ED-209

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For the religious among us who choose to believe lies, the self-proclaimed experts at Wikipedia have an article very remotely related to ED-209.
Geordi-laforge-c

ED-209 on Star Trek.

"LeVar Burton" redirects here. Although if you'd bothered to actually read the article, then you'd know this has absolutely nothing to do with him.
“Captain Picard works for OCP, OCP Runs the cops, he's a cop.”
~ Oscar Wilde on ED-209
“Geordi... Geordi La... ED-209....”
~ ED-209 on his roots

ED-209 (February 16, 1986-199X) is a cyborg sent back in time to help with the war against the machines, but when these plans are de-railed he ends ends up fighting in the war against the machines.

edit Mission Start

ED-209 first appeared on Star Trek: The Next Generation. Viewers had been receiving hints that there would be an android on the show. No sooner had he appeared on screen than everyone knew who the android was: ED-209!

edit Taste the Feel of Robotic Visionary

To get a taste of what it feels like to be a robot,

  1. Find a comb.
  2. Take the comb.
    2A. Wash the comb.
  3. Dry the comb.
  4. Grab the comb goodwise fashion aiming tip pointer finger outways toward the front. Place finger (index) and comb toward top of nose horizontal fashion rotated teeth downward, being careful not to hurt the nose. See through the comb and turn to a black man.

Congratulations. You are now officially a Robot. You may now take the alias Mr. Ed.

  1. Give the comb back.
  2. Apologize to comb pwner.

edit The transition to Detroit

Ed209flower

Levar Burton in the ED-209 Battle Armor costume.

A biological clone of ED-209, this time human, and with biological eyes, was produced for the movies by Captain Picard, who then sent the original back in time to help with the war against the machines in 1997.

He got lost when RoboCop, using his horns, grabbed him in the middle of time travel and made him stay in Detroit in 199X, because RoboCop can do that.

edit Future Plans

He's going to be one of the main characters in the Robocop movie that's coming out in 2010. Robocop will use a bunch of Ed-209's against the Terminators (Shhh! They're in the movie by suprize!) OCP vs. Skynet.

Now didn't I just imply that there is one ED-209? *Sigh* Okay then, here's the spoiler.

edit Spoiler

By reading this, you are now spoiled. To become unspoiled, forward this to 5 friends. If you don't, you'll be attacked by geordies, and your family will shame shame you.

edit Spwilt.

You're spoiled. You're a spoiled brat. Spoiled like spoiled food. Spoiled fruit is bad. And smelly. You're gross. You smell. You're smelly. I won't call you Mr. Ed anymore. Go take a bath.

edit To be continued...

Robocop spoils us all by making clones of ED-209--as many as each man wants! Yay! Aren't you excited? But the thing is that since it's a movie you won't really get an ED-209 even if you want one. Did you ever have one of those dreams where you had something that was cool, then when you woke up, you didn't have it and you were bummed out? That actually happened to me for the Gameboy Advance before it was ever conceived (see pointless rambling).

Captain Picard shows him how to make clones in the future but RoboCop doesn't have the aid of replicators. Now since RoboCop makes clones first, it actually leads to the start of cloning and eventually to the invention of replicators, which is how Captain Picard made ED-209 in the first place! Great Scott!

edit See also

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