Explosion
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THIS ARTICLE A SPLODE.
“Listen to the bass go boom EXPLOSION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
~ LL Cool J on overpowering...over the competition, he's towering
“Rub my balls and BOOM!!!”
~ John Madden on explosions
“Guess what. Ka-Boom!!!”
~ Shaq on explosions
“GunPOWder!”
~ Gunpowder on explosions
“This page is DA BOMB!!!”
~ John Ritter on explosions
“At close range, they may affect your health.”
~ Captain Understatement on explosions
“Explosions go BOOM!”
~ Captain Obvious on bombs
“What the hell was that!”
~ Hank Hill after an explosion in which Dale explains he rigged his mailbox to explode in case the government arrives.
“DID SOMEBODY SAY BOOM?”
~ Sandy Cheeks on somebody saying boom
“Cool guys don't look at explosions!”
~ The Lonely Island on Explosions
An Explosion is the rapid combustion of megahurtz. It is caused by trying to fire a glock.
Explosions are the mortal enemies of lasers. Millions of years ago, long before the birth of mankind and the sticky placenta that followed, lasers and explosions duked it out in a vicious battle for supremacy to see who could be totally awesomer.
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[edit] Layman's Explanation
If qa+qb/(y-14)>36.24, the combusting energies are sufficient to cause an explosion if both objects are experiencing local gravity equal to or less than that of sea-level. The velocity of the new smaller objects (c, d,e and f) can then be calculated by:
[edit] Effects
The most common effect of an explosion is the general amusement of pyromaniacs (see idiot) who were smart enough to view from a safe distance. However there are various others including the incredibly short lifespan of organisms within, and the general creation of smaller pieces of nonliving objects. The production of smaller objects from larger ones is not always the result of an explosion however. A simple way to tell is to measure how far apart the new objects are, as explosions tend to cause these newer objects to fly about all over the place. Other signs include the mean temperature of the objects (higher after an explosion) and how much radiation you absorbed while measuring them. If the level of radiation causes sudden hair loss and/or an embarrassing rash, it is generally safe to assume that the new objects were created by a thermonuclear explosion like that which occurred at Gillgan's Island.
[edit] Creation
There are many ways to bring about an explosion. The most common way is to pop a virgin (sometimes called Cherry Bombs), although retrieval of these berries can be dangerous. Best ask an explosion-proof faerie to pop them for you. In addition, 90% of BFGs produce some form of explosion.
The following has been deleted by the Patriotism Enforcement Agency because they don't have a sense of humor.
[edit] Where Do They Come From?
[edit] The War
Throughout the war, the two sides fought viciously and often recruited outside forces for help. Lasers are known for their deadliness when combined with sharks, while the explosions saw a short-term alliance with Oprah Winfrey. The latter was not generally accepted by the majority of explosions, but their government told them all to shut the fuck up and stop bitching, so they did.
[edit] The Truce (aka, the pussy years)
After the many centuries of chaos and destruction, the lasers decided they had had enough. Supplies were scarce and morale was low among the troops. They conceded in 212402 B.C. to the explosions, who celebrated their newfound victory with pie and a nude party. It was hot.
[edit] History
Because of their victory, explosions were discovered long before lasers by humanity. The lasers actually accepted this without a fight because it was generally agreed upon that the explosions were more fit to blow stupid people's limbs and faces off. The discovery of explosions in 4 B.C. allowed them to be commercially available to Jesus Christ upon his birth. Christ, a now-known exposions fanatic, commonly blew many things up, including birds, bushes, and homeless people. Christ would later comment that "Dis shit be tight."
[edit] Explosions in Modern Society
Explosions nowadays are commonly hated upon by such racist groups as hippies and anti-war protesters. They are feared and hated for their power, but are really just misunderstood, like sharks and Paul W.S. Anderson. George Bush is a well-known advocate for explosions and adopted one as his child in 2003.It's name? What else? Karl Rove. Says Bush, "That sumbitch Kerry thinks explosions should be put in a concentration camp. Also, he punches babies."
[edit] Utilization
Explosions are used extensively by such demographics as the military, construction and demolition companies, and that really creepy guy at the office who's always muttering to himself and has the AK-47 poster up on his cubicle wall beside the KA-BAR with "Vengeance" etched in the blade.
Toy company "Mattel" recently released their "Barbie hostage crisis" playset, complete with radical militant soldiers and actual explosive ordnance. Interestingly, statistics show a 76% increase in injuries related to slipping on the bloodstains of small children and bruising from falling while trying to clean little Susan off the ceiling. Researchers are baffled as to the cause of this or whether these statistics are in any way related to the toy company, though FOX News suggests, "It was probably those liberal faggots again." A spokesman for Mattel claimed that "there was nothing to worry about" and that "you mortals can go about your meaningless lives" shortly before being sucked back into the pit of despair.
BANG!!!
[edit] Did you know...
- explosions allegedly taste a surprising amount like peanut butter. scientists are still testing how this works, but the taste apparently is literally mind blowing. So far, no results have been published; the experiments turned out to be dangerous and in all but one case deadly. Only Chuck Norris knows how explosions taste but he's not going to tell.
- Explosions are FUCKING COOL!!!!
- Explosions are WAY FUCKING COOL!!!!
- In some other videos they say what the f.. and then the explosion{check it out on youtube and search wtf boom}
- An explosion is the scientific term for when an object spontaneously turns into a larger number of smaller objects
- The death of Badly Drawn Dawg he said woof woof woof and boom!
It's on episode kaboom
