Emo Scene

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The Goth Scene was a movement that began towards the end of the 11th century by the decapitated artist Peter W. Hamsund and the dictator in Gotham City, Thomas Soerensen. Hundreds of thousands of artists, realizing the cold realities of this dark world and the soulless inhabitants of this Hell, turned their backs on their formerly happy creations, such as paintings of puppies and kitties frolicking in a field of roses, and instead embraced the Goth subculture. One of the more popular practices was to take the happier works of archaic authors and modernize them into a world of inner torment and pain. Suddenly, cheery works like Shakespeare, Rent and Godzilla vs. Megaman VII were cast into the dark abyss where no light penetrates. Ah, the sweet agony.


The most famous of all Goth Scenes took place on July 19th, 1999 in Canton, Ohio; the first public performance of the freshly goth-ized Romeo and Juliet. Changes to the original were many and profound, as evidenced by the new take on the famous 'balcony scene':

Juliet. God, this sucks. I hate my life. I think I'll go take a whole bottle of Valium.
Romeo. My soul is so drenched in the torment that the world heaps on me... What rhymes with 'me'? Hmm... The world blinds me 'til I can no longer see! God, I should be getting publish'd.
Juliet. Whoa, who's the hot guy? Is that Romeo? Aww, he'd never like me, I'm hideous. Ah, Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo? Hey, did you write that?
Romeo. Yeah, I know it sucks...
Juliet. No, it was great! You're so deep and profound! I can sense your torture!
Romeo. Yeah? I've got some more stuff on Fanfiction.net, if you'd like to read it. My screen name's SporkPsycho.
Juliet. Whoa, so cool. So, like, you wanna go to the mall?
Romeo. I can't, I'm grounded.
Juliet. That sucks.
Romeo. Yeah, but I'm playing Stabby Rip Stab Stab really loud, so my parents will know how much I hurt inside.
Juliet. Good plan. So, what do you usually write on?
Romeo. Love, and how the world contains none of it. I don't believe in love anymore.
Juliet. Oh no, that sucks hardcore! I'm so in love with you! If I can't have you, then I'll kill myself!
Romeo. No, don't do that, I couldn't live if you killed yourself!
Juliet. Really?
Romeo. Yeah.
Juliet. Look, sneak out, I got the new Gouge My Heart Out With A Sharp Rock Because I Love You CD today, we can listen to that and talk about how stupid the other kids at school are.
Romeo. Sounds good!
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