Faroe Islands

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Skjátueyjar (Icelandic)
Føroyar (Faroese)

Føroyar
The little islands between Iceland and Norway who have silly language.
  
(Flag) (Coat of Arms)
Motto: Though Iceland is a little bigger than us it doesn't mean that the Icelandic women are better!
Anthem: Tú Gamla, Tú fría, Tú fjallhøga norð!!
Capital Depil
Largest city Kalbak
Official languages Faroese language, Hieroglyphics an Icelandic-Danish Hybrid with Norwegian Accent
Government Ridiculous(kindergarden)
National Hero(es) Ríkin N. Djurhuus, MacGyver, Kim Jung il,Trølla Pætur
Declaration
of Independence
 1814 from Egypt, but Denmark is still fooling around.
Currency Fish
Religion Over-religious Christians/

What the fuck is the Faroe Islands? And can we declare them war?

~ George WC Bush on some islands somewhere in an ocean

All hail me!

~ Pharao Eshmeil XIV of Pharao Islands on Faroe Islands

HELLO NORWAY!

~ Rock band somewhere on Faroe Islands

The Rebel camp must be destroyed! Owh wait, that is in iceland!

~ Darth Vader lost in the Faroe Islands

They are white, unlike the greenlanders, they must be danes

~ Danish prime minister Anders Fogh Rasmussen on Faroe Islands
The Pharaoh Islands
Battle of Vestmanna, 1854 - The Pharaohs defeating Napoleon's submarine forces

The Pharaohs (also known as "Those Rocks" ) are a country of rocks and mountains north of the tartan clad land known as Scotland, although they are often confused with the Shetland Islands. Faroe islands claims to own denmark.

Being a bizarre, overly religious place, the Faroe Islands are currently ruled under a theocratic dictatorship. Electricity does not exist on the islands, hence the lack of Pharoese internet users. It is believed that the ruler of the islands is Ríkin N. Djurhuus, a gay who has only had two hairstyles in his life, and runs around searching for a higher meaning in life, whilst listening to Britney Spears.


They did this because no-one can spell Pharaoh without the use of an expensive dictionary. When some people attempt to write the word Pharaoh, they normally write Faroe. Besides, who spends money on books containing thousands of pages of words which nobody ever uses. Some historians, on the other hand, think that this lands were actually a protectorat of Egypt.

The Faroese are strong realy strong. It´s a well known fact that a Faroese with a mild headace and a cold can beat up 15 danes and when in a fresh condition he can take twice that amount single handlily. Those norse vikings who inhabited Faroe Islands were not only one of the best navigators for their time but they were also nearly made of steel.

The first Pharaoh of the Pharaohs was Tróndur í Gøtu. His ruling time began in the late 9. century AD. His religion was of Satanism and worship of Evil, and he fought fiercily with a religious rival Sigmundur Brestisson who was a unionist and a newly converted baptist. even thow the Pharoese regard Sigumnd as being the good one then he was the evil one, because he brought the Pharoese under foreign autority.

Tróndur í Gøtu was a grym man, realy grym man, he was big and bulky and had big red hair. His biggest achievement invention of Black Metal, he built monument in the shape of pyramid of splendid appearence. The remains of the Great Pyramid can be seen even today and is known as Slættaratindur.

The Pharaoh Islands are infamous for being the world's biggest nesting and breeding place for Psycho Killer Seagulls(and to a lesser extent Pigeons). No one should ever underestimate the perilous powers of the Killer Seagulls (and Pigeons), for they are an evil species (OMG PWN). They were originally bred by Megatron (OMG), ruler of the Decepticons (PWN), in order to be vessels for his sons arrival on Earth, bringing doom to us all.


Klaaaksvik is the place where the people in Pharaoh Islands go to get water, it is the only place in Pharaohes that you can find rain. There they have huge tanks where they store all the water, and all the Pharaohes people come there once every year to celebrate the rain in klaksvik. They call the celebration Summarfestivalurin, and that is the day where it's raining most trew the year. There is also a village called Gøta, there they are trying to copy this festival, but sources say that they are too lazy to succeed.

The dolphins shall get their revenge.

There are vicious rumours going around that Faroese people are hunting pilot whales to eat them. This is entirely untrue. According to Greenpeace, Faroese people are actually hunting cute, innocent dolphins. As there are very few leisure activities, men and young boys typically pass the long hours hunting dolphins. These dead dolphins are left to rot, and sometimes the wifes of the men will pour gasoline onto the dolphins and set them (the dolphins) on fire to speed up the decomposing process. The fins on the dolphins are cut off before this and sold as luxury toilet-paper, to the skilled dolphin-hunters, who maintain such a lifestyle by signing high-paying endorsement deals with local seagull-breeding networks.

[edit] History

Brandur Enni found the Faroe Islands and the city Torshavn in 2005 with his gay friend Lance Bass. They celebrated this by making a gay porno movie. Two weeks later they decided to call the city Torshavn after a man in Björkland called Thor Shoeson. People in Faroe Islands speak Icelandic but they speak it like they are mentally retarded.

The evil emperor of Iceland, Björk, has often declared a war with Faroe Islands. The Faroese just didn't give a shit. "It's only Iceland" they say, "no threat".

The Pharaoese people in the present

Faroe Islander

In short, the pharaoese people nowadays are a sorry bunch of people who obey to everything the fat bacon eaters of the Danish royal family tells them to do. But what can one do if one is addicted to and dependent on bacon from a faraway land. There are anual contest where everybody compets on how many danish sausages and hotdogs people can eat.

[edit] Culture

Every home of the pharoese has a picture hanging on the wall of Anders fogh (from planets of the apes) and Margrete (the queen of denmark). There is an annual contest in eating sausages. The person who can eat the most sausages during one minute will have the chance to meet the queen of Denmark. There´s an annual event that is called Ovastevna, where everyone comes together in Nølsoy and worship a fish called Ove. The legend has it that the fish called Ove was an Ulka. The legends says that he saved the Pharaoh islands from the evil penguin queen Björk.

[edit] Faroese View on other countries

  • Iceland Our primitive brother in the north west. Where people still believe in trolls. Iceland only has mud roads. But since they are friendly with us then our ship Norønna sails up there now and then, supplying the icelanders with food.
  • Norway Should still belong to us, since we discovered it, the western norwegian are with me on that, since most of them try to imitate our language. They call it Norøysk (nicknamed: Ny norsk).
  • Sweden Sweds, are a cozy tribe of people living in the norwegian peninsuala. 50% of them work by chopping wood in the forrests. They used to make Volvos witch was a clumsy veicle, half submarine and half truck. They called it passenger cars thow.
  • Pharaoh Some lazy bastards in egypt who didn´t lift a finger in his life. They stole the names from Faroe Islands and used faroese slaves to built pyramides for them.
  • England Our feminine "high class" neighbours in the south who drinks tea, chats about the royal family and plays golf.
  • USA Where is that? is it in America or Europe?
  • Greenland We should own that country as well, since we found it, if not then we´ll have to burn it all to the ground.
  • EU why do we need EU when we have MC Hár,IRF, Týr and ALS ?
  • Denmark A flat desert territory between scandinavia and sahara. Danes (people living in Denmark) and Swines generaly live in harmony with each other.
  • Finland Is ruled by the Lordis and the Dudesons .
  • Bjørk An evil emperor of Iceland that soon will be Destroyed by Eivør Pállsdóttir.
  • Whales Fuck the whales and kill those bastards they are eating our fish.
  • Føroya Bjór Europe's best beer in the world.
  • Germany I choose to belive the americans on that one, Everybody is a NAZI in germany, every single person!!
  • CCCP(Russia) Good comrades, they produce vodka!
  • North Corea Kim Your wife is BANGING!!

Poeple in Faroe Islands are very horny and have huge willies

Cold Nordic Countries
Denmark | Faeroe Islands | Finland | Greenland | Iceland | Norway | Sweden | Svalbard |
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