From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Fluffiness is one of the three universal elements, (Fluffiness, Evilness and Holiness) and a universal attribute that can be applied to anything. Generally, when something possess Fluffiness it is a good thing; however, due to the unfluffy nature of humanity, people who attain too much fluffiness can become fluffalized to oblivion, and experience a most gruesome (not to mention fluffy) death, as the sheer fluffiness runs rampant in a most fluffalicious manner, greatly disturbing the delicate balance of fluffiness and unfluffiness in the immediate surroundings.
edit The Nature of Fluffiness
Fluffiness manifests itself in multiple ways. The overall most significant of those have to do with energy; (that is, fluffy new age energy) as it gets "lighter", ie. it becomes less compact, it could be said that it becomes more fluffy. Everything that exists is fluffy in this sense to some degree, as matter is energy. This also ultimately means that getting too fluffy is quite a disturbing thing to happen; particularly if you get fluffalized all the way to oblivion. Fluffiness, in another sense, is also a measure of greatness, from a divine point of view.
edit The Different Uses
The two distinct meanings of fluffiness are often mistakenly equated. Fluffology expert John "Don't quote me on this" Smith clarifies some of the more subtle points and explains some related concepts in the introduction to his seminal work, "The Nature of Things Fluffy":
"Fluffiness in the first sense is referred to specifically as energetical fluffiness, and fluffiness in the second sense as divine fluffiness. Overall fluffiness, referred to simply as fluffiness, and the measure most commonly used, is equal to the average of the energetical and divine fluffiness. Something which is exceptionally fluffy (compared to an average) is often referred to as 'fluffalicious'. As for unfluffiness, the term has two meanings; while it can mean a complete lack of fluffiness, it is mostly used to indicate a lack of fluffiness compared to something else, typically some sort of average."
edit Fluffiness And You
The more divine fluffiness you possess, in addition to how holy you are, the greater you are. The greater you are, the more reason you have to laugh insanely, a most divine and wholesome activity, and one which is known to bring great joy. Also note that if something is more fluffy than you, you should look up to the sheer fluffiness of it, or else you may get in trouble. Fluffalicious trouble, if the fluffier one so wishes. And thus, possessing a high amount of fluffiness is truly of great importance.
edit Things That Are Exceptionally Fluffy
- (warning: while The Holy Broken Chair of Fluffiness is indeed most fluffy, as well as holy, it is also pretty maniacal, and works in mysterious ways; worship and pray to it for guidance at your own risk!)
- The Divine Fluffalizer (the fluffiest person in existence; being a loner of questionable sanity with a rather maniacal state of mind, you'd better stay away, or He might fluffalize you!)
- Usage of and the language Flufese
edit Common Phrases Related To Fluffiness
Here follows a short list of common phrases referring to fluffiness in one way or another. They are by nature fluffy, and thus their usage is simply fluffalicious, and thus the only logical thing to do is to make regular use of them.
- By All That Is Fluffy! -- a phrase used to highlight something
- For Fluff's sake! -- another phrase used to highlight something (alt: For Fluffiness' sake; For the sake of Fluffiness)
- Fluff off, you defluffalized, unfluffy piece of non-fluff! -- an extremely strong insult; indicates that the person referred to severely lacks in fluffiness
- May you live in Fluffiness. -- a well-wishing (alt: May you live a life of Fluffiness)