It is my pleasure to announce the second writing competition of 2016. No, I don't mean that, it is a duty based on the fact that a writing competition is about the only way to call budding Uncyclopedians back and convince them that someone might actually read their creations. The only pleasure is the pleasure of simplicity, as the rules for this game are almost exactly the rules for the last one.
In the past, winning such a competition has been the fast-track for featuring on the website main page, and even just showing up has put editors on the slow-track (that is, nominated on VFH but not necessarily getting anyone to vote for it). And as always, your user talk page will probably get a photograph of an attractive medal.
I have a list of gaping holes in the main encyclopedia. Anyone signing up (below) will certify (by un-greying) either one or two categories in which he would like me to assign them a page name lacking only the page. Assignments will be made some time on April Fool's Day. Late entrants (adding their name to the table after I have started making assignments) are welcome but have less time to write. This means you need to be an Uncyclopedian with a user name, which you would have to be anyway to contribute illustrations, and good luck winning submitting an article without photos. Anyone can propose additional pages to be written, but no one will be so lucky as to get the one he proposed. I will assign the pages at random, except that I may re-assign unaccepted pages from our previous competition if I run out; also, I might assign a page to an editor that seems especially likely to write a good one in view of his individual talents [sic], and I might give Featured Authors, and especially authors in the Hall of Shame especially challenging assignments, though still a basic page the encyclopedia ought to have rather than a county commissioner from Utah.
- Fulfillment and deadline
The contest will be judged by Admins, fallen-away Admins, and Admins who are in the process of trying to fall away. Romartus and ChiefjusticeDS have already stepped up to take the attendant abuse and accusations of favoritism. Simsie has also expressed willingness but is stuck in the Dreaded Real World until the end of the U.S. income-tax filing season. Setting the writing deadline to the exact deadline for filing U.S. income tax returns may let her be the third judge, depending on how many stragglers come to her for help (in filing taxes, not writing Uncyclopedia articles). Judging typically takes 3-7 days after the deadline. Articles will be judged by our usual Pee Review criteria. Judges can do one of two things:
- Do a regular, long-form Pee Review for a point score out of 50 points
- Rate the articles 1, 2, 3, up to the number submitted, which I will transform arithmetically to 50,44,38,... or something, so their favorite gets 50 points, no one gets a mortifying zero, and the judges' scores can be combined by addition.
Who's in?02:01 28-Mar-16
Sounds fun! May I enter? 20:41, March 28, 2016 (UTC)
- I'm in. I messed up the formatting due to being a Noob. Format it properly because I fucked up. I'll do the memes category. Did somebody say Pingas? --CrappyUncyclopedian1111 (talk) 18:40, March 29, 2016 (UTC)
- No, you fucked up because "duplicate the last line" doesn't mean "fill your personal details into the last line." Fixed now. 02:07 30-Mar-16
I'm in, I just signed up for an account after years of giggling like an idiot at UC pages. BONUS CRED SIGHTED, TOP LEL CONFIRMED. Un-dwfuji (talk) 13:42, April 8, 2016 (UTC)
Official entry form
To enter the contest, duplicate the last line of the Wikitable. In your copy, change "Your name here" to your name or signature, and remove
STYLE="background-color: gray" from one or two of the boxes to indicate the categories on which you would like to write a page.
|User name||Assigned articles||Comments||Scores||Result|
|21:37, March 28, 2016 (UTC)||Lemonade||Another great article on food?||0||0||0|
|Tay||Microsoft tweet-bot that seems to hate Negroes||0||0||0|
|EStop||Roof||Boaty McBoatface||Winner of the name-that-research-vessel contest||0||0||0|
|Mousebelt||Brexit||Corey Lewandowski||Shove-happy Trump manager||0||0||0|
|Your name here||For office use only||0||0||0|