Ellipsis
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
The ellipsis (...) is a period, followed by another period, followed by another period... Basically, an untrue excuse not to have sex with you. That lying bitch...
[edit] Common Usage in Writing
The ellipsis is what you use in place of a period when you're attempting to annoy the hell out of readers who are actually trying to read in context (and thus pause at every occurance)... People of this nature are also angered by TYPING IN CAPS, so using the two in combination should not be attempted, lest they get so angry that they asplode...
If you are a lazy author attempting to convey that a character is drowzy or falling asleep, the use of an ellipsis at the end of EVERY SINGLE SENTENCE is mandatory... You may stop using them when the character wakes up, dies, or wakes (yawn) up dead... It's late... I think I'm gonna go to bed...
[edit] Uncommon Usage in Writing
The ellipsis may also be used to make your point seem uncertain or unclear, usually to win an argument with no chance of rebuttal... It will befuddle all but the smartest internets user (those with an IQ in the mid-eighties)... See example below...
- Hey, isn't bush the coolest president ever?
- Psh... He did some stuff that was bad...
- Like what?
- C'mon... Bill Clinton? Watergate? The Civil War? It's obvious...
- Oh. I guess you're right, or something. I assume that because you used an ellipsis, you must have a point that I am not aware of that effectively counters my assertions. It is implied that your point should be obvious, though is not obvious to me. It is probably because I have a subpar intellect and am poorly informed about the topic.
- Yeah...
That's how arguments EVEN BEYOND those of a political nature are won and lost... Did you see how SMART the guy typing (...) at the end of every sentence sounded? He Pwned that other guy...
[edit] How to type
It's simple... On a standard computer keyboard, press the <.> key 3 times... Assuming you're text messaging on your TRENDY FUCKING iPHONE, it is near impossible... Good fucking job, Apple...
