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Forums: Index > Village Dump > BURN IT ALL!
Note: This topic has been unedited for 3688 days. It is considered archived - the discussion is over. Do not add to unless it really needs a response.

Fellow Uncyclopedians, the time is nigh! The assaults of the EDers and IPs and other random n00blets have proven too effective for our paltry deletion system. No longer can we observe the formalities of war, not when the situation is as desperate as this.

To HELL with the Geneva Convention! BURN IT ALL!

Draw out your torches, pitchforks, and other weapons of mass destruction! Let us purge our sacred halls of the vermin and cruft we attract so easily! Let the holy potato shine with honor and redeeming value once more!

Let us send a message to those n00bs who dare defile us...

We will NEVER surrender!

Forest Fire Week must come!

Who's with me?! --Andorin Kato 21:29, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

BURN IN HELL FOR YOUR SINS!!! Just not my paltry artimacles. It's Mrthejazz... a case not yet solved. 21:31, 8 July 2007 (UTC)
Well, i can't argue that playing with fire does sound pretty fun.... Yay FFW! P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 21:32, 8 July 2007 (UTC)
Sounds scary to me. But I'll bite.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 21:33, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

Nah. Spang talk 09:36, 08 Jul 2007

  • Alright, so maybe I brought this on, but let me set some stuff straight. The argument at the top of this page isn't true. We have QVFD, VFD, and Admins That Don't Care deleting stuff just fine as it is. We have ICU. We have WIP. We are doing just fine. Mentioning "ED", "IPs", and "n00blets" undermines your whole argument, as it makes it look like you are pointing at a small group of users and saying "Hey, its all your fault". We don't really need to huff that many pages at the moment. Please try again later. -- Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 21:45, 8 July 2007 (UTC)
Think so? Let me try something...
Random Pages hit 10 times yields:
Look through those and tell me how many need revamping/deleting. --Andorin Kato 21:50, 8 July 2007 (UTC)
Use VFD. They'll be gone in less then 3 days, I promise. -- Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 21:54, 8 July 2007 (UTC)
The problem with VFD is that it's too slow. You can only have 15 articles at once, more than often it's full, and even if it isn't, if there's only 14 or 13, adding one or two articles per day isn't going to make a huge difference. You can always add more, of course, but that gets you banned for a day. --Andorin Kato 21:56, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

Here's my point about the ten articles

While I wouldn't go so far as to say that six out of every ten articles on Uncyclopedia need to be deleted- that's an outrageous percentile- I'd bet that similar Random Page scrolling would bring up similar statistics. Fact is, while a bunch of users (such as myself) watch New Pages and Recent Changes for stuff to list on QVFD- which I personally think is our most effective deletion tool- it only catches the things that are coming in, not the things that are already there. --Andorin Kato 22:03, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

The three articles on that list that really need to be deleted have been added to VFD. -- Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 00:50, 9 July 2007 (UTC)
Aargh - edit conflicts! --Strange (but) Untrue  Whhhy?Whut?How? *Back from the dead* 01:05, 9 July 2007 (UTC)
With respect, I think you're setting the quality bar quite high there - some of those ones you've said are blatant deletion material I think are just not to your taste, or at least they have good parts and deserve a rewrite tag of some form rather than unceremonious deletion. I admit I'm not keen on the FFW ethos, for just this reason - it's a good way to weed out things that are not to everybody's tastes, but which will be very much liked by others. Like a certain oft' flamewarred page.
I admit we are going through a quiet patch on VFD at the moment, and things aren't getting deleted within the day right now (/me breathes temporary sigh of relief) but it comes and goes. I think most of us VFD-regulars are getting through our lists for deletion reasonably well (correct me if I'm wrong guys?), and I could be wrong, but I think the standard of articles that are ending up there is getting ever so slightly higher (though still of course mostly crap), indicating that we've made a significant improvement. Anyway, that's enough of ramblings of a poopsmith for one day.
If any admin is looking for things to set fire to, by the way, the WIP category has some stuff in that's over a month old. --Strange (but) Untrue  Whhhy?Whut?How? *Back from the dead* 01:05, 9 July 2007 (UTC)

Random Article Clean Up Service

I suggest a random article clean up service, where we pick one random article out of ten out of then clean up. We vote on the random articles and the one that wins gets our dedication and we try to pick it up to featured status, I realize this is just like Wikipedia:Collaborations (and more specifically article collaboration and improvement drive) the but who cares, we already ripped them off before. TRAINTRACKERGrue_Jammy.gif30px-Sucrose_b.gif

We used to have something called "Colonization". It died due to lack of intrest. -- Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 02:08, 9 July 2007 (UTC)
Even though you have a good idea, I doubt it will ever work. I know that I'm way too lazy to finish my own articles, let alone someone else's abandoned article. Even though there are people that are less lazy than me and would rewrite an abandoned article, most people, including me, would rather have the article burned to the ground and start from scratch. --General And Min. THEDUDEMAN30px-Sucrose_b.gif 02:57, 9 July 2007 (UTC)
I thought you were the same person for a moment there. I was all like "Why is the blue and orange person replying to himself?" But anyway, it's an idea that comes up from time to time - it's not bad, but we kind of lack the willing manpower to do it. Maybe when our order for an infinite number of monkeys with typewriters comes through we'll put it into practice. --Strange (but) Untrue  Whhhy?Whut?How? *Back from the dead* 10:29, 9 July 2007 (UTC)
I know, right? That was weird...Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 14:05, 9 July 2007 (UTC)
That got stopped at the border. It's illegal to import an infinite number of monkeys, apparently. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 14:01, 9 July 2007 (UTC)
And also to tape pickles to your grandmother[1]. Those crazy lawmakers. --Strange (but) Untrue  Whhhy?Whut?How? *Back from the dead* 16:13, 9 July 2007 (UTC)
They're different from us, which means they can't be trusted! --Lt. High Gen. Grue The Few The Proud, The Marines 15:46, 10 July 2007 (UTC)
Apparantly Braydie not only controls the spice, but he also controls the infinite monkey supply. I blame Braydie. -- Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 19:58, 10 July 2007 (UTC)
Ah, Monkey Spice. Too bad she got kicked out of the Spice Girls for throwing poo when she got angry or scared. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 20:05, 10 July 2007 (UTC)
Braydie controls the Spice, but I controls the SANDWORMS! --Lt. High Gen. Grue The Few The Proud, The Marines 20:19, 10 July 2007 (UTC)
I control the water pressure in your home. This is because I live in your plumbing, so I can sneak out at night and use your computer. All my contributions to Uncyclopedia are made this way. --The Acceptable Thinking cap small Cainad Sacred Chao (Fnord) 00:06, 11 July 2007 (UTC)
You're the reason why my toilet flushes with a lethargic sigh! I thought it was because I poop too much. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 00:22, 11 July 2007 (UTC)
I like to pretend to participate in conversations occasionally. Also, I'm hungry, insomniac, and otherwise incapacitated. So there.....what?-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 02:58, 11 July 2007 (UTC)


I concur! Let's burn everything, along with the witches! Burninate them all (except the kittens, who, of course, will be huffed&ndasf;not burned)! Especially burn the witches who weigh the same as ducks!! Burn, burn, BURN!!! -- The fatgoat Talk (to me, obviously) The Crap I've Done 18:31, 11 July 2007 (UTC)

I agree. Theres too much much crap that needs to be destroyed. --General And Min. THEDUDEMAN30px-Sucrose_b.gif 19:57, 11 July 2007 (UTC)
  1. Except in Japan, obviously.

Some statistics

This month the number of new articles per day is rising in 82%. At the same time the number of monthly edits is decreasing in a 76%. More article but less edits? This can only mean we are wittnesing an accumulation of crap never known before.---Asteroid B612B612 (aka Rataube) - Ñ 07:03, 12 July 2007 (UTC)

It only takes one edit to ICU or QVFD. In fact to QVFD it takes 1/Nth of an edit, where N is the huge number of articles you're putting on there at the same time. --Strange (but) Untrue  Whhhy?Whut?How? *Back from the dead* 09:29, 12 July 2007 (UTC)
Sure, as usual. Still, the amount of surviving crap this month is unprecedented.---Asteroid B612B612 (aka Rataube) - Ñ 10:22, 12 July 2007 (UTC)
If you mean QVFD, yes, it's getting a little backed up but they'll get to it eventually. If not, then get VFDing! --Strange (but) Untrue  Whhhy?Whut?How? *Back from the dead* 11:26, 12 July 2007 (UTC)

Hold on a sec!

Robert Kilroy Silk was deletion material? I really do despair at Uncyclopedia sometimes. Stupid deletionism culture. RKS was made a scapegoat!

Mah. -- Hindleyite Converse 12:27, 15 July 2007 (UTC)


Score: +3 deletion hungry people, who could probably better spend their time writing articles
Score: +Nobody who cares
  • YES!! EMPHATIC YES! We've needed a Forest Fire Week for ages now!--Sir Shandon GUN (Talk) (Trophy Room) 16:37, 15 July 2007 (UTC)
  • Agreed theres way too much crap and not enough of it is getting deleted --General And Min. THEDUDEMAN30px-Sucrose_b.gif 00:39, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
  • A-ffirmative Let the burnination commence --Nytrospawn 02:49, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
  • Burn baby, burn. - I've seen way too much crap after hitting random page. P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 03:08, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
  • LET THE KILLING BEGIN!!! --General Insineratehymn 03:11, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
  • Nooooo. Spang talk 05:29, 18 Jul 2007
  • There's nothing in those articles but crap... beneath their black text is darkness. I WONDER IF THEY EVEN BLEED! THEY'RE IDIOIC... IDIOTIC... barely even Satire! --Lt. High Gen. Grue The Few The Proud, The Marines 05:33, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
  • When in Gotaland, do as the Goths do. Start the fire at the town dump and burn all the shit in the fire. --~ Tophatsig 05:38, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
  • Nah. All we need - how can I put this delicately? - is for more sysops to get off their lazy fat arses and pay attention to the maintenance tasks. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 08:42, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
  • For--Winstanley1 10:24, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
  • Comment I think there needs to be a separate Forum topic for this vote rather than a little section hidden at the bottom of a page most people won't be bothered to read the whole way through. —rc (t) 16:11, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
  • Agreed with Rcmurphy. Also, against. I would like to see another FFW sometime around the anniversary of last years FFW though. It's not too far away. Icons-flag-au Sir Cs1987 UOTM. t. c 16:15, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
  • Comment but that ruins the spontaneity of the angry mob. P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 20:56, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
    A nerd mob? Oooo, scary. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 21:18, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
    You're right, I'm a nerd. my favorite sport is math. Also, Latin. Please insult me again, as I enjoy such things. P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 22:00, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
    I too am a nerd. I didn't know that we formed mobs, what with the asthma, nosebleeds, fallen arches and all. I really must start going to the meetings more often. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 22:29, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
    Don't forget the Dungeons and Dragons clan. If I play less than 4 hours again today, they might not take me seriously! P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 22:35, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
    Hopefully you make your saving throw. You do have a bonus vs nerd, don't you? Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 22:56, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
    No, I traded it for +30 Wedgie resistance. P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 23:14, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
    Good choice. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 23:21, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
  • Why vote? LET'S DO!!! - The fatgoat Talk (to me, obviously) The Crap I've Done 21:21, 18 July 2007 (UTC)
  • Against, and whats that smell? -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me)
  • Comment. Given that only one of the admins who has voted thinks there should be one, I think this vote is moot, despite the score at the top. How can you have a forest fire week, if the only ones who can delete stuff don't want to? Spang talk 10:54, 18 Jul 2007
  • Comment - Also, remember the fact that the admin who voted for hasn't been a regular contributor for over a year. No offense Nytrospawn, know...stuff. :) Icons-flag-au Sir Cs1987 UOTM. t. c 03:28, 19 July 2007 (UTC)
  • Fuck That Shit™, and incidentally, can I ban Andorin for a week? —Hinoa talk.kun 00:00, 19 July 2007 (UTC)
  • Whoop dat trick This is a joke vote for a joke topic. —Braydie 10:50, 19 July 2007 (UTC)
  • Against And I don't generally encourage this kind of thing, but can someone lock this topic soon so it doesn't get bumped again for the millionth time by more unregular members hungry for blood? --Strange (but) Untrue  Whhhy?Whut?How? *Back from the dead* 17:31, 19 July 2007 (UTC)
Done. Topic's closed, has AIDS due to a lack of any admin interest. —Hinoa talk.kun 18:38, 19 July 2007 (UTC)
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