Uncyclopedia:VFH/queue

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Below are the articles which have passed VFH and are currently in the feature queue, awaiting placement on the front page. Articles should change over automatically at 12:00am UTC. You may need to refresh the page if it doesn't seem current.

Current time: 5:07am, 31 August 2014 UTC
Time until switchover: 19 hours (refresh)


Saturday, 30 August (-1 day) Sunday, 31 August (today's feature) Monday, 1 September (+1 day) Tuesday, 2 September (+2 days) Wednesday, 3 September (+3 days)
Irish Potato Famine No current feature. Leave a message for an active Admin. No feature queued No feature queued No feature queued
MrPotatoFamine

Nutrition labels are statements of nutritional value and ingredients on food items. But that's not what I want to write about. I want to write about the Irish Potato Famine, a period of mass starvation, disease and emigration that occurred in Ireland between 1845 and 1852. A disease affecting potatoes known as "potato blight" was ultimately to blame, but most chose, and some still do to this day, to believe the famine was part of a greater conspiracy to further worsen living conditions in Ireland by the United States in order to force Irish workers to come build the transcontinental railroad.

The famine killed over one million people and nearly imploded the Irish economy due to the Irish currency being backed by potatoes. Some historians disagree with me on this point by falsely claiming that Ireland was governed by the United Kingdom at the time and that Ireland had no regional currency. I contest this on the basis that I am right and they are plainly wrong.

So there Ireland was, just an island in Northwestern Europe, a stone's throw away from Britain. It was looking idly at the ongoings of Europe, which was already dealing with the potato blight but couldn't care much about it. France was too busy raping Hajis in Algeria so that Albert Camus could pen The Stranger a century later, and Spain was too busy repeatedly declaring war on itself. Irish officials felt that their island was safe from the blight because they had just filled the Irish Sea with alligators to ward off the periodontitis-laden imperialists from the other island. Despite these efforts, several potatoes which had already got some sick made their way to the isle. Conspiracy theorists claim that the alligator infested Irish Sea would've made a point of entry from the east impossible, and thus the sickly index case potatoes must have come from America. (more...)

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