Existence
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“It reminds me everyday how wonderful existence is.”
~ Oscar Wilde on his loins
Look at all that non-existence, well yeah, there is a little existence sprinkled in.
Existence is a crock of shit.
== did you know that you exist? yes? no? ahahaaha i hate you. ==
Contents |
[edit] Who’s Your Daddy?
This is the point in the article where we have to shake hands and part ways. I know, I know - things were going so well. But you see, it’s right at this point where your parents, religious leaders, friends, tutors, television, and strangers take over. They all have a supposed greater interest in telling you the rest of this story. Don’t worry too much. When you get scared they will include fantastical images of good and evil battling it out, and good always winning. They may even throw in something about a jolly guy in a red suit who rewards you for being good, or a fairy that loves to collect human teeth. Or they may just teach you how to fire an AK-47 in the name of so and so and send you off to kill infidels. No matter what though, someone will teach you something to complete this void, leaving very little room for you to insert your own ideas. What’s that? You would like to free up some room right now? Expand your mind? No, I’m not talking about LSD silly. If you’ve got some extra space in your cranium then by all means read on.
[edit] There is No Spoon
The first thing you have to understand is there are no answers - yet . If anybody really knew why anything exists, could really explain it - then we would be finished here. Yeah that’s right, people would actually shut up, and stop fundraising. Nobody can agree on anything because the answer has not yet been discovered. It’s not love, or any of that touchy feely “why can’t we all just get along” crap. Love is not the universal answer. All the fun spiritual propaganda out there aimed at explaining the universe and moral issues still fails to logically address the issue of existence. The people around you would love for you to go back to bed, ignore these fundamentals, and swallow some dogma or other theory that’s been kicked around for the last seven thousand years. God or no gods, nobody knows where existence comes from. At this present time we can only classify the states of existence.
[edit] Being in Today's Universe
Most people are under the false impression that the universe exists. Of course in a sense it does, but logically, if the universe existed for as long as it 'did', chances are some massive object orbiting around an interfering axis would have hit our planet by know. One possible explanation for this is that the universe doesn't exist, and neither do you, so you might as well wake up.
If, in fact, the universe DOES exist, every second it becomes twice as likely that we will get hit by some massive, possibly heat emitting or radioactive nugget of space-time moving at near-speed-of-light, so you might as well rape someone to ensure you have a happy last couple minutes.
[edit] See also
- The Great Unknown
- Philosophy
- Science
- Circular Reasoning
- Pseudoscience
- Existence of God
- This Page Does Exist
- The Church of the Ironic Cheesecake.Inc
- Nihilism
 | States of Existence |
| Alive | Awake | Crunk | Asleep | Semi-Conscious | Half Dead | Half Live | Dead | Being Dead | Dream | Dreaming | Dead but dreaming | Bored | Pregnant | |
| Drunk | Stoned | Handicapped | Comatose | Undead | Born again |
