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- 33 - A important man that pronounced himself the ruler of all that is happening right now is made dead by people who take your money.
- 1337 - Important king man become king today.
- 1500 - Discovoury of primary colououeurs (oh shite sourry)
- 1801 - Funny quote man say, "I decide to make quote that is dumbed down."
- 1939 - Man with mustache want other country. Other country no like it very much.
- 1948 - Nice brown man with glasses killed. Everyone sad because he want peace.
- 1984 - Sesame Street is brought to you by the letter !, and children eveywhere confused.
- 1985 - Mr. Movie Star Man tell bad communist men to be communist no more.
- 1997 - Big Nasty Man make boo-boo with yummy woman. Big Nasty Woman go foo-foo! Yay!
- 2000 - Mr. Smarty Man becomes President and sets example for we like us.
- 2001 - Two building fall down. Everyone sad.
- 2005 - Subway in big city collapse. Everyone still sad.
- 2006 - Very important man shoots other man. Third man sad. We mad. Everyone else glad.
- 2009 - Mr. Black Man go to big white house. Big Nasty Woman follow. We sad. Everyone else glad.
- 2010 - Little man go to space and die. We rejoice! Yay!
- 2015 - Planes crash into every single landmark in the world because it is Friday the 13.