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Welcome to Emopedia,

The artsy and misunderstood encyclopedia that anyone can edit, but probably won't, since nobody cares.
30,656 heart-rending poems in English

Loneliness · Rejection · Love · Misery · Death · </3

Categories · Featured content · A–Z index

Today's Message of pain

Loneliness is the dark despair of solitude.

It is the feeling that no one loves me.
Not even my mom or my cat really understand the pain of Teenaged Angst.
No one understands me.
No one loves me.
My family claims that they do, but we all know they're lying.
God, I hate them so much; the fakes.
The only people who love me, The only ones who understand or care
All live in my iPod...


Valentines Day. People are supposed to be happy, right?
I'm not.
Not since she left me.
I guess she found someone more screwed up than I am,
or perhaps he's just more Scene than I, or maybe it's his hair.
It was the best three days of my life, though, with her.
She was so much better than the girl last week.
I let her draw Xs and Cut Lines on my wrists in sharpie.
They're still there, mocking me, reflecting the darkness in my soul.
They are tempting me.

Did you care...

*...that Cup Stacking is a real sport? No, really.
  • ...that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
  • ...that Cup Stacking is a real sport? No, really.
  • ...that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
  • ...that Cup Stacking is a real sport? No, really.
  • ...that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
  • ...that Cup Stacking is a real sport? No, really.
  • ...that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
  • ...that Cup Stacking is a real sport? No, really.
  • ...that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
  • ...that Cup Stacking is a real sport? No, really.
  • ...that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
  • ...that Cup Stacking is a real sport? No, really.
  • ...that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
  • ...that Cup Stacking is a real sport? No, really.
  • ...that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?

Recent deaths

JayNixon01.jpg



Today sucks because...

Elvis lives

August 20: International Random Elvis Sighting in Uncyclopedia Articles Day

  • 800 A.C. - Oscar Wilde founds Uncyclopedia by creating articles with random titles, all redirecting to Elvis.
  • 1804 - Lewis and Clark go on their famed Raping Expedition. The name causes controversy until it's discovered to be an innocent expedition to sell rapeseed to the Inuits and then have nonconsensual sex with their daughters.
  • 1977 - Elvis takes a killer shit.
  • 1991 - Fewer than infinity people rally outside the Soviet Union's parliament building protesting the placement of Elvis' portraits throughout Mikhail Gorbachev's Uncyclopedia article.
  • 1998 - The Empire strikes back, bombing Uncyclopedia with random pictures of nude Elvis, in retaliation to Elvis bombing the Empire's embassy on Earth on August 7 protesting against deleting his Uncyclopedia article by an admin who claimed the Elvis article to be a "non-notable vanity page by an anonymous Force spirit".
  • 2000 - Monkeys on strike against corrupt banana companies. Elvis calls out to fans for a total banana boycott.
  • 2002 - U.S. marines find traces of peanut butter-banana sandwiches and methamphetamines in a cave near Kabul along with a written note: "Osama has left the building".
  • 2005 - Numerous Uncyclopedia articles vandalized to denote a random sighting of the King in the article.
  • 2006 - Numerous UnNews articles vandalized by replacement with a story about Afghan police being bombed, apparently in an attempt at a badly-overstretched joke based on previous two sightings.
  • 2011 - You die.
  • 2013 - Someone thinks they see you shaking your hips while wearing blue suede shoes, but it turns out to be Elvis.
  • 2015 - Elvis announces his intent to run for president of the US stating that he will only communicate from an undisclosed location via electronic voice transmissions.
  • 2050 - Someone thinks they see Elvis, but realizes that he's probably dead by now.

Today's featured artistry

Heart-o-nails

My heart has been broken... Then taken out and had a bunch of nails put in it.

Image Credit: RadicalX
Nominate new image - View all featured images

Newest MySpace friends

Battle of Bosworth | The 100 | Twelve Tables | Jam session | New Jersey | Keynesianism (rw) | George R. R. Martin | Wat Tyler | Father Ted | Andorra | Town meeting | Mylène Farmer | Eclipse (rw) | Fringe | Millard Fillmore | Garter | Jared Leto (rw) | Counties of England | Bosnia and Herzegovina | Anderson Bruford Wakeman Howe | Boko Haram (repl) | Khmer Rouge | Sexual physics | Cruel and unusual punishment | Gravity (film) | Benzene | Glory hole | Tucson | Olfaction | ROBLOX | Donner Pass | South Carolina Highway Patrol


More newest friends | Pages that abandoned us | Lovelorn Pages | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Emo Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push

Poets of the Month

Wotm

Modusoperandi hunts down random, unfunny shit which he replaces with less-random, quasi-funny shit. Occasionally he gets up off his ass (or more correctly, sits down on it) and makes a page of his own, to which no one ever goes.

Recently he's been making pictures that people don't like and, having discovered UnNews, has been making fake news stories (rather than the fake regular stories that he normally makes).


Noobaward

The Bard (baptised 26 April 1564 – died 23 April 1616) was an English poet and playwright widely regarded as the greatest writer of the English language, and the world's preeminent dramatist. He wrote approximately 38 plays and 154 sonnets, as well as a variety of other poems. Already a popular writer in his own lifetime, the Bard became increasingly celebrated after his death and his work adulated by numerous prominent cultural figures through the centuries.


Congratulations to Hardwick Fundlebuggy, our Poet of the Year, and Mhaille, our Self-harmer of the Year!


Vote for Poet of the Month | Vote for Loner of the Month | Vote for Self-harmer of the Month | Past Losers

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