Ed, Edd n Eddy
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
|Ed, Edd n Eddy|
|Genre||Cartoon soap opera|
|Stars|| Matt Damon|
Samuel L. Jackson
|No. of episodes||131|
Ed, Edd n Eddy is a 1990s Cartoon Network show, which many think is an American production but is actually secretly produced by Canadians. With its jazz soundtrack, nostalgic childhood themes, and occasional melancholy moments, it is essentially Peanuts for a new generation, only with more violence and cruelty.
The show initially ended its run after four seasons, but was renewed for two more after proving to be popular with teens. It was one of CN's last good shows, before all the crap came along.
The show focuses on the lives of 12 children living in the fictional town of Peach Creek (aka: the Cul-De-Sac). The main stars of the show are three kids who have "Ed" in their names and are best friends. A typical episode involves them trying to scam the other kids for jawbreaker money, but these scams fail horribly most of the time and the Eds are usually left in some predicament that usually involves them getting their asses brutally kicked.
- Ed – An idiot with the same IQ as a moldy wedge of Port Salut. He often encounters difficulty in completing impossible tasks, such as: buttering toast, blinking and breathing, with his greatest achievement being getting himself dressed. Though he is good at being a woodpecker with dirt. He has a little sister who abuses him if he doesn't do what she bids of him.
- Edd (Double D) – A genius surrounded by total idiots. He's like MacGyver and can build stuff out of common household items. He can calculate the distance from Earth to the sun down to nanometers just like that. For this reason, the neighborhood kids like him slightly more than the other Eds. It's probably because of his slick black ski hat.
- Eddy – The leader of the Eds and the Cul-De-Sac's resident prick. Eddy has an obsession with money and jawbreakers, mainly because jawbreakers look like dragon's eggs and, according to an urban legend, eating them is considered to be good luck. However, this is clearly a lie, as Eddy gets his ass kicked in pretty much every episode of the show.
- Sarah – Ed's loud and deranged little sister. Sarah is typically seen with her
friend/bitch, Jimmy, the town's personal punching bag. Sarah loves Jimmy so much that she makes anyone who harasses Jimmy into her personal punching bag. This spoiled brat thinks, that she is the king of this known world. She also wields great strength, like a weightlifter.
- Jimmy – An effeminate, wimpy boy who plays with dolls and rides tricycles. He is the town's personal punching bag who gets his ass kicked by the Eds, the Kids, the math club, the sewing club, chess team, the band, cheerleaders, the sports teams, and everyone else. Sarah is pretty much Jimmy's only friend. Besides Mr. Yum Yum, a stuffed bunny which was devoured and mutilated by Ed.
hnny 2x4 and Plank – An annoying maniac who has a piece of wood, Plank, as his only friend. Long ago, Jonny saved Plank from a woodchipper by putting his hand inside and grabbing him, that's how much Jonny loves him and how insane he really is. In addition, Jonny has a superhero alter-ego, Captain Melonhead. He always calls himself "Jonny" with no 'h' and adds a '2x4' to his name for some reason.
- Rolf – Rolf was born in some mysterious lands, where people talk in 3rd person and celebrate retarded customs. Rolf owns a farm in his backyard where he keeps his pig Wilfred, and his goat, Victor. Like Johnny, he is not a normal person (not even in his own country) and many have questioned where Rolf is from (Stuttgart - Germany is a hypothesis).
- Nazz – The hot, sexy chick who has big boobs and was always in a good mood thanks to her prescription. She is the head cheerleader at Peach Creek Junior High, although she got kicked off of the team when she refused to shave her hairy legs or take off the implants that on her cleavage.
- Kevin – The local Jock and bully to others, he feels that picking on everyone will help even out his horrible life. He is known for calling people dorks, when Kevin himself is secretly a dork too, and a poser+-loser.
- The Kanker Sisters – White trailer-trash bitches who are desperate and retarded enough to go for the Eds. They simply like basking in people's misery, coming out of nowhere and coupling with the Eds any time the writers can't think of anything else.
Due to their tendency to cancel shows that are actually good, Danny Antonucci departed from Cartoon Network in 2007 and moved to Disney Channel on a 7-month contract, after which came back to CN to direct the Big Picture Show TV movie. He was still pissed he got a $70 pay deduction.
Big Picture Show left some fans wondering... how long before the inevitable Ed, Edd n Eddy: The College Years spin-off?