EPCOT Center

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

(Redirected from Epcot)
Jump to: navigation, search
Bouncywikilogo2
For the religious among us who choose to believe lies, the so-called experts at Wikipedia think they have an article about Epcot.
EPCOT Center
Experimental Prototype Commune Of Tomorrow
Epcot
EPCOTCenter
Coat of Arms
Motto: "It's fun to be a free dictatorship!"
Anthem: One Man's Dream
Capital Future World
Previous capital World Showcase
Largest city Future World
Official language(s) Various
National Hero(es) Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse
Established 1982
Currency Disney Dollars
Religion Occult Magic
Ethnic groups Multiple
Major exports Beer, wine, Beverly, Inventions, Magic
Major imports Money
Hours of
 operation
Open year round
Internet TLD .ep

EPCOT Center is a large city-state located in central Florida built on an idea of a future that never came. There is much debate over the name EPCOT. Great debate has existed over the real meaning of the term. They include, but are not limited to

  • Every Person Comes Out Tired
  • Eisner's Personal Coin Operated Toy
  • Evil Polyester Costumes Of Torture
  • Every Pocketbook Comes Out Thinner

EPCOT was intended to be the capital of the world, once the human race agrees to rename it Disney World, and thus takes the name EPCOT Center.

edit History

In 1982, the EPCOT Center joined the Mickey Mouse League. This marked the first time that a country that was not part of the Disneyland diaspora had been part of the alliance. The early 1980s was a time when the power and prestige of the alliance began to expand dramatically. EPCOT became the diplomatic center of the alliance, with many nations choosing to build embassies in an area that came to be known as the World Showcase.

During the initial planning phases of the city, there was argument over whether to built a futuristic city or a capital city. Cultures clashed, and the end result is the current design.

During the early years, the tourism industry was less developed than anticipated, but today it is one of the most popular tourist destinations in the Disney Empire.

EPCOT Center consists of two cities, Future World and World Showcase.

edit Future World

The centerpiece of the city is the world's largest Golf Ball, a testament to golf, Florida's national sport. From 2005 to 2012 it was complemented by a large golf club. The central city is surrounded by several suburbs, such as Test Track, Imagination, Wonders of Life, and The Living Seas.

Epcotgolf
The Golf Ball, also known as Spaceship Earth

The picture to the left is not epcot center The Golf Ball, also known as Spaceship Earth is the centerpiece of the state. It contains an exhibit involving cavemen, and communication. Strangely, it has nothing to do with golf, and it isn't a space ship either. It can't fly, unless it is struck with a large golf club of comparable size. Siemens is currently working with the ISTC on actually converting it into a real spaceship should there be a need to evacuate the planet in the event of a terrorist attack.

edit Test Track

Epcot-hummers
Test Track promotes environmentally friendly forms of transport

The Test Track is the only section of the city where the automobile is in use. It demonstrates the shortcomings of automobile transportation. The exhibit shows problems such as bumpy roads, sharp turns, crashing, and more. The ride is presented by and sponsored by General Motors hard working American taxpayers; as a result, the attraction breaks down every few hours. At the end of the exhibit is a display of the latest in vehicle technology, including corn powered cars, water powered buses and more. Flying cars, however, are not included. Test Track was originally known as World of Motion and the center of vehicle development. Due to the lack of progress on building flying cars, the area was remade into the Test Track.

edit Imagination

Imaginationland
The Dreamfinder once gave tours of Imaginationland at EPCOT's Imagination labs using the Dream Catcher

Imagination is a suburb that carries out some of the research that goes on at EPCOTbuy Kodak film. One of the biggest inventions to ever come out of Imagination was the Dream Catcher, a flying machine that transported its passengers, headed by the Dreamfinder, to Imaginationlandbuy Kodak film. Unfortunately such tours had to be discontinued due to terrorist attacks and an incident in which a child was left behind and ended up being attacked by the terroristsbuy Kodak film. The facilities remain open, but the Dreamfinder is no longer presentbuy Kodak film. His Figments, however, remainbuy Kodak film. The area formerly used for the Imaginationland tours has since been converted into a Kodak gift shop. In Soviet Russia, Kodak film buy you!

edit Mission: SPACE

Due to NASA's lack of progress in the Space Program, EPCOT has its own spaceport, and is the home base of the International Space Training Center. The ISTC provides space transportation to all nations within the Mickey Mouse League. With the assistance of Gary Sinise, visitors can visit Mars using technology far superior to anything that NASA ever used. ISTC has an impressive safety record, having killed only two people, compared to NASA's killing of seven people in the last Space Shuttle accident alone.

edit The Land

The Land contains much of the food resources at EPCOT, along with the city's airport. Soarin', as the airport is commonly known, only flies to California and Disneyland. The Land also contains the nation's greenhouses, growing such crops as Mickey Mouse shaped pumpkins.

edit The Living Seas

The Living Seas provides EPCOT's sources of seafood as well as providing a place for recreational fishing and diving. Some visitors claim to have found Nemo swimming within the tanks, only for him to go missing again. There has been at least one instance of Nemo showing up at the restaurant in the Japanese embassy as sushi

edit Wonders of Life

Wonders of Life contained most of EPCOT's health care facilities using the latest in technologies. If one had a simple splinter, a team of doctors would shrink themselves down in a submarine and then have themselves injected into the patient's bloodstream. Rising insurance prices and increasing malpractice suits led to the closure of many of the facilities. Some say that the pavilion closed down because of an apparition haunting the site. Ghost hunters have identified the apparition as Buzzy, from the exhibit's brain theater facilities.

edit Universe of Energy

Universe of Energy provides power to the entire EPCOT state through solar panels on the building. It also provides a nice place for residents and visitors to take a nap while traveling through time to the age of the dinosaurs and watching a 40-minute movie of Ellen DeGeneres laughing at herself.

edit Innoventions

Innoventions is the site of much of the research that goes on at EPCOT. Companies such as HP and GE design and develop the latest technologies that intend to make life easier, but actually just make it more frustrating. Notable inventions include the solar powered flashlight, inflatable dartboards, waterproof sponges, inflatable boat anchors, submarine windshield wipers, battery powered battery chargers, and a braille enabled TV remote control.

edit MouseGear

MouseGear drives the economy of EPCOT Center. Money goes in, and cheap souvenirs go out.

Beverly
The primary draw of Club Cool

edit Club Cool

Club Cool provides drinks to the residents and visitors, including Beverly, the national drink. Club Cool provides other drinks, however Beverly remains a favorite among residents and visitors. Nobody should ever visit EPCOT without grabbing a cup of this amazing drink. Being a club, one must obtain membership by taking what is known as the Beverly Challenge.

edit World Showcase

The World Showcase contains various embassies for certain countries around the world.

edit Mexico

The Mexicans built their embassy in a giant Aztec pyramid. There is also a seaport here too, but it was modified recently due to the high number of illegal immigrants attempting to enter the country through it.

edit Norway

The Norwegian embassy unfortunately does not showcase the fjords that the country is known for, but it does have trolls. The Norwegian embassy also has a boat ride, but this one transports passengers directly to Valhalla.

edit China

The Chinese embassy contains EPCOT's sweatshops and is sponsored by its largest importer, Wal-Mart. It includes the Tiananmen Square tank ride, and a full scale replica of the Great Wall.

edit Germany

The German embassy provides much of the country's supply of beer. It also has its own high-speed rail system, speeding along at a top speed of about 2mph.

edit Morocco

There is nothing notable about Morocco. Casablanka took place here. That's it. Wait, maybe it wasn't Casablanka. Mighta been Gigli.

edit Japan

The Japanese embassy is the site of EPCOT's most popular eating establishment. It gets most of its food from The Living Seas. The local wapanese can typically be found around here. Their gift shop has all the typical Japanese musts: Tentacle Manga, Third Tier Pokemon, Shrimp Flavored Candy and Radioactive Tea.

edit Italy

The Italian embassy provides pizza and pasta (along with extra barrels of Beverly) to the population of EPCOT.

edit America

Since the Disney Empire is an independent nation, the designers felt that it was necessary to allow America to build an embassy within EPCOT's borders.

edit France

The French embassy has the Blackpool Tower and some French people. The tower is a fake, but most American tourists don't know the difference between the Blackpool Tower and the Eiffel Tower anyway.

edit United Kingdom

The British embassy offers pubs with barmaids with bad teeth, and fog machines to simulate frightful weather.

edit Canada

The Canadian embassy allows residents and visitors to experience all Canada has to offer, including igloos and ice hockey. The embassy also has regular showings of the blockbuster movie, Canada, Eh?.

edit Transportation

Dummvee
EPCOT has vehicles designed from organic and renewable materials. It's so easy that even a dummy can do it

Being a city of the future, the builders envisioned a city where everyone traveled around in flying cars, PeopleMovers and monorails. At the time, there was technology to build monorails, but not the flying cars, and the lack of taxpayer funds prevented the construction of the PeopleMovers. While the monorail system serves as an inter-city transportation system between other cities in the area, the lack of flying cars makes intra-city transportation difficult. Residents compromised with Segways, but their use is limited.

edit See also

Personal tools
projects