Forum:BENSON NEEDS SUPPORT TO BE N00B OF THE MONTH

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BENSON HAS LAYENED OFF THE ALL-CAPS!

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SOMEBODY NOMINATE BENSON. BENSON HAS MADE 2 ARTICLES AND COUNTLESS EDITS IN MERELY 2 DAYS. NOMINATE AND VOTE FOR BENSON, AND BASK IN HIS GLORY. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO. ARTICLE 1 ARTICLE 2. BENSON IS FUNNY AND BETTER THAN YOU, AND YOU KNOW IT. Benson 22:20, 6 June 2006 (UTC)

Right. It takes a bit more than that to get noticed, i've done 8 articles or so and I haven't...really...Demonbob 22:28, 6 June 2006 (UTC)

YES, BUT YOU AREN'T FUNNY. Benson 22:55, 6 June 2006 (UTC)

I don't really think we have an award that really matches you, honestly . . . maybe we could start an "entertaining but perhaps somewhat confused" noob of the month or something . . . . just thinking out loud. And I'm tolerant of the all caps thing, but sadly, lots of people here, for better or for worse, won't be.--Hrodulf 22:31, 6 June 2006 (UTC)

Re:http://uncyclopedia.org/index.php?title=Forum:BENSON_NEEDS_SUPPORT_TO_BE_N00B_OF_THE_MONTH&oldid=828267: see what I mean about the tolerance thing? ? ?

Normally I despise caps, but BENSON is awesome enough to get away with it. --User:Nintendorulez 22:03, 7 June 2006 (UTC)

BENSON is the best--JAL 200 17:08, 25 September 2006 (UTC)

HAS BENSON WON THIS YET? Benson 19:49, 12 October 2006 (UTC)

I'm sorrey, BENSON, but the race is terribly close.--The One and Only Czar Yah 19:51, 12 October 2006 (UTC)

Too late to be King of the n00bs, but there's always Useless Gobshite of the Month if someone nominates you. You're guaranteed my vote.  :) ~ T. (talk) 20:00, 12 October 2006 (UTC)

FOOL! BENSON IS NOT USELESS! Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 21:10, 12 October 2006 (UTC)

Benson of the Month

ALTHOUGH BENSON ISN'T BLACK, HE ENJOYS THE AWARD WITH HIS NAME ON IT.

Uncyclopedia:Benson of the Month

Eligibility Requirements

To be nominated, you must:

• BE BENSON
• HAVE AN EXTREME HATRED FOR THOSE BENEATH YOU, SIMILAR BUT NEVER AS STRONG AS BENSON'S HATRED FOR THEM

Benson (Talk • Contribs (del) • Editcount • Block (rem-lst-all) • Logs • Groups • Checkuser)

Score: +14 1/7 Glorious BENSON Dollars

Got it. Okay, I nominate BENSON for BENSON of the month. Nom and For --Hrodulf 22:35, 6 June 2006 (UTC)

THAT'S ALL THAT BENSON WAS ASKING FOR. FOR FOR BENSON FOR BENSON OF THE MONTH. Benson 22:49, 6 June 2006 (UTC)

For. Now go away or I shall call you a nincompoop.--Witt E, 02:03, 7 June 2006 (UTC)

Let's see, uhh... For. He IS the prototypical n00b, isn't he? --Insineratehymn 05:42, 7 June 2006 (UTC)

FOR --User:Nintendorulez 22:11, 7 June 2006 (UTC)

For What can I say? Benson is God. --ENeGMA 22:23, 7 June 2006 (UTC)

For - - Sir Real Hamster {talk} {contribs} 01:00, 8 June 2006 (UTC)

FOR BENSON. --OsirisX 07:38, 8 June 2006 (UTC)

• For Benson is hilarious lol Jaybenad 20:11, 11 June 2006 (UTC)

• For Vote Benson for Benson!--ThatGuy 21:18, 11 June 2006 (UTC)

• FOR the one true Benson. Not these other fake Bensons. --Immy 00:45, 12 June 2006 (UTC)

• Against. A little too much Benson, if you ask me. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 10:09, 12 June 2006 (UTC)
  • Comment Against Codeine's Against, no such thing as too much Benson. - Sir Real Hamster {talk} {contribs} 18:47, 13 June 2006 (UTC)
    • Comment For Surreal Hamster's Against Benson 21:07, 13 June 2006 (UTC)
      • Comment For Benson's For for Surreal Hamster's Against --User:Nintendorulez 23:54, 13 June 2006 (UTC)

• 1/7th of a vote. What the heck --Clorox MUN ONS (diskussion) ☃ 01:56, 18 June 2006 (UTC)
• BENSON IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL!
• For the love of BENSON shines like a shiny thing Oddbod 12:01, 20 June 2006 (UTC)
• FOR -- Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 01:11, 13 October 2006 (UTC)
• THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE true Benson. --Anyone 16:27, 18 October 2006 (UTC)
• Goose egg - This Benson madness is driving me nuts. --AAA! (AAAA) 06:33, 2 December 2006 (UTC)
  • Comment THEN THAT MEANS YOU ARE INFERIOR TO BENSON! --General Insineratehymn 07:12, 2 December 2006 (UTC)
    • I sure am; but nobody cares. And what's the point of all this? We all know who's going to win... --AAA! (AAAA) 11:22, 2 December 2006 (UTC)
      • THE POINT IS THAT YOU DO NOT COMPREHEND THE FACT THAT BENSON IS BETTER THAN YOU! --General Insineratehymn 16:44, 2 December 2006 (UTC)
        • I beg to differ... --AAA! (AAAA) 00:01, 3 December 2006 (UTC)
          • OH, SO YOU DO COMPREHEND THE FACT THAT BENSON IS BETTER THAN YOU? --General Insineratehymn 00:03, 3 December 2006 (UTC)
            • No, Benson is NOT better than me! --AAA! (AAAA) 00:07, 3 December 2006 (UTC)
              • YES HE IS. BENSON IS BETTER THAN EVERYONE, INCLUDING YOU. --General Insineratehymn 00:08, 3 December 2006 (UTC)
• FOR - I'VE CHANGED MY WAYS. --AAA! (AAAA) 09:36, 4 March 2007 (UTC)
• Weak Against Benson's glitzy tabloid sockpuppet voting sex scandal has changed my once neutral opinion of him. Alas. That, and his profuse and gaping Bensonry. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 06:59, 13 December 2006 (UTC)
• I DISApprove This Message, 22:42, 7 January 2007 (UTC)
• ForForFor Must I say anything? High^General _Grue
• FOR he's a jolly-good BENSON, whom nobody can deny! --Redmond 16:30, 1 April 2007 (UTC)

• never I hate Benson! --Trar (talk|contribs|grueslayer) 21:03, 6 May 2007 (UTC)

No Orleans San Antonio Saints owner Tom Benson

Do you want this man to be your Benson of the Month?

Score: -9

• Nom and Against Kind of a jerk, really. —rc (t) 23:33, 6 June 2006 (UTC)

• Against. This Benson is not worthy of our adoration.--<<>> 01:05, 7 June 2006 (UTC)

• Against. Let's see how low this guy's score can be. - - Sir Real Hamster {talk} {contribs} 18:06, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• Against. I've heard he's an asshole. 'Nuff said. • Spang • ☃ • talk • 22:12, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• Comment. There is no need for a comment since nobody likes him but...he is a pedofile and hates jews! BENSON DISAPROVES OF THIS! Benson 17:00, 8 June 2006 (UTC)
• Against fake Bensons who wear suspenders and do the Nixon. --Immy 00:56, 12 June 2006 (UTC)
• Against I know I already voted against this guy, but I think we all agree that this guy sucks so much he deserves extra against votes. - Sir Real Hamster {talk} {contribs} 14:42, 27 June 2006 (UTC)
• Against --User:Nintendorulez 16:17, 9 July 2006 (UTC)
• Against Fake Bensons. Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 01:12, 13 October 2006 (UTC)
• Against - just to see how negative this guy's score can get. -- Sir Cs1987 UOTM. t. c 07:00, 20 October 2006 (UTC)
• Against. Sure, I already voted against this guy once, but fuck him anyway. --User:Nintendorulez 15:27, 23 December 2006 (UTC)

Legendary jazz guitarist George Benson

The smoothest Benson by far... but does he have the most sheer strength and ruthlessness?

Score: +6

• Nom and For. Right on, baby. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 23:38, 6 June 2006 (UTC)
• For. Aw, yeah. --Algorithm 23:48, 6 June 2006 (UTC)
• For I'm sure he doesn't speak in all caps. --Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 23:56, 6 June 2006 (UTC)
• For Everybody loves the jazz! Except for those goths. Useless. Demonbob 00:32, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• For. Smoooooooooooooooth. ~ T. (talk) 02:24, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• For. Cooool. • Spang • ☃ • talk • 12:24, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• For He's got chops. Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) 14:36, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• For Superior Bensonitude. -- » Sir Savethemooses Grand Commanding Officer ... holla atcha boy» 18:13, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• For The ultimate Benson. --Moogle.EXE 20:53, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• Against Nothing personal, but when I created this award, I intended the criteria to stipulate that you had to be our Benson. I never intended for other Bensons to be involved. --Hrodulf 21:01, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• AGAINST Benson hates other Bensons! Benson 21:41, 7 June 2006 (UTC)

• Comment Benson has something to say. Vote for Benson! Who is stronger, Benson or George Benson? Also, who is better at jazz guitar? Yeah, but who cares about that? Plus, Benson cares less about others feelings. Isn't that what being Benson-like is all about? Benson 22:02, 7 June 2006 (UTC)

• For. That is what the jazz is all about! No, actually, it's more like Kodak Film. No, jazz is like the New Coke. It'll be around forever. Heh heh huh. --User:Nintendorulez 22:05, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• Against Gotta love the original Benson Jaybenad 20:11, 11 June 2006 (UTC)
• Against fake Bensons. This Benson doesn't even play guitar - he's faking it. That's just a guitar-shaped radio that plays the music of Lonnie Johnson. Fake. --Immy 00:53, 12 June 2006 (UTC)
• Against fake Bensons deserve no awards. - Sir Real Hamster {talk} {contribs} 18:49, 13 June 2006 (UTC)
• For suductive sounds Oddbod 12:04, 20 June 2006 (UTC)
• For. Because he looks like a straight Wayne Brady. --ANIDN MENOSCWICZ 02:15, 19 July 2006 (UTC)
• Against fake Bensons. Our BENSON can play guitar better than Jimi Hendrix, BB King, Carlos Santana, and Eric Clapton combined. Crazyswordsman the Mediocre - (bite me/I'm not that bad) Click here for hot pr0n! BENSON IS BETTER THAN YOU!! 01:12, 17 October 2006 (UTC)

Benson, Illinois, pop. 408

A slightly biased US map drawn by a democrat.

Score: +1

• Nom and For. With a median household income of 40,500 and a population density of 926.6 per square kilometer, this Benson is way cooler than that fucking Benson in Oxfordshire, England. But does it have what it takes to be Benson of the Month? InfiniteMonkey 03:30, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• Comment. Yes but it's in America.... Benson 17:01, 8 June 2006 (UTC)

Benson-Class Destroyer DD-421, USS Benson

The hate boat.

Score: +1

• Nom and For. Displacing a whopping 1620 tons (2200 when fully loaded), 348 feet long, powered by two turbines with twin screws allowing it to do 37 knots, and armed with four five-inch guns and torpedo tubes, this Benson spoke in ALL CAPS to enemy ships and submarines! During World War II, the USS Benson valiantly provided covering fire against Japanese aircraft in the Battle of Wake Island and took part in the Allied invasion of Sicily. Truly, the Benson of this or any other month. InfiniteMonkey 03:30, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
  • WICKED! I'M ALL FOR THIS ONE!!! -- Colonel Swordman 03:59, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• For. I have to go with this Benson in a firefight.--<<>> 13:17, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• Comment Just to clear up some misconceptions, Benson is also 348 feet long (if you know what Benson means), Benson was too busy tracking down Hitler during WWII to be in a firefight, and Benson can launch a torpedo out of his eye. VOTE FOR BENSON! Benson 22:04, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• Against fake Bensons. Our Benson would tear this puny ship to shreds using nothing but CAPS. BENSON SANK YOUR BATTLESHIP!!! --Immy I will never wash my talk page again 16:16, 12 June 2006 (UTC)
• Against fake Bensons. --User:Nintendorulez 21:29, 17 October 2006 (UTC)

Dave Benson Phillips, legendary kids show host

Your granny's favourite.

Score: +6

• For DaBlade (Click here to bitch. :)) 20:01, 16 June 2006 (UTC)
• Nomination and For. Get Your Own Back on BENSON. Playdays = Endless juvenile fun. -- Boothman 13:33, 7 June 2006 (UTC).
• For DBP! --Hindleyite | PL | GUN | WOTM | Converse 15:01, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• For The first thing I agree with Boothman on. --Kalir, Wandering Hippie Salesman 21:37, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• Who can forget Children's BBC program with DBP with ragdoll Peggy Pissflaps on his hand.....British Childrens Programming at its best. 'ELLO!!!!! -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me) 22:48, 7 June 2006 (UTC)

Comment does that count as a vote? it doesn't say '''for''' (this was neither a vote, nor a pipe). --Hrodulf 14:43, 8 June 2006 (UTC)

If has to be For.... -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me) 16:39, 8 June 2006 (UTC)

• I have no clue what show he hosts, but just looking at that face makes me say FOR. --User:Nintendorulez 22:03, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• For (as long as I can vote more then once, the Jazz guy was first by the way) HIS FACE! --Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 22:08, 7 June 2006 (UTC)
• For. I remember this programme from sooo long ago. Good times... For. • Spang • ☃ • talk • 22:09, 7 June 2006 (UTC)

• Comment Benson had his own kids show too...but everyone died on it. On the plus side kids learnt the letter J and the Number 666! Also Benson learned the meaning of friendship.Benson

• For. Powerful reminescences coming back... must use incredible Benson powers... no, that failed too.... ugh. --The Rt. Hon. BarryC MUN (Symposium!) Sigh. Double Sigh. 15:34, 8 June 2006 (UTC)
• For - YES!!!! - LordHilly 19:48, 8 June 2006 (UTC)
• Against Benson dislikes his large teeth. Benson 12:16, 9 June 2006 (UTC)
• Against! This Benson is a fake! Jaybenad 20:11, 11 June 2006 (UTC)
• Against fake Bensons. While this particular fake Benson is the closest to the glory that is the real Benson, he still pales in comparison. --Immy 01:02, 12 June 2006 (UTC)

• Comment - Is this the first time this Benson has been called pale? I think so. --Immy I will never wash my talk page again 16:10, 12 June 2006 (UTC)

• Against fake Bensons deserve no awards. - Sir Real Hamster {talk} {contribs} 18:50, 13 June 2006 (UTC)

Anna Benson

Score: 2 pairs of double-D's

Female Benson? What twisted puke of nature is this?

• Nom and For Mostly because we need at least one chick to be nommed, and her husband Kris Benson wasn't a chick. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 05:06, 17 October 2006 (UTC)
• Against. Nonetheless, I don't want any fake Bensons. Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 05:42, 17 October 2006 (UTC)
• Weak for. Yes, she is a fake Benson, but she's pretty hot... --User:Nintendorulez 20:40, 21 October 2006 (UTC)
• For Sexy --GAMESPOT=666 04:11, 22 January 2007 (UTC)
• For --Redmond 16:30, 1 April 2007 (UTC)

Detective Olivia Benson

Score: -1

The most badass female Benson is the fakest Benson

• Nom and against. As badass as Detective Benson is, and as hot as Mariska is, she's still a fake Benson. Possibly the fakest Benson. Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 05:49, 17 October 2006 (UTC)

Chicago Bears running back Cedric Benson

Score: -1

Our Benson would score a touchdown every time he touched the ball

• Nom and against. Probably the strongest fake Benson. Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 05:55, 17 October 2006 (UTC)
• STRONG FOR SUPER BOWL HERE WE COME! --GAMESPOT=666 04:09, 22 January 2007 (UTC)
• Comment If there is one Benson who could rival THE Benson, it's this Benson. -- » Sir Savethemooses Grand Commanding Officer ... holla atcha boy» 04:55, 22 January 2007 (UTC)
• Against Jerk. —rc (t) 05:02, 22 January 2007 (UTC)
• Comment. Maybe that IS our BENSON. He's black, after all, just like our BENSON in his material form. The Bears are in the Super Bowl for a reason. --Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 05:12, 22 January 2007 (UTC)

The Benson Hotel

Score: -1

Most luxorious fake-Benson? Maybe.

• Nom and against. Probably the most luxorious fake Benson. --Anyone 16:27, 18 October 2006 (UTC)

Former Cricketer and Umpire Mark Benson

Score: +0... Perhaps

• Nom and Strong Against. Why the hell did I nominate him anyway? -- Sir Cs1987 UOTM. t. c 01:24, 19 October 2006 (UTC)
• I dunno. Archiving purposes? Nevertheless, 3/8 of a mildly salsa-tinged Abstain-ish Weak For - Maybe -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 06:56, 13 December 2006 (UTC)

Benson television series and the entire cast

Score: 0

Despite being mildly entertaining, is this program good for anything else?

• CommentAlthough he is black and possesses the name BENSON and is also on the BotM award and had his own TV show... BENSON forgets where he is going with this. DO NOT GIVE THIS BENSON YOUR VOTES! Benson 20:09, 4 November 2006 (UTC)
• Strong Against. BENSON HAS ORDERED SUCH. Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 01:40, 5 November 2006 (UTC)
• Against What a rip-off! That's just our Benson on the left there! -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 06:52, 23 December 2006 (UTC)

BENSON (Talk • Contribs (del) • Editcount • Block (rem-lst-all) • Logs • Groups • Checkuser)

Score: $-\infty$

• Nom and really really really strong against. Probably the most notorious fake Benson. --User:Nintendorulez 21:31, 31 December 2006 (UTC)
• STRONGEST AGAINST. A fake Benson that actually managed to find his way here. --Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 21:41, 31 December 2006 (UTC)
• Comment Wasn't he really PantsMacKenzie? --AAA! (AAAA) 01:21, 10 January 2007 (UTC)