From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
EverQuest is an incredibly well made fantasy RPG made by Sony Entertainment. The game is one of the greatest games of its genre ever made. HA! Just kidding. EverQuest is a chickenshit pay to play massively multiplayer online roleplay game (MMORPG) made by the shitwizards at Sony Entertainment. The game is incredibly popular among shitmongering morons who have no lives(see nerds). The game, like many other MMORPGs follows your character's "adventures" across a world filled with other fuckwads who also pay to play the game for reasons nobody knows.
The game was developed by Sony Entertainment in the year 1986. The purpose of the game was to allow gamers an experience that "never ended, that allowed the fun to go on forever." Serious questions have been raised about how fun the game really is, but the game still manages to be very popular. Serious gamers are known to play the game for more than 50 hours a week. The game is reported to be so addicting that the game has received the nickname "EverCrack".
Point of the game (More like pointless of the game)
Your characters various skillz level up as you beat the shit out of monsters, and as you beat the shit out of monsters, you become more "powerful"(see shitful). As you become more "powerful", you can take higher level quests, which give you rewards such as fake money and items that don't exist. People sometimes waste their entire lives trying to obtain items made of multiple, shiny pixels with big numbers and text in their descriptions. People have died trying to become the most powerful player in the game (see leet). They don't pee anymore. They STOPPED PEEING.
You can be many classes in EverQuest. Their names and special traits are listed here.
- Warrior: Some burly man who is trained in the art of fucking his opponents in the ass. He focuses on leveling up in his strength skill until he is powerful enough to rape his opponents right through their pants.
- Ranger: The skills of a ranger involve attacking from a distance so they don't have to actually fight, and running away like some coward bastard really fast when they're losing(see asshole).
- Wizard: A person that specializes in not actually fighting, but waving their long sticks in the air and making yellow liquids come out of their sticks.
- Rouge: A dude who hides from everybody. His greatest skill is playing hide and get killed, and making sure that he is in no combat. He is usally weilding two butter knifes and swings repeatedly at the enemy like a crazy homo.
- Heal Bot: Looks like a real healer, smells like a real healer, and sickeningly tastes like a real healer. In reality, it's just a extra toon someone made so the CH Rot doesn't suck ass. Note that most Heal bots are female, used for masterbatory purposes.
This game has been called awesome by some reviewers. It has been called the best game of its kind ever made. However, any person with a brain bigger than a bitch's ass knows that a game made by bastards like Sony cannot be any good, no matter what. Obviously, the game sucks. Don't buy it. Don't even THINK about buying it. Don't even THINK ABOUT thinking about it. Seriously, that's how much it sucks.