Ekrpat

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Welcome to Windows! Warning: New Software detected.

I told Karen to leave the computer on while I'm at work but... eh? New software? Must be another one of those shitty tax programs, or whatever. I just hope she remembered to change everything back to my settings. Oh well, let's just begin.

<apbcbiS Ydco ,cnn lprxaxnf mat. br o.bo. yr frgv
Ydco apycjn. maf x. dcnapcrgo Cu frg ap. uamcncap ,cyd ,day.k.p cy lp.y.beo yr .qlnacbw xgy ryd.p,co. frg ,cnn lprxaxnf dak. br ce.a ,day yd. d.nn co ircbi rbv Cu frg ,aby yr .ecy cyw ln.ao. erw xgy x.ap cb mcbe abfydcbi frg er co gbnct.nf yr mat. cy abf mrp. ajj.oocxn.v

Ekrpat co ab any.pbay. yfl. ru t.f mallcbi yday orm. l.rln. cb yd. ,rpne go. yr yfl.v <df yd.o. l.rln. ,rgne xryd.p yr go. ab any.pbay. m.ydre co x.frbe m.w xgy yd.f er cy abf,af abe o..m yr .bhrf cyv


Aekabyai.o

Ekrpat1
Jab frg cmaicb. orm.rb. uprm yd. 1930o gocbi ydco ,cyd a Ekrpat nafrgyZ Lp.lroy.prgow am C pcidyZ

Mroy l.rln. go. Ekrpat lpcmapcnf x.jago. yd.f jrboce.p cy a nafrgy mrp. jrmlaycxn. yr uaoy.p yfl.pov Cy yat.o a ,dcn. yr aealy yrw xgy ,d.b rb. l.pu.jyo cyw rb. jab yfl. gl yr 15 <LM uaoy.p ydab yd. n.aecbi "<>PYF yfl.pv C ucbe cy orpy ru ugbbf dr, orm.rb. jrgne erbay. mrbydo rp f.apo ru yd.cp ncu. l.pu.jycbi a jrmlncjay.e m.ydre urp orm.ydcbi ao mrry ao ,rpe yflcbiw rbnf yr iacb a u., ,rpeo rk.p yd.cp jrml.ycycrbv Cecrycjw p.annfv Aeecycrbannfw C jrboce.p ydco a dgi. oy.amcbi nraew ao C jab yfl. jcpjn.o cb "<>PYF aprgbe mf icpnupc.bew ,dr uabjc.o Ekrpatv Ire tbr,o ,dfw ydrgidv C ydcbt od. mcidy uabjf ryd.p ydcbio yrrv N.y-o eprl yd. ogxh.jyv

Ryd.p aekabyai.o cbjnge. ann ru yd. kr,.no (A>RCG abe orm.ycm.o F) cb jnro. lprqcmcyf yr .ajd ryd.pv Yd. kr,.no yat. yd. ap.a ru aoeuiw matcbi yd.m .aocnf ajj.oocxn. ao ,.nnv L.porbannfw C oycnn ucbe yd. ypaecycrban "<>PYF nafrgy ogl.pcrpw mroynf x.jago. ann ru yd. kr,.no cb a pr, co yrr rxkcrgo a laoo,rpe ao jrmlap.e yr yd. ypaecycrban aoeuv <day a jnaoocjw yday aoeu! <dr jrgne lroocxnf lp.u.p xrpcbi rne AR>G rk.p yd. anp.aef ,ce.nf ajj.ly.e AOEUZ Ogjd xane.peaod!

Dcoyrpf

Ekrpat ,ao cbk.by.e cb yd. .apnf 1930o xf Agigoygo Ekrpatv Br,w C-m lp.yyf ogp. ann ru frg ap. aotcbi ,df orm. jpajtlry ,rgne cbk.by a nafrgy urp a t.fxrape rk.p y,.byf f.apo x.urp. yd. ucpoy jrmlgy.p t.fxrape ,ao .k.p cbk.by.ew erb-y jrm. yr m. urp abo,.pov C-m ao egmxurgbe.e ao frgv Orm. ogii.oy cy ,ao urp yfl.,pcy.pow xgy ,dr ,rgne p.annf ick. a eamb xajt yd.bZ Drb.oynfv Yd. ydcbi ,ao hgoy cbk.by.ew ,rgne abfrb. cb yd.cp pcidy mcbe ,aby yr jdabi. cyw cu yd. ,drn. "<>PYF nafrgy ,ao oycnn b., yr yd.mZ P.mcbeo m. ru ,day Tap.b .ql.jyo ru rgp o.q ncu.v Yd. cboyaby ,. lgy .k.pfydcbi rgy rb yd. yaxn. ann ru a ogee.b od. ,abyo yr aee cb ann yd.o. lrcbyn.oo tbcjto abe tbajtov Or go.n.oov


Dvoraklol
Agigoy Ekrpat cb ann dco inrpfv Bry. dco odcuyf .f.o abe ojpguufw anmroy jpcmcbanw e.m.abrpv Bry orm.xref frg-e ypgoy ,cyd a gbck.poan t.fxrape nafrgyw .dZ

Orm. go.po ru Ekrpat

Bry yr m.bycrb mf icpnupc.be anor go.o Ekrpvvv ,acyv Rd yday ireeamb nrgof orb ru a[[ drne rbv

Okay, I knew that worthless bitch forgot to change the settings back to QWERTY. That stinkin, lousy, cheating piece of... bleh. Well, I guess I just wasted twenty minutes of my life, just like those 500 emails I also accidentally wrote in Dvorak, and that slide show that almost cost me my job. She'll be in for a real treat when she gets back from the "spa". I bet she's still seeing that goddamn muscle-shirt wearing lifeguard when she's out, anyway. I don't know why I even bother with her anymore. I don't know if it's the keyboard or the time she spends MIA or the... ah, forget it why am I even telling you. You probably don't even care.


To hell with this. I'm gonna go shoot some heroin and go to bed.

See also

Brbo.bo.
AAAAAAAAA! | 01000010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001 | [[ [[[ v[v vvv v z [v[v [[[ [vv v | >XI13 | Apu.bdrgo. | C18b | Xpacnn. | oepa,tjax | Cbo.py ycyn. d.p. | | 8v3 | Xnad | E.k.nrl.po! | ME5 | Xaei.p xaei.p xaei.p | Prnncbi frgp d.ae rb yd. t.fxrape | Ann ,rpt abe br lnaf mat.o Hajt a egnn xrf | 1337 | Ekrpat | T.bbf MjJrpmcjt | Xguuanr | "gajt | X.ayxrqcbi | Mf t.fxrape co mcoocbi cyo drm.pr, | C hgoy onam rb yd. t.fxrape abe maicj dall.bo | Nrp.m Clogm | Xpacbugjt | Oyaycj | Y9 | Rrt | Jngjt | Kabeancom


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