussion, it's been decided to give you full admin rights. However, this is on a trial basis only. You have one week to work out how to access those admin rights, how to use them and prove to us that you'll be a force for good and not just a total power-crazed fascist like the rest of us. Show us what you can do! Rabbi Techno Icons-flag-gb kvetch Icon rabbi Contribs Foxicon FOXES 15:12, October 11, 2010 (UTC)
I can teach you how to make a Gefilte Fisch instead. ~Jewriken.GIF 19:16, October 10, 2010 (UTC)
Actually, that's not a bad offer. Gefilte Fisch is really handy as a substitute for wallpaper paste, should you be doing a spot of decorating and run out of proper paste. And because it stinks anyway, you'll soon get used to it and the really bad stink when it starts to rot will hardly bother you at all. Rabbi Techno Icons-flag-gb kvetch Icon rabbi Contribs Foxicon FOXES 14:05, October 11, 2010 (UTC)
Ok? --Tophat headless 19:32, October 10, 2010 (UTC)
You can try some of my Surströmming in stead... I'd advise against anything from Spinning Jew Star guy's table, though. Last time, he tried to give me Cholent. *shudders* I spent eight weeks in the ICU for not checking for toxic waste in it before eating... -- DameViktoria Heart_anim.gif Icons-flag-gb - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 21:38, 10 Oct
Actually my favorite food is the haverflaver. --Tophat headless 22:06, October 10, 2010 (UTC)
Are we swapping recipes? Can I share my race's culture's most favorite dish?  Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~ Xkey280 ~  11 Oct 2010 ~ 06:39 (UTC)
I was thinking of stopping being semi-official poopsmith. But only on the condition that I can have a Scarface showdown with the community. I wouldn't mind pumping a few rounds into sannse, and few of the other female Uncyclopdians along with reciting some of those classic lines.--Sycamore (Talk) 08:26, October 11, 2010 (UTC)
Sounds good to me! What's every one else think? --Tophat headless 13:57, October 11, 2010 (UTC)
Maybe you could write an article instead.--Sycamore (Talk) 14:28, October 11, 2010 (UTC)
Writing articles does have an unfortunate side effect of generally taking actual effort, though... ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101011 - 14:53 (UTC)

To RabbiTechno:

I'm not shure if you were joking but I know that you have to click the delete tab at the top. But here's the thing: I don't have that tab. Again were you joking? Because if you were I think that sounds like a good idea to me (the giving me trial thing). And if you wern't joking: maby my my powers haven't kicked in? I don't know. Thanks --Tophat headless 17:34, October 11, 2010 (UTC)
Oh, maby I have to ask another admin to give me my powers? If so this is me asking you. --Tophat headless 17:41, October 11, 2010 (UTC)
I think Rabbi may have been fucking with you, so don't count on it. I can't stand to see a sincere newbie waiting for his admin powers, hour after hour, standing in the rain, so I wanted to tell you. I can break the news gently, like this, telling you things nobody else will tell you. I am a priest you know, and if you need last rights just leave your request on my talk page and I'll get around to it in a week or so. Alright, nuff said, rounds to make to sooth the dying and all that. Aleister 18:14 11 10
Damn you! :-) Rabbi Techno Icons-flag-gb kvetch Icon rabbi Contribs Foxicon FOXES 16:55, October 13, 2010 (UTC)
Damit... now I'm kinda angry. --Tophat headless 18:48, October 11, 2010 (UTC)

Beavis-fire --Beavis & Butthead 19:07, October 11, 2010 (UTC)

Well thank you Mr. Beavis & Butthead... for that interesting addition to this conversation. --Tophat headless 19:23, October 11, 2010 (UTC)

I want to contribute

<insert name here> - where is he now? -- Style Oranssiviiva Guide 20:15, October 11, 2010 (UTC)

Lionel Richie

Can I be a 'Lionel Ritchie'. I'm not a vandal or a murderer or anything. I just want to dance on a ceiling - any ceiling - doesn't even have to be a clean ceiling. Oh fuck off then. mAttlobster. (hello) 20:48, October 11, 2010 (UTC)


The all-caps-and-vertical-bars vandal

Ya know, last night after the the all-caps-and-vertical-bars vandal was banned, I was talking to Aleister. And he pointed some thing out, two things to be exact. First he said this: "Nice Work! At reverting this jerk, talk to you after an admin finally shows up to ban him. They should have made you an admin for a day, you would have caught the guy early, now he's on like a hundred pages or more. Again, nice work." Really look at that part that's bold. It says: They should have made you an admin for a day, you would have caught the guy early, now he's on like a hundred pages or more. And it's true I would have caught him/her early. also he said: "this points out a huge hole in the system". And it does to, you said that there was no need for a new poopsmith or admin. But this shows there is kinda a need for one. Just saying. --Tophat headless 22:33, October 12, 2010 (UTC)

Nope. Vandal sprees are easily fixable even after the fact, also, you're too new at this to become admin, anyway. Also, poopsmiths change nothing about vandals, they just archive the data on BP and QVFD after the issue is resolved.--HM (T) 01:27, October 13, 2010 (UTC)
Hello, and it was great work on that vandal. You did very well, and this one took a long time to fix because the spree went on for almost two hours (probably less but it seemed so). My comment about if you were an admin you would have stopped him was both a play on your attempt to become an instant-admin earlier that day and the fact that if you had admin powers you would have banned the guy at first blanking. Doesn't mean you in particular should be an admin, just that one hadn't shown up to ban the guy and stop the attack. You did good, and earned a ninjastar for sure. That was it though, an admin is a position earned after a long time and most of us don't want it. There are lots of former admin's who haven't been around in years, so everytime you make the site better you are doing better than they've done in months or years. So please be content with that knowledge, and don't try so hard for a position or title. This site is a playground for writers of all ages, and that is the joy here. You did very well, and have earned a stripe or two, and we all love you for it. Thanks again. Aleister 1:54 13 10
"...an admin is a position earned after a long time..."? "Earned"?! Are you high? On The Drugs? Uncyclopedians fall upward. UnCompetence is Uncylopedia's helium. You're right about the "not wanting it" bit, though. It doesn't even get you a good parking spot. In fact, it gets you a worse one. Out in Lot X. By the airport. And not the side with the seedy peelers bar, either. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 04:26, October 13, 2010 (UTC)
Aww, poor dear. You have my sympathies. *hugs Modusoperandi* ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101013 - 04:34 (UTC)
Most often, if someone actively asks for any extra perks or powers, they, by default, won't get them. Except if they fuck their boss, at which they get promoted past veterans... but that works better IRL, and not so well online. (It was even worse hearing that the guys doing that were bisexual CEO and some guy who wanted to get his own high profile unit to lead. He screwed it up and was fired last night! XD )
I've been on-and off from here for almost three years, and would probably run away screaming and with a lot of drama (again), were I to wake up one morning with an admin badge on my proverbial pillow. It's like doing what you normally do, but with a big red target of "VANDALISE ME/HATE ME AND CHASE ME WITH PITCHFORKS/DISRESPECT MA AUTHORITAH!" on your forehead. No thanks. -- DameViktoria Heart_anim.gif Icons-flag-gb - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 05:06, 13 Oct
People are just fun like that, aren't they? The ones that overtly want things are usually the last ones that should get them, the folks who keep order are generally the most hated, and the rest of folks are left to just look on and go, ugh, not again at each new repetition of the same pattern... such fun. Of course, it's still entertainment. The overt ugh is just cover for the fact that many actually like the break in pattern. Like to see folks be arses and be crushed, perhaps even secretly root for the maintainer to fail sometimes... ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101013 - 05:22 (UTC)
Hey everyone, When I first asked to be a poopsmith ya I kinda wanted to be a poopsmith. But I knew they would say no. But that last post was with Aleisters quotes was just to see if I could really piss anyone off. I didn't mean any thing I said. So Aleister, I hope I didn't make you angry when I used your quotes. I didn't mean it. --Tophat headless 16:26, October 13, 2010 (UTC)

I sure hope he checks this board soon. I just saw him running out of the house with a rope, chainsaw, and what may or may not have been a wild ferret. He kept mumbling something about Mapquesting directions to your house. I'm sure you'll be fine though. --John Lydon 16:34, October 13, 2010 (UTC)

Ferret... what... ohmigod, my ferret! HE STOLE MY FERRET! ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101013 - 16:48 (UTC)

Why don't you...

...invent your own title, like, uh, something like "Boobsmith". Then you can go boobsmithing all over the place and everyone is in awe. Good idea, right? -- Style Oranssiviiva Guide 15:58, October 15, 2010 (UTC)

OMG! You're right! Now I just need to think of a title...--Tophat headless 02:53, October 16, 2010 (UTC)

Try "Boobsmith". -- Style Oranssiviiva Guide 18:07, October 18, 2010 (UTC)
Ok, I'm a "Boobsmith". Thank you --Tophat headless 21:22, October 18, 2010 (UTC)
In that case, I'm gonna start telling the noobs that I'm an admim here on the site. Tinymasaru.gifpillow talk 22:18, October 18, 2010 (UTC)
Is that any relation to a mimsey? ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101018 - 23:36 (UTC)
No, an "admim" is short for "admime" - although the abbreviation is against the general rule. Anyway, he or she mimicks administratory staff, going through the motions but never getting any work done. It's a great post if you want to go into politics later on. -- Style Oranssiviiva Guide 19:13, October 19, 2010 (UTC)
What do you mean, going through the motions but never getting any work done? That's exactly what a good admin does, innit? ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101019 - 19:41 (UTC)
It's what I do. Wait! Did you just call me and admin??? Up yours then.  Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~ Xkey280 ~  20 Oct 2010 ~ 01:06 (UTC)
No, but you'd probably make a good one. ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101020 - 01:19 (UTC)
This.  Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~ Xkey280 ~  20 Oct 2010 ~ 01:40 (UTC)
Excuse my incredible denseness, but what do you mean? ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101020 - 01:49 (UTC)
Density. -- Style Oranssiviiva Guide 19:07, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
No. Denseness. Muffin over vorpal. ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101020 - 19:13 (UTC)
Dentistry. -- Style Oranssiviiva Guide 19:14, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
Detox? ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101020 - 19:33 (UTC)

What's

What's a poopsmith? --Mimo 19:16, October 20, 2010 (UTC)

They're non-admins who are approved to help archive resolved VFD, QVFD, BP and whatnot stuff... nothing overly special, really. Just maintenance. ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101020 - 19:33 (UTC)
...while the post of a Boobsmith is a glorious one! It comes with opportunities of adventure, dates with hot chicks, and a chance to do maintenance! -- Style Oranssiviiva Guide 18:19, October 23, 2010 (UTC)
What would a boobsmith maintain, though? Category:Boobage? ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101023 - 19:50 (UTC)
Soft hands? --LaurelsRomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 19:58, October 23, 2010 (UTC)
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